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Parenting

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Social services and postnatal depression

3 replies

Copenhagener · 19/06/2025 09:13

I’ll keep this short.

I had an awful time immediately postpartum and wasn’t supported by the health visitor, doctors, or midwives, despite begging for help at the time - literally from the first hour after my baby was born.

I eventually was taken seriously around 3 months postpartum, but the help didn’t work. CBT didn’t help, anti-anxieties don’t touch me.

I had a crying bout at the GP last week because I was scared about my daughter’s health and they wouldn’t do a swab to check for infection. Please bear in mind my baby nearly died after being released from hospital after her birth despite me begging them to take a closer look at her - she ended up in NICU on breathing help and with a feeding tube - so I’m very scared of not being taken seriously now. This time, she ended up actually having Influenza B and needing antibiotics, so I feel somewhat justified for being worried and trying to advocate properly for her this time.

The GP alerted social services and sent me to a psychiatric unit for evaluation, who said I wasn’t psychotic and said they couldn’t help and discharged me.

I’m finding the situation with social services horrendous. They keep saying they’ll ‘help’ but they’ve not been clear what that looks like. Only that they think I’m traumatised - but so far they’ve done nothing about that.

They only communicate via my partner, have come to my home for 10 minutes then left, then made me visit them yesterday for 15 minutes, given no further information except ‘they’ll look into help and draft a report.’ They haven’t told me what they’re worried about exactly, but they have said they’re not concerned about abuse or neglect, but that a child shouldn’t grow up with a depressed parent. I cook, clean, take her to baby classes and her development is fine. I just get really scared going to hospitals and the doctor because of what happened when she was born.

I’ve messaged my health visitor twice but she’s not replied.

I wish I’d never asked for depression help. I suppose this is a warning that admitting you’re sad CAN lead to social services intervening. I’ve tried over the past 6 months to do the right things and get better, and now I’m being punished for being sad.

I’m tempted to leave my baby with my partner and move out, as I can’t cope with the monitoring and the implication I’m a terrible mother.

Has anyone been in a similar situation who can share some experiences?

OP posts:
OvergrownHaha · 19/06/2025 13:15

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daff0di1 · 19/06/2025 14:01

I don't have experience sorry, but I'm pretty certain social services wouldn't remove a baby due to depression alone, as long as baby is looked after. Hopefully you can get the support you need, leaving your baby doesn't seem the best option and wouldn't look great, baby still needs you x

Mrsttcno1 · 19/06/2025 14:07

For anyone reading this who is suffering with PPD and scared to seek help- social services will not be involved purely and simply due to PPD. It’s very common, 1 in 10 women suffer, believe me when I say social services are not involved in all of those cases.

It sounds far beyond this OP, I’ve cried in the GP and never been sent for a psych eval- the bar is very high. If you’re genuinely considering leaving your child then your need for help is far more severe than just “being sad”.

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