Optimum nursery hours for 3 year old while on maternity leave?

[wishIwasonholiday10]

I'm trying to decide what hours to keep my 3 year old in nursery while on maternity leave with my 2nd and am keen to hear what worked for other people. She will be 3.5 when sibling arrives and start school a few months after 4 as she is summer born. She currently goes 4 days a week and has one day with me where we go swimming. We won't need her nursery place after maternity leave unless she is deferred from starting school (not something I'm strongly considering although a possibility as she has gross and fine motor delays).

I'm tossing up between keeping the same pattern, reducing her days to 3 to save money or even increasing to 5 days for the first sleep deprived period when I will also be recovering from a C-section. I'm a bit concerned about my ability to manage both for the first bit when I am recovering and DD currently still needs lifting sometimes. My maternity leave will start in late Nov so its also not a nice time of year for entertaining a pre-schooler if the weather is shit. We won't even be able to do our normal swimming activity as she is not ready to be in the pool without me yet.

If your first started school while you were on maternity leave did you leave them in nursery until school started or take a break over summer? Is it good for getting school ready to leave them in nursery at least a few days or nicer to give them a proper break and try to spend some time together?

Sorry if this post is a bit rambling, I just don't know what is best for all of us (me, her and the baby).

I think I'd just leave her as she is if she's happy in that routine. You will get the hang of two quicker than you imagine and she's old enough that she night even be able to help you a little.

This is a bit 'how long is a piece of string' question tbh OP. You will get such varied responses.

DC1 was in nursery 3 days a week initially. I reduced DC1's nursery to 2 days a week from when I went on mat leave about a month before DC2 was born. I really enjoyed spending the extra time with her before DC2 was born, and throughout the mat leave, and of course it saved us a lot of money. I wouldn't have done less than 2 days though, our nursery have a minimum booking pattern of 2 days anyway but I think that's the least you can get away with to keep them familiar and comfortable with the setting tbh. She went back up to 3 days a week without issue when DC2 also started at 10 months old.

DC2 was only going to nursery 2 days a week when I went on mat leave for DC3 as our circumstances had changed in the interim. I've kept him there as usual.

I do know people whose children went full time and stayed full time throughout, to people whose kids went full time but went right down to 2 days a week during mat leave. It's totally varied.

Personally I'm happy with the choices we made to have them in just 2 days a week. I enjoyed spending the extra time with them although of course it was hard at times. And I enjoyed having 2 days a week just me and the baby for contact naps, housework, baby cinema, baby groups etc.

Oh also, my eldest is summer born, but she stayed at nursery the year after when DC2 started because we decided to send her to school at 5. We did keep her in nursery until literally the week before school starting but by then she had been back down to 2 days a week for months anyway. She settled into school without any issues.

DC1 was in nursery 3 days a week age 3 when DC2 was born. I always intended to drop him down to 2 days to spend more time/spend less money... but truthfully I needed those 3 days knowing he was being entertained and fed elsewhere!

3 days is a good balance, I think, especially as the baby gets older and they can do a bit more stuff 'together' (although it will be more 'baby tags along while you entertain 3yo')... but if 4 suits you now and you can afford it, I wouldn't feel bad about it.

I had a similar experience although mine was going to preschool at the same nursery in the September ( both dc may born), usually went 4days but i used annual leave every week to drop a day at nursery in the run up to maternity leave but saved the money in the tax-free childcare account so he could continue 3 days right up until September. I too had a c section and it was a godsend to have a break from the eldest and for the first few weeks after dh going back to work my mil had him on his days off from nursery

I have the same age gap, DD also summer born. We did preschool full time. She’d been used to longer full time days at the day nursery when I was working so was already cutting hours compared to what she’d been used to, I was also thinking of the transition to school and also what was easiest for me with a newborn in winter. She did have the whole summer off before going into reception though, because it was the school nursery so term time only, but that was fine as baby was older, I was still off, the weather was good and we mixed it up with some holiday camps. I’d keep minimum 3 days to get ready for school, assuming you don’t defer, but otherwise just do what works for you! There’s no right/wrong answer.

I went on maternity leave the Feb and my DS started school in the Sept. He was 4.5 years (nearly - Sept baby). I reduced him down from full time to 3 days (sometimes 2 days) a week. There were also staffing issues in nursery at that time so reducing to 3 days a week was beneficial to both me and the nursery. The weeks he did 2 days were where they didn't have enough staff - it was the middle of that really hard time for childcare setting with staff.

The 3 days a week works great. He did tues to thurs to keep consistency. It meant I didn't get 2 days in a row on my own with both children (DH at home at weekends) which in the early days I was grateful for when baby wasn't sleeping much or cluster feeding. But I also got a good amount of day with my DS before he started school. I planned alot of days out focussed around DS. Big days out to smaller things depending on the weather. I'd worked full time since he was 11 months so I wanted to make the most of time before school started. We sometimes did weekends away with family (DH would come just for the sat and sun) or visiting friends overnight.
I know you said it will be Nov but the run up to Christmas events will start and I think its a magical time of year for 3.5 -4 year old.

I also kept him on the 3 days over the summer. I think it was really beneficial for him with starting school. We did take extra holidays a few of the weeks but he was in at least 2 days every week for the 6 week holidays

It’s really hard to be able to plan in advance. I’d stick as you are for now and you can always drop a day at the time if it feels manageable. We dropped DC1 down to two mornings a week once DC2 was born and I found that nice for doing baby groups etc that I couldn’t have done with both of them. Kept them in the routine of going so when the days went back up when I returned to work it was fine. I enjoyed the extra time with DC1, so I’d not have wanted to send them more but that’s just my personal preference.