Help a knackered ftm: formula the old-fashioned way

[Pessimist]

I have low breast milk supply so am having to use formula for feeding my newborn. The feeding plan is brutal and goes something like this:

1. strip baby to nappy (+ change if dirty) for skin-to-skin (3 mins)
2. boil kettle for formula
3. offer both breasts to baby (10 mins)
4. make up formula using 10-minute boiled water from kettle so it's hot but hasn't stripped all the nutrients, hopefully (2 mins)
5. console screaming baby while trying to cool the formula (150 years)
6. feed baby with lots of wind breaks (20 minutes)
7. pray baby sleeps and wash bottles for steriliser (2 mins)
8. settle baby so I can use the double pump (20 mins)
9. pump to encourage supply even though I probably have IGT (20 mins)

repeat every three hours. Try not to fall asleep standing up/while burping. Pray baby doesn't stay awake between breast and bottle cooling.

I'm broken. I'm terrified to use the perfect prep machine - my brother's baby was very poorly after an issue with theirs. I don't have the money for fancy gadgets like the rapidcool. My mum's telling me to pre-make the formula and put in the fridge and reheat, but 31 years later questions whether the warming up is safe and we know from hard-won experience that baby doesn't take cold milk.

I don't have family nearby and my husband has gone back to work today. I'm really struggling and need sleep. I set alarms to make sure baby gets fed every three hours and either the whole thing takes that long with settling, or I sleep through the alarms. By the time baby is awake, it's taking too long for my milk and the formula. I don't know how anyone does this 8 times a day.

My mum said it was very much a thing in 1989 when she had me! Her midwife was particularly helpful though, my mum still remembers her really fondly and mentions what an angel she was. So I think the knowledge was very much there but BF support generally is hit and miss in the UK

It doesn't mean it's a fad.

It means that maternity services are doing more now to support maternal and infant health. Have a look at the UNICEF Baby Friendly Initiative - many NHS services follow this approach
https://www.unicef.org.uk/babyfriendly/

Me too! Both strapping 20 somethings now.

Made up 4 bottles in advance, using boiled water that had been allowed to cool a bit and then flash cooled them under the cold tap and put them in the back of the fridge.

Friend that worked in NICU said they used a microwave to warm milk - you just shake it well and test it. She laughed at me faffing around with a jug of hot water.

Doesn’t mean it wasn’t a thing. It may not have been appropriate for yours, or your hospital may not have been informed. Believe me it can take years for hospitals to let go of what they’ve always done and adopt new protocols.

it wasn’t mentioned to me when I had mine, but I still knew about it. Just because I wasn’t told about it doesn’t mean it didn’t exist.

I had my babies in 1989, 1992 and 1995

never heard of skin to skin until I read it on here a few months ago

How old is baby? Can they go longer between feeds if you’re setting alarms? 4 hours perhaps?
the nuby rapid cool is about £30. I think this can be justified to save your sanity. If not, make the bottle before you start your routine? Then you won’t need to faff about cooling- it should be cool by that point!
can you pump whilst feeding? Kill two birds with one stone

it gets a bit easier when they’re taking less feeds but bigger amounts. The beginning is HARD.

We had one of these. It's £28 on Amazon.

Skin to skin was never even mentioned when I had my three between 1995 and 2002. Of course , it may well have been a thing for other people, but I don't remember it and didn't consciously do it. We bonded perfectly well, and as I said earlier in the thread,

I was exclusively formula feeding and very quickly learned that making up enough feeds for the next day 24 hours in advance was the way to go as I said earlier in the thread. I even usually stored them in the door of the fridge, for which I am sure someone will be along to give me a wrist slap! Nobody died, my babies thrived and didn't get stomach upsets. All feeds were microwave warmed and given a good shake before being fed to baby.

Skin to skin was a thing on the 90s it just didn’t have a name it’s just what you did!

Two DCS born in the 90s and this was my experience too.
Formula made up for the day every morning and then warmed in the microwave, or given at room temp if we were out and about.
DCs 27/29 and still thriving.

I was told similar OP. Midwife was telling me that she’d managed to pump for twins. I didn’t get much out with the pump. One night when baby didn’t want to feed off me and was just trying to doze back off, I looked at my husband and said “what the fuck are we doing? We have a baby that wants to sleep at night, eats when hungry, is gaining enough weight?” It seemed to make no bloody difference over a 24 hour period how much she was taking, whether she was up every three hours or not (but like you say, process takes more than 3 hours). She would also get frustrated as couldn’t get what she needed from me. I was pissing around for hours a day to not pump very much. I gave up, had some guilt, but ultimately couldn’t hack it. For me personally, it was more bonding when she looked up at me from a bottle, making her satisfied sounds, than the struggle of numerous positions trying to get her to feed from me. Good luck, it’s a tough time.

When I formula fed my oldest (16 years ago) I used to make 4-6 bottles with the kettle then place them all in a bowl of cold water until cooled then put in the fridge, all this faffing about making up fresh feeds everytime is unnecessary and leads to more stress when you're dealing with a screaming baby, everyone I knew who formula fed also did it that way, yes the health visitor told me to make them fresh everytime but couldn't give me a reason as to why they can't be refrigerated and just said its the "guidelines" to make up fresh every time so that's what they have to advise

In your situation I would use ready made formula and one of those bottle warmers and cut yourself a bit of a break. Secondly can you get some good Breastfeeding guidance because it’s not sustainable what you are doing now.

Were you advised to bf for just 10 mins. A very small baby could be 40 mins or more. Are they having problems latching. Are they getting a rhythmical suck/swallow thing going after the first few minutes ? If you have been told you have IGT - has anyone mentioned the SNS system. Have a look, maybe it could help.

Personally I stopped waking up my children when it seemed they were gaining weight and feeding well. Two of them woke up after 4.5 hours naturally anyway. But that is child dependent of course.

Ahhh bless you, you sound absolutely knackered with it all.....

I'm going to be really honest with you.... stop!! Stop the feeding regime you have, stop the tripple feeding & stop BF but most of all please stop putting yourself through this.

A Happy, rested mum makes for a happy baby. Also a fed baby is best regardless of BF or formula.

Both my boys had formula from day 1, their now 9 & 6 and are absolutely smashing it, super healthy, active and flying academically & in sports. They both also have great immune systems and very very rarely get ill. I also pre made their feeds every morning and bought the TT flask to heat them up when out and about and the bottle sleeve.

This is one of the main reasons I didn't BF by boys, simply because I have seen too much of this where new mums put so much pressure on themselves.

X

My kids are 11 and 16, both bottle fed. I used to make up 4 bottles at a time and refrigerate them then heat them up in the microwave. Alternatively can you afford a perfect prep machine? My sister had one and it looked great.