Is my son behind and is it my fault?

[FTsammaz]

Hi everyone

I am FTM of a nearly 18 month old. My son didn’t crawl until about 2 months ago and has recently started pulling up, crushing and climbing I think he will walk soon, I am not so worried about this but highlighting it for the sake of what I’m going on to say in terms of him being behind others. I have been reading about speech as my friend has a child the same age who walked very quickly and is saying many words. My son makes lots of noise and babbles but the only words he says are ‘yes’ ‘no’ and ‘wow’ he also makes a lion noise when reading his favourite book. I’m worried that I have caused him to be behind with his speech by not specifically teaching him words, of course I speak to him all the time but not in the sense of when I give him his dinner I don’t name all the foods, I don’t teach him the names of toys etc. I don’t know why I haven’t done this it just didn’t really occur to me (which sounds so obvious now I’m typing it!). From others experience will he catch up and should I start to do these things now? Any other tips welcome. Thank you

All kids do things at different rates and you shouldn't compare. My mam constantly goes on about what an early speaker I was compared to x,y,z. However I turned out to be pretty average and the others overtook me! Keep talking away to him. And yes, maybe words will help but you're naturally doing that anyway. You're doing a great job!

No. You have done nothing wrong! Please don’t do this to yourself. The first time my eldest said mummy was the day before he went to pre school. He was 21/2. He then went on to be accepted into a highly competitive grammar school - even though he ended up not going there. He’s only 18 months. Keep chatting to him reading with him. It will come. By all means show him those books with words and pictures as well. But don’t sit there and for one minute think he won’t catch up. You’re doing great mama. Keep going.

Babies don’t need to be taught words like a lesson but they do need to hear lots of words. Talk to your baby about everyday life - describe the dinner and the laundry and the bus. Read books with him. And it will be fine.

You don’t need to teach them words like that. He’ll pick it all up in the end. My youngest was slow with everything as a baby, walking, talking, eating, everything. He very much still like a baby at 18 months and not a toddler. He’s now 8, bright, funny and no development issues at all.

I am only naming things for my LO because they point at stuff all the time.

In the walking front - it sounds like everything is going the right way, late walking isn't a problem if they do get going eventually and 18 months isn't even especially late.

I saw this lady yesterday talk to her little one in the park- she’d spread out a blanket nearby to us and had a load of foods on it- literally it was a constant ‘would you like some bread Theo? What kind of bread is this? Is it chewy? It has grains on it doesn’t it. And what do we have on the bread? Hummus. That’s hummus. Can you say hummus? What colour is that? Mmm it’s smooth isn’t it. Shall we put a carrot on your plate? Look, a crunchy orange carrot. Let’s have 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 carrot sticks! Mummy is going to bite her carrot stick now, bite your carrot stick Theo, isn’t it tasty? Look, we have fruit too, what fruit do we have here? RED STRAWBERRIES! Aren’t they juicy? Try a juicy red strawberry!’ And on, and on. Poor kid only looked about 15 months or so and was just getting bombarded and overwhelmed with vocab when he looked like he just wanted to enjoy his lunch 😩😂 I used to talk to mine all the time too but a lot of it is natural, general sort of conversation rather than turning everything into an intense learning opportunity.

Just keep talking away to yours but not everything has to be hyper focused, he’ll get there .

Just talk. Talk all the time.

Awwww this sounds great! Lucky kid out for a picnic, lots of yummy food, engaged parent.

Just narrate your day OP. Talk to baby about anything and everything. They'll get there.

Just talk to them normally and read to them lots too. Kids develop at different rates and it’s usually not down to the parenting. Some catch up in their own time and others might have a reason for the delay. I didn’t say a word until I was 2.5 years old but was a high achiever academically through school (not so much now). My daughter is delayed physically and I always wondered if it was anything I did but it turns out she has low muscle tone and hypermobility which are probably genetic.

No, my point was it was too much- probably exhausting for both of them to keep up that commentary constantly. That’s just a snippet. She didn’t pause for breath. A good bit of natural conversation and vocab is obviously great, but you have to let them take it in!!

Yep.
This.

Narrating what you do is the easiest way which is why you see so many mums doing it on autopilot all the sodding time annoying even themselves (describing myself here)

Singing is great too. Nursery rhymes, repetition of actions in songs. I read nightly to mine without fail and have done since he was weeks old.