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Thinking of phoning social services on myself?..

9 replies

Bambamxx · 10/07/2025 04:11

Hi all ,

long story short I have 2 DD’s (9 and 6) and a 2mo DS. I have a partner (both DDS from my previous relationship) who works 2 long hour jobs. One being a night shift and the other a day job. So as you can imagine my days are long and lonely once DDs are at school. Last night eldest DD had a melt down to DP, kicking and screaming at him which then broke out into an argument between the two of us. Eldest daughter still crying and screaming and DS crying was going right through me who had been crying on and off all day, I reached breaking point and had some sort of breakdown unable to cope with my emotions , self harmed and felt this overwhelming urge to run out of the house and leave.

little things have probably pushed me to this point as DS isn’t a very content / happy baby and cries lots since first jabs last Fri… lack of sleep and support, eldest DD behaviour and acting up, youngest DD not getting enough attention from me due to the other 2 and their different needs etc .

i just physically cannot cope and found myself last night googling things I never thought I’d look at like “can SS voluntary take my children if I ask?” I’m at such a low point here, I don’t know what to do or who to contact and what would happen if I did contact SS to tell them I can’t cope… it’s all too much for me atm.

lastly I do have mh problems and under perinatal mht due to long standing depression, anxiety and bpd so mh isn’t a new thing for me. Please tell me this gets better….

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
BlackCoffeeAndSugar · 10/07/2025 04:17

Phone mht when they open inappropriate few hours.

Are kids at school?

Could also try your GP. You need some more support and without knowing what's avaliable in your area that's hard but your local team should know and be able to get you help

PersephonePomegranate · 10/07/2025 05:25

You obviously need urgent help.

eldest DD behaviour and acting up, youngest DD not getting enough attention from me due to the other 2 and their different needs etc

Eldest DD has had her life turned upside-down. She didn't ask for a stepdad or new baby in her space or diverting your attentions. None of this is their fault.

TaupeMember · 10/07/2025 06:12

PersephonePomegranate · 10/07/2025 05:25

You obviously need urgent help.

eldest DD behaviour and acting up, youngest DD not getting enough attention from me due to the other 2 and their different needs etc

Eldest DD has had her life turned upside-down. She didn't ask for a stepdad or new baby in her space or diverting your attentions. None of this is their fault.

Edited

Nobody's at fault here, least of all the op. She's just struggling like lots of us do with young children.

What a horrible and unhelpful post.

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TaupeMember · 10/07/2025 06:16

Op, I know what its like to have a very fussy baby.

Reach out for help once office hours start. Have you got any family or friends who can help? If not, GP or mental health services.

You aren't a bad person for feeling like this, and are far from alone. Young children are not easy and you're still in the post partum phase, your hormones will be all over the place, and suffering with broken sleep.

Does your oh need to work two jobs, that sounds like your biggest problem. You need more company at home. Being on your own day and night with three children isn't ideal.

Hang in there and get through each day, it will gradually get easier.

Secretsquirels · 10/07/2025 06:17

I think that you need a bit of a break and some adult company!

Do you have any friends or family who could come over in the daytime and spend some time with you?

Once the kids are at school today, take a look at home start.

They’re a charity and can organise for someone to come to your house once a week to help out. They’ll do things like hold the baby so you can focus on your eldest, or play with the eldest so that you can have some time with the middle one. Or they could come in the day and help out so that you get a break.

Landlubber2019 · 10/07/2025 06:28

@Secretsquirels nailed it... you need adult support. Homestart are fantastic and will offer some respite xxx

Good luck 👍

PersephonePomegranate · 10/07/2025 08:04

TaupeMember · 10/07/2025 06:12

Nobody's at fault here, least of all the op. She's just struggling like lots of us do with young children.

What a horrible and unhelpful post.

Where did I say OP was at fault? Im just trying to point out that her DD isn't just 'acting up' for no reason and shouldnt be blamed for a situation completely out of her control.

Kchs232 · 11/07/2025 08:01

Do you have any family support? Sibling? Parent? MIL? Anyone who could help you out for awhile? Could your eldest go and stay with their dad or their dads family for a few weeks in the summer?

Ilovethewild · 11/07/2025 08:10

Op, yr partner needs to know how you are feeling and help.
i agree that other support for you would be good, parent groups, mental health groups, chat and tea groups etc. but primarily your partner needs to step up for you and help you.

gp is a good starting point for help but health visitor may be good too

dont struggle alone

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