Breastfeeding frequency newborn (reassurance)

[PippinTheFool]

Hi All,

Just looking for a little reassurance that this is normal.

Baby girl was born 6 days ago, normal delivery just long. Spent two days in hospital as she was super lethargic and not eating well. Originally a tongue tie was expected but this wasn't the case.

We're home now and im guessing this is cluster feeding.... but there's been literally no reprieve from feeding. We're currently on feed number 20 of the day, over 4.5hrs on the boob. Ive had no chance for naps.

I am falling asleep over myself and dreading tonight as I just dont know how ill stay awake.

It absolutely can be but I urge you, if you're just going by the NHS, to get a private lactation consultant out to check for TT. midwives aren't trained it and very often miss it - it seriously affected the BF journey of my first, and with my second feeding took her so much effort she'd fall asleep and not quite get enough. Both times I was told no TT.

You may find she's feeding lots because it's taking her longer, but cluster feeding can really feel all encompassing even without TT. It does get better though, I promise xx

Totally normal. But its hard!
Can someone take her out in the pram so you can have some naps?

I demand fed mine, somedays it was near enough continuous! It get better fairly quickly though, by 6 weeks we were settled into a decent routine with just the evening when they clustered

Midwife here. It’s hard to tell from what you have said if it is normal or not, some babies do feed very regularly but I suspect given the history that you have given that it may reflect a bit of a feeding challenge. I would check your baby’s latch, are you seeing swallowing? How do your breasts feel before and after feeds? Is baby peeing and pooing enough (8 wet nappies and a couple of yellow poos daily at this stage is normal )

Definitely seek extra support with feeding- lots of options including lactation consultants, postnatal doulas, midwives and breastfeeding supporters (some will be free, others paid for). Try ringing the la leche league or association of breastfeeding helplines for more support

This can be normal and is part of building up your milk supply, however it can also be a sign if ineffective feeding. Did you see the midwife yesterday and was your baby weighed? Also what is going on with nappies?

Congratulations on your new baby, often babies cluster feed relentlessly but it should settle down within 24 hours.

I didnt time mine but for the first few weeks I barely left the armchair as she was latched CONSTANTLY. She used to feed for like 45 mins at a time, half a short snooze on the breast wake up and start again. If it wasn't for my partner making sure I was fed and watered I probably wouldn't have been. Its totally normal however if you have any concerns always reach out to your midwife, HV or GP. But mine was exactly the same, she's 6 months now and still a frequent feeder, but it's nothing like it was during those first weeks. They get quicker at feeding and go longer stretches between feeds as they grow. Hang in there ❤️

Definitely normal but if you have a breastfeeding cafe or drop in near you where someone can watch you feed and help with latch it may help her feed more efficiently.

I went with a friend thinking I had it nailed but was amazed by the difference some minor adjustments made

I remember being in tears regularly, my nipples being in agony, absolutely dreading every feed and I couldn't even get a shower without the baby crying for more feeds! It can be normal, but feeding is also a comfort thing not just a feeding thing.
Both of mine had tongue ties, and the absolute best money I ever spent was on a private lactation consultation. Absolute lifesaver as I couldn't get any help on the NHS (I would have given up bf by the time she'd had it seen to) and I was given extremely practical advice specific to my needs, not necessarily just following the blanket recommendations NHS have to follow.

Sending hugs though as it can feel like the baby is constantly on you. Don't be afraid to take a break if you need it - even if it means someone else feeding them (if you're happy for them to) or the baby simply being comforted in other ways by some else while you rest.

Does baby have a dummy?

Sounds v normal to me too, but second the recommendation of a lactation consultant. They can double check for TT and the latch. Regardless, it definitely won’t last forever, I promise.

Is your mattress quite firm? I ask because side-feeding lying down with baby next to you was game changing for me when feeding so frequently. If you follow the Lullaby Trust safe sleep guidelines you can then co sleep to get some better rest. I have done that with all my babies. If you’re uncomfortable doing it overnight, you could do it for some day time rest and if your partner is with you, he/she could watch you while you sleep and baby feeds (we did this with my first because I was nervous about rolling into him and partner just kept an eye while I slept and baby fed).

