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WWYD - help re nursery / key person

3 replies

Keepingbusyeating · 08/07/2025 10:39

My (only just) 2 y/o DD has moved to a new room in nursery. They move them up by age so she’s been there for just a couple of weeks now.

She really benefited in the last rooms from building a close bond with her key person - when she moved into her last room (this is her 2nd move) it was hard - as expected - but the key person was really helpful and supportive, spent time with DD and I felt she really cared for her and her feelings.

She has been very upset each morning in this new room with each goodbye. It’s really hard - she is devastated! Clinging to me, crying no mummy no mummy, etc.

My issue is that her key person hasn’t once come to offer support in the mornings, a couple of the other staff do but never her key person. He doesn’t even say good morning to her when we enter the room. Knowing how upset she is, I’d have really hoped he’d be supporting her - toddlers are all individual and some need more support than others… surely they know that? He doesn’t give us updates on her day when we collect her like other parents get, other staff sometimes update us but never him.

My DD is very spirited and energetic, he’s called her bossy before to me (she is bossy and I wouldn’t have minded if it was said in an endearing way) but I wonder if he just doesn’t like her… but maybe I’m being a bit PFB?

I was thinking this week of approaching him and asking how her day has been at the end of each day as he seems to stay away when I collect her, and see how that goes, maybe asking if he is still her key person as it isn’t clear if it is him anymore… but I find this sort of thing SO uncomfortable, so wondering what other opinions are?

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Shesellsseashellsnotinmystreet · 08/07/2025 11:01

If the key worker is new he won't be allowed to engage with dps yet.. My dd works in a nursery and had to be there so long before she could do drop offs and collections and engage with the dps... She has her own key dc now and is fully trained in all areas of the job and the schedule..

Keepingbusyeating · 08/07/2025 11:22

Shesellsseashellsnotinmystreet · 08/07/2025 11:01

If the key worker is new he won't be allowed to engage with dps yet.. My dd works in a nursery and had to be there so long before she could do drop offs and collections and engage with the dps... She has her own key dc now and is fully trained in all areas of the job and the schedule..

Ah ok - although he is the ‘room leader’ and has been there a while as far as I know, definitely not new. Greets and is more involved with other children who arrive / leave just not my DD it seems

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BumpedmyElbow · 08/07/2025 14:36

I would approach him and say you'd like to meet with him as her keyworker to devise a collaborative plan to support her transition into the new room as she is struggling. That is completely reasonable, not unduly critical and the meeting should give you the chance to assess the accuracy of your spidey senses that he is not a good match for your child.

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