Reading - stubborn 7 year old

[Franny1]

Has anyone come across a younger child not reading for pleasure out of stubbornness/trying to be different from a sibling?! My 7 year old DD is an excellent reader and school says she loves English there and is really good at it. But at home she refuses to pick up a book for independent reading, and also sometimes says she hates English! (She likes being read to at bedtime.)

I thought maybe she was just struggling to find it pleasurable because it feels too hard, but she does seem extremely capable when we read together and recently I’ve wondered if she’s actually just trying to differentiate herself from her older brother! He has had a bit of an amazing year where he’s morphed into a real bookworm and also won a prestigious writing competition (and a few other things,). I can imagine from his sister’s perspective it might feel like a lot to live up to, and she has always had a real stubborn streak (when she was a baby she actually had something called a feeding aversion where she wouldn’t feed if it was offered to her too much!). Just wondering if she feels a strong desire to mark herself out somehow, and if so what I can do about it. (Particularly given that I suspect she would actually love reading - she loves stories being read to her!)

Anyone come across this?

Wanted to add- when I say she won’t read anything I mean even Dog Mans etc. Most of her friends read something for pleasure now, ranging from comics to Enid Blytons

Both of mine wouldn’t read at this age, one was really adamant that they hated reading. I’m pleased to report tgat we share books now tgat they’re an adult

My advice would be read yourself and if there is another adult around see if they will read too. DC do love to copy.

The other thing I would di is not to rise to it when she says that she doesn’t want to read., almost as if she hasn’t spoken.

Don’t forget too that anything can be counted as reading. When DS was at his worst I would plonk the cereal box near him as he ate breakfast and often after a minute or two he would start reading tge box. I also started buying him a football magazine which he loved.

Love this answer, thank you! I was expecting answers along the lines of “well some kids just aren’t readers” but I know from my experience with my son sometimes it just takes a while (although he was never adamantly against) and also I just feel in my gut that’s not the case here.

can I ask when your kids shifted?

I’m not sure. I blithely ignored all protests for ages and suddenly they started moving on from cereal packets and the Beano.

I think with DS it was when I stated reading George’s Secret Key to the Universe to him. DD was different and I ended up showing her the dyslexia friendly books at out local library whilst her older Brother was choosing some books. Obviously o didn’t mention they were a bit different though.

My daughter is an excellent reader. Loved it in reception and half way through year one and then went completely off it. Basically the chapter books were too old for her and she missed pictures....so almost got ahead of herself too quickly and barely read at home for a year or 2. Anyway, she's 9 now and is back into reading. Lottie Brooks books and Jacqueline Wilson are her faves. She's always been ahead with it at school, just didn't do it for fun for a while.

Could it be that she just hasn't found something that doesn't make it feel like a chore? DD has not long turned 6 and has just started reading some chapter books. However we read them together last year and they have pictures in so are easy enough for her to follow. Think they are aged 5-8 so very suitable at the moment. Sometimes she switches and reads none fiction on the things that interest her at the moment. She also has some National Geographic kids magazines that she dips into.

One of mine was like this - loved being read to but v rarely picked up a book. He’s now an adult and every now and then someone will gift him a sports book and he’ll read it and that’s it. Ironically he has a job now where he has to read or research a load of information and present it to others in an easier to read format (graphs/pie charts etc).

My elder child was a bookworm too and like you I did wonder if there was an element of trying to differentiate himself from his sister!

in the end you can’t force it - the fact that she reads well and likes being read to is great. It may just be that it all clicks later (or never!).