Yeah pretty normal. I used to have hallucinations from extreme sleep deprivation in the first 4 weeks or so. My son could "cluster feed" for 12 hours at a time.

Thanks everyone, the reassurance means so much. To answer some questions:

• Midwives referred us to a consultant about the tongue tie who we saw a couple of days ago. He said the tie was so mild he didn't see any reason to cut it, as it would only be minimally impacting her feeding and she'd learn around it.

• Day 5 check up yesterday she'd lost 9%, so midwife was happy

• We're at about 7 dirty nappies and 2 just wet nappies today

9% weight loss on day 5 is within the normal range.

9 wet and dirty nappies in 24 hours, is normal.

Sounds like you have this mamma!

All my babies fed pretty much constantly for the first 12 weeks or so tbh. Only one of the three had a mild tongue tie (which was left as it was and loosened up over time).

It's so hard OP but it does settle down eventually.

Ah it does sound like you're doing really well (as in baby is well fed!) and the tongue tie hopefully isn't impacting too much if you've been seen already. I think I found that as they got bigger feeding got easier (and they do grow quickly - by week 6 it was definitely much easier both times) partly because their mouths get bigger so they can latch better and just be more efficient! Feeding does just take forever at first - they have teeny tummies so they fill up quick, but then need to feed again soon after. It is really relentless and you genuinely just feel like a milk machine for them.
As another PP mentioned I also managed to do the odd feed laying down in bed and managed to get a bit of rest that way. Even if you're not asleep, just laying down is still nice! I did find it harder when they were really tiny though as I had to hold them on physically to maintain the latch until they got a bit bigger and could sort of stay on themselves.
You got this mama :-)

Health wise, she sounds like she’s doing fab. She’s had a little bit of weight loss, which is normal, but she will regain that.

I have absolutely no idea about number and length of feeds because I did not track that. I’d encourage you not to either. It sounds like it’s giving you anxiety and it’s not useful information anyway.

Who is there supporting you? Do you have a partner or family member around? If she is feeding 4 hours a day, then you should have a whole 20 hours when she is not feeding to sleep, eat, whatever. Mine was definitely taking about an hour per feed, probably 8-10 feeds or more in 24 hours. In between the feeds (not every single one, but many), I’d hand them off to Dh and go for a nap. He’d walk around for hours carrying them, go for a quick drive, go for a walk in the pushchair, basically anything to keep them going for an hour or two to let me sleep.

We did the same thing at nighttime. 7pm-1am I’d sleep and Dh would bring them to me for feeds and then go back downstairs with them. I’d have to do 2 feeds in that time, but I could sleep uninterrupted the rest of it and then I’d take over and co-sleep safely for the rest of the night.

My breastfed baby fed a lot and for very long feeds as well, often on both sides. I remember always feeding before I left even for just a quick trip, when I got there, before leaving for home again, then once back at home. The early weeks/months were just a lot of feeding.

As far as I'm aware it's completely normal and all about building up supply as well.

When I got my head round it was normal, at home I used to make sure I was always set up - so had a water bottle, maybe hot drink, biscuits, fruit or whatever easy snack can be eaten with one hand, TV remote or Kindle. Especially in the night I'd have my Kindle so could read one handed and it helped having something to focus on.

Can be normal. DD1 was like that. I barely left the sofa for weeks (a good box set and the remote, your phone, a book, drink and snacks within reach). I did like the reassurance of seeing a breastfeeding councillor at a breastfeeding support group though. We co-slept at night so I could sleep whilst she fed.

DD2 wasn't like this, she just had a feed then played or slept happily till the next one.

Totally normal, I’m sad to say. It will settle down-you just have to hang in there. Is there someone who can take her out in the pram for a bit? Thr will give you a break at least.