Matrescence, anyone heard of it?

[Mensuckbigtime]

Hey everyone
Not sure this is the right place to post this.
Has anyone heard of the term matrescence?
I read a book on it and it completely blew away mind.
I'm a mother to two DDs and I'd never ever heard of the term.
The book made me laugh and cry at equal measures.
It felt like the author was talking about my experience if becoming a mother.

Matrescence refers to the the psychological, emotional, physical and structural (also brain changes) that a woman goes through when she becomes a mother.

Matrescence relates to adolescence, as it matrescence is believe to have a similar impact in a woman as adolescence does during puberty.

Has anyone heard of the term?

Highly recommend.the book, it's eye opening..and shocking that matrescence is still a fairly "new" subject (eventhough quite few.pieple on this planet will experience matrescence)

Just thought I'd post if anyone else feels that becoming a mother has been a massive if not the BIGGEST change ever

Matrescence by Lucy Jones

Yes, I have heard of it. I think it's a brilliant theory and it's good to have those experiences seriously researched.

Just adding that no, I will never be the same again. I could feel DS's personality while I carried him, it was an incredible experience. It sounds as though yours was similarly intense and wonderful. I do hope so!

Yes I’ve heard of it, I think it’s a really valuable concept to help make sense of what new mothers go through. I also think it’s the tousle of transitioning from woman to mother that can cause a lot of MIL friction as per MN threads!

I've never heard of the term. I do feel like I radically changed when I became a mother but I just laid it at the feet of newly found humility at not being able being able to control everything around me anymore. Off to google.

Honestly, read up on it ladies.

It's likesomeone "gets" you

And also, why is NOONE talking about this???

Becoming a mother is the biggest shift and challenge in my life and the constant insta posts on how to be a better mother are getting to me...

According to the book, researcher can tell.by looking at brain scans if someone has has a child or not with 96%accuracy even 6 years after birth

Also, there is this concept of microchimerism (I think that's how it's spelt), whereby there is an exchange between foetal cells and mothers cells.
So for any second born, you're probably carrying your older siblings cells in you. And also, for those of us who have miscarried (I have), our unborn babies cells are probably still within us (for me, this is a beautiful thought)

Get reading, let's educate ourselves about what's been happening to us and with us!!!
FYI I am NOT the author of the book
😉

hi Mensuckbigtime. have been trying to find someone who has read the book to ask is it purely about women who give birth ? or is there any insight to for example, adoptive mothers as well ? sounds fascinating !

From what I understood everyone who is an immediate attachment figure to a child will go through some sort of matrescence, obviously maybe not as intense as a mother who gives.birth, but nonetheless. So yes, I'm sure most applies to adoptive parents too.

I once watched a documentary on same sex couples (gay in that instance), the father who wakes up with the baby to give bottles and takes on the nurturing/caring role will have similar oxytocin levels as a breast/bottle feeding mother

Also an important I sight of the book, the "mother instinct" doesn't exist, not all of us are able to conceive a child and give birth to it, but anyone with close connection/caring role will go through similar changes as a mother going through mateescence.

Father's go through something similar but maybe not with the same force and with some time delay

Yes, Mensuck, I have heard of this too. We are permanently, neurologically changed by the child and not simply by their existence , but potentially their whole personality. Looking back, when I was pregnant with each of my children, I felt different each time, and in hindsight, it was their personalities. Farfetched, I know, but my experience.

There is also a theory that everyone who comes into contact with the child will exchange cells by osmosis. We have a proven, physical impact on each other. I think it is amazing.

I will stop hijacking your thread now! 🙂

I have heard of this and I teach university students about it! So hopefully word is spreading. I must admit I’ve not read the book though (have read other stuff on it, it originated from anthropological work as you probably know). The students found it really interesting I think.

Internally through microchimerism. If you carry a child in your womb, even if you miscarry, there will.most.likely be an exhance of cells.
I read an article where they found XY thyroid cells in a woman who had given birth to a son. The mother will carry her children's cells throughout her body and pass these on to subsequent children.

I have an older brother, it's a lovely thought to think that his cells are within me because we spent 10.months in the same womb

Go.for it, I.love it!!!

The more we talk.about it, the better

By osmosis? How does that work? Wouldn’t they need to exchange body fluids?

it sounds strange to me. I never got the whole spiritual experience of motherhood thing. I remember the responsibility when they were born, that was my overwhelming sense.

Ooh, that sounds really cool , can I ask what your course is called (or too outing)

I don't live in thr UK, but where I'm from (remember the EU), the concept is barely known and I want to change that!

thanks. that reflects my own journey of adoptive motherhood. interesting

You're a mama, whether you gave birth or not. Matrescence doesn't start with conception and doesn't end with giving birth..it's a process and you're going through it with uour child ad their mum

Sounds fascinating!

Whatsgoingon, I really don't know. As I remember it, simply by being around the baby, it can happen. Something to do with neurology. I might have chosen the wrong word, but it's to do with close contact with the child, even by being in the same room. Bizarre, I know, but it's an interesting theory. It might have been connected with collective unconscious or something like that.

It was mindblowing anyway!

I’ve read the book OP and thought it was brilliant and thought provoking. It really nails they way you feel deconstructed as a person and reconstructed as a parent. It seems there are real parallels between adolescence, matrescence and then menopause - massive brain and other physical changes each time. It’s fascinating, and I agree, there should be more acknowledgment of what women go through physically and psychologically.

I got the book for Christmas. I need to finish it.

I read that book in the early weeks after my second child and thought it was amazing, as you say it's just like someone taking about my experience. I think every mother/mother to be should read it and I have been buying a copy for any of my friends who are expecting. It really reframes everything in a way that I haven't read anywhere else or that people don't seem to talk about--excellent.

Hi, yes I've heard of it! I'm the founder of Mothers Uncovered, have a dedicated website www.matrescence.uk and have been advocating for the last few years, I'm interviewed in Lucy's book and wrote a post about it on here https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/guest_posts/4871946-guest-post-if-matrescence-were-given-as-much-significance-as-adolescence-then-not-only-would-mothers-realise-the-importance-of-their-work-others-would-too.