How do I stop?!

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DS is nearly 8 months and has been ebf from the day he was born. Couldn't bf his older siblings due to some health issues I had so I really had to try this time and have managed to make it further than I thought. But I feel it's time to stop ebf and get him on a bottle or just stop altogether and formula in a bottle. He is an extreme bottle refuser and I also don't know ow how to stop or what to do. I come from a family of ff so nobody has advice. Thank you

Why not ring your health visitor and see what she advises?

Bit anxious about that because in the past they've been very judgemental when I've expressed feelings of finding it difficult to bf.

I had an extreme bottle refuser and I had to stop breastfeeding for my own health at 10 months. I had to stop cold turkey which was pretty brutal. I was in hospital and my daughter was sent home to dad she went 26h without a drink of milk! He managed to get just enough in her through food to stop her being dehydrated.

Would they accept a cup instead of a bottle?

My daughters bottle aversions was on and off, another time I managed to get back on the bottle by offering an Oz of breastmilk after each day time feeds. It took a few days but she started to associate the bottle with food and accept the bottle

By 9.5 months, my baby was on 3 meals a day, reliably. Paedetrician advised it was OK to stop BF in the day (I was back at work and pumping was killing me). That gave me such freedom. He's 11 months now and I am still breastfeeding - twice in the morning, once in the afternoon and then evening and night time. So no faffing with bottles, i can leave for the day with no worries, but also didn't need to switch to formula which would have been a pain at this age.

I think you are very close to it being super easy.

If you can't take it anymore (I do have days when I feel really touched out), I think formula in a cup is your answer.

Remove one feed at a time so you don't get mastitis. So for example, give up the mid morning feed and after 4-5 days, the lunch time feed, and so on. Don't stop suddenly.

I am sorry to hear that - this is absolutely not how they should be.

Will he suck your finger if you put it in his mouth (washed - before the germ brigade descend!)? - it might be possible to slip in a teat when he is sucking your finger.

@Superscientist aww glad your DD was okay in the end! Thank you for the tip about gradually exposure will surely try it !

@BackThen8878 okay that feels reassuring!! I don't think I'm at breaking point or anything because it's been an easy journey but recently I'm not sure what's happened but I got mastitis which is apparently uncommon when you have an older baby. Once that was over DS started a phase of feeding upto 12 times a night (every hour maybe more sometimes) And I loved every minute of bf up untill this point but it's getting hard. He's not a great eater either but I will hang in there and offer more foods thank you. 🌻

@Mischance he can suck a teat as he grabs his sisters old milk bottles (she uses them for her dolls) haha and he sucks on them like no tomorrow but once I pop milk in a bottle it's a no, he looks at me very disgusted!! Haha

I saw a lactation consultant at 7.5 months as I got mastitis when i started pumping. She said it's very common to get mastitis when weaning as the demand for milk can be all over the place. It's really horrible, I can see how it makes you doubt whether you can carry on!

@BackThen8878 oh my god that makes total sense!! He was feeding two hourly witbout fail before weaning. Now it's just random!

I’m sorry to add this - but you might be right in not trusting HVs on this.

I asked for help stopping feeding at 18 months, as it was desperately painful for me, and just got told that it was advised to keep feeding until 2.

Anyhoo…. With DD2, I stopped shortly before 1 by consistently giving her a bottle at the same time every day. To begin with there was a lot of wasted milk, but eventually she accepted that. Then it was a case of swapping one BF for a bottle every couple of days until I was done.

Good idea will start introducing a bottle every day. Not bothered about wasted formula as I'm in alot of pain sometimes. Thank you for the advice!!

Does he need it to be in a bottle? I think you’re meant to stop using them at one so I don’t know if I’d bother trying to teach him it at this point. At that age dd was very excited about having her own cup with a straw, could you try milk that way? Or just an open cup for now to get him used to the taste.

Was this with formula or breastmilk? Ie is the bottle or the formula he's rejecting?

Would you be willing to try pumping to make bottles in the short term before phasing in formula slowly? (Ie mixing breast milk and formula in reducing ratios). Understand if not because it's probably a right faff, particularly at a point in their lives when bf starts reducing anyway.

Alternatively, I'd try continuing bf, but also pump when needed to relieve the pressure and feel comfortable. I found this phase lasted no longer than 3/4 weeks then my boobs got used to the smaller more erratic feeds. And soon after it was smaller more regular feeds

@Tinseltotties no doesn't have to be a bottle, he can drink from a straw already!! Loves water in his straw sippy cup but refuses formula or breastmilk...

@MaJoady I've tried both but mainly breastmilk as I've loads in the freezer. To be honest after this thread I'm feeling abit more encouraged to ride it out and let it come to an end more naturally xx

@Tinseltotties no doesn't have to be a bottle, he can drink from a straw already!! Loves water in his straw sippy cup but refuses formula or breastmilk...

@MaJoady I've tried both but mainly breastmilk as I've loads in the freezer. To be honest after this thread I'm feeling abit more encouraged to ride it out and let it come to an end more naturally ❤️

Speak to your HV, ignore other’s opinions on how you use or not use your boobs.
I breastfed mine for 18 months because I chose so. During Covid help was a bit restricted , and everyone seem to have an opinion over my milk makers. A student HV told me: “baby’s health is as important as your mental wellbeing and how you want to continue this journey. Regardless how YOU choose to feed him now, he’ll be eating crackers from the car seat crevices in two years.”

id try to wean baby, offering boob one time less per day, and if possible asking someone to give bottle (because let’s face it…we’re just warm, cuddly creatures with nipples for them)
Mine refused bottle to start with , and I couldn’t express enough…but by the time I wanted to wean him, was already prepared for cows milk

Good luck, regardless what you do, is the right thing to do!

DS was a bottle refuser, regardless of content. I went back to work when he was 6 months (20 years ago) and he just had yoghurts instead of feeds during the day and I fed morning and evening. Nursery did stress about it but he was a year old before he’d finally drink out of a sippy cup. He thrived and is 6’ 2”.

Update for anyone interested. I found a bottle that works finally. It's a supermarket own brand and nipple shaped !! He took to it extremely well and even preferred it to boob sometimes. I'm currently mixed feeding ❤️