33 weeks pregnant and struggling in every way

[TheTiredMoz]

I am 33 weeks pregnant with my second. My DS is 2 yrs 8 months. I loved being pregnant first time round but I have been exhausted this whole pregnancy. There was no second trimester relief.

Work has been full on the whole pregnancy too.

As a result, my husband has done a lot with our DS. And now DS just doesn’t want me. I can’t do bedtimes because he won’t settle. If he hurts himself he asks for daddy. I’m too tired to be any fun so I can’t blame him.

We then found out some complications with the pregnancy and I feel like it’s my fault. I’ve failed.

I have also had a non pregnancy related health scare and am waiting to hear back from an urgent screening.

Work then all got unbearable (I work full time in an high stress job) and so I’ve been signed off for stress. I felt like work was all I was good at so now I’m a failure on that too. Worried I’ve burnt bridges and won’t be able to come back after maternity leave.

Amongst all this I feel so unprepared for the new baby. Nothing is ready. We aren’t financially as strong as I had hoped we would be.

I am not sure on the point of this post. All that’s getting me through is the thought of meeting my DD and hoping to not fail that relationship like I have with my son.

I suppose I just need reassurance that it’s not just me that can’t cope with it all.

Aww OP I hear you, the third trimester is really tough. I’m also 33 weeks and also exhausted, but it sounds like you have a lot going on all once, no wonder you’re shattered! On a practical level, have you had your iron levels checked recently?

I know it’s hard but try not worry about your DS - it’s really normal for toddlers to go phases of favouring one parent over another and for these to change over time.

Re work - just put it out of your mind and cross that bridge later when you have more energy. Your health is much more important right now for both you and your baby - your doctor has signed you off for a reason, so make the most of the opportunity to not have to think about that atm and just concentrate on you.

Try to maximise rest wherever you can and remember pregnancy is the physiological equivalent of running a daily marathon - you’re doing a great job of something really physically challenging and it’s really not long to go now. All the best 💐

Sorry you’re having such a hard time

just wanted to provide some reassurance that my DS also became a daddy’s boy towards end of my difficult pregnancy with DC2 and after they were born for a while also. Didn’t want me for bed time. And even if they very occasional did want me they literally couldn’t fall asleep with me and in end would ask for daddy. Broke my heart and I thought would never go back. I read threads saying it would be fine but didn’t believe it, but it’s absolutely fine now, I’m absolutely top dog again and the two kids fight over who gets me for bedtime every night.
it’s just a really hard phase.

work wise, it will all be forgotten too in time. Half the staff had left by time I got back after mat leave each time anyway

Thank you both so much for your replies. It is so reassuring to hear.

Many times, pregnancy is not about coping, it is about survival. You will survive this and come out the other side. Your child with have a sibling to go through life with, you will have your health and energy back and the strains will fade.

It feels like it will never end. It is so hard and I really feel for you.