Is anyone else so sad?

[Mamajustwingingit]

My youngest starts primary this September and I am devastated. I can’t stop crying, it’s breaking my heart.

I don’t know how reframe my thinking, has anyone felt like this too? I was incredibly sad when my eldest started too but I think having a younger one to come home to, helped soften the blow. ☹️

When are they 5? My summer born child is going to do part time until year one as that's when they are compulsory school age. Even a September baby can do part time until December.

That’s fine if it’s in your child’s best interests but it should be for them, not the parent. OP, I sort of understand what you mean - it’s a big step, but a wonderful one as well.

I'd argue that it's in any summer born child's best interests. There's so much development between just turned 4 and soon to be 5. The difference is huge. Fatigue doesn't help kids adapt to change, but a couple of afternoons to decompress definitely does.

I can still remember how sad I was, and it’s 13 years ago that my youngest dd started reception. I was distraught.

Yesterday I was in Sainsbury’s and a mum was showing her little dd the uniforms and saying how lovely it would be to go to school in September, and I nearly cried!

It’s a massive step as a parent, some people are fine with it, some aren’t. Just plan something nice for yourself for that day :)

OK but the OP hasn’t said how old her child is! For all we know she turns five on the first of September !

Yes, I am going to be a total mess. We did get confirmation to delay her start until next September (summer born) but she’s now going to a small private school this September. I hope we’ve made the right decision!

My youngest starts primary this September and I am devastated. I can’t stop crying, it’s breaking my heart

This seems like a very extreme reaction. Are you otherwise ok?

I think most of us feel like this when our last one goes off to school. My youngest is 37 and I can still remember the sadness but you soon get into a new routine and get used to it.

Nope, not all of us feel like this. My youngest is starting primary school in September and I'll be breathing a sigh of relief to get a bit more time back for myself! I'm a sahm and have had the luxury of plenty of time with her over the past 4 years (and 4 years with her sister before that), and will have years of school holidays and weekends together for years to come. I'm looking forward to shifting my attention to getting my body back into shape, studying and redecorating!

Christ I’m counting down the days until my littlest starts (2+ years) 😭 does that make me a terrible mother ?!?

Wait till your youngest finishes GCSEs, that crept up on me

Not really. I just feel privileged that my children are happy and healthy enough to be growing up! It doesn’t mean you shouldn’t feel sad though. Baby and toddlerhood just go by so fast don’t they. My youngest starts primary this year, and while it’s a huge milestone, I’m so excited for her! Do something nice for yourself on your DC’s first day. ❤️

Sure I missed them but as they went off happily i thought we must have done not a bad job and they are not a possession but their own person

Nope, I was delighted when my youngest started school, tbh.

Nope.
I was excited for them, starting the next step on the journey.

I was excited - 6hrs child free, 5 days a week

I don’t really get this beyond regret I didn’t try harder to make being a SAHM work - just couldn’t get over the financial pressure / knowing it’s on me to be the main breadwinner as the higher earner and being in jobs that wouldn’t allow part-time. I guess it’s only a thing if you’ve been lucky / brave enough to be a SAHM? I wish I had been. I’ll have the same time day to day with my DD when she goes this year as all the years I’ve missed so far 😢

I was a bit emotional on the day, but it was one teary moment as I left him (after he was in, he didnt see!). I'm a little concerned for you if it is making you cry that much when it's still 6 weeks away. Are you in a good place otherwise? ,

No. I was excited for her new chapter. DD was so excited to go to school and so ready for it that it was impossible to feel sad. A small twinge of "oh she's growing up" on her first day but otherwise no real sadness.

If you can, try and talk yourself out of this. Your child will pick up on the sadness and carry it forward. The.most anxious kids at the gate tend to have anxious parents (just from my own observations).

Be excited for them!

After all, the whole point of parenting isn't to horde their cute years but to grow them up into good people. Be proud of them growing up, it means you're doing a great job!

I was the same!!

I'm so excited! Finally coming to the end of 6 full years of nursery fees and looking forward to being able to return to work and not be skint. It's only 6.5 hours a day and we have all the school holidays to plan fun stuff!

Do you mind sharing details on this? He’s a summer baby and only just turned 4

Isn’t 5 until July 2026 ☹️

Thank you all for your responses!
little one is only JUST 4! Summer baby.

little one is really excited, absolutely loved taster day and that does make me really happy but I can’t help feeling so sad. I thought about part time but I then thought who am I doing this for? Little ones benefit or my own?

I found this a very difficult step and it's something I'm still processing. My strategy was to really focus on doing right by my child, if this is the right step for them then that has to be the first priority.

For yourself just try to find some self care to get you through any difficult times and be kind to yourself.