How do you discipline your child?

[zippidydodaa]

Just that really? What are the consequences for actions? What if there is no learning of lessons? Do you shout? Confiscate possessions? Increase chores?

looking mainly for opinions from those who have children around age 12

Also what do you consider is taking discipline too far? Would you ask your child if they are retarded? Would you tell them that you are disappointed? Would you get a spoon and ask them if they wanted to be hit with it?

Thanks

Um…

Are you working through some issues from your own childhood?

You know the answers to your question.

No to all of those things.

I’m not draconian, nor a thug.

What is with these oddly framed questions? 🙄

Just give the true context - did this happen to you as a child, or is your partner acting like that as a parent?

I'd rather not go into personal circs that's not the purpose of it (I think). I just wanted an idea on how people 'discipline' their children. Perhaps shouldn't have phrased in the way that I did but too late now.

Ok, well I think the examples above (asking your child if they’re retarded and threatening to hit them with an object) is outright abuse.

Telling them you’re disappointed depends on the context. Disappointed in their behaviour, that’s normal. Disappointed they’re alive, no.

Surely you know that the examples you’ve given aren’t discipline, they’re abuse.

Do you shout? Confiscate possessions? Increase chores?

That's all normal, maybe not best p, but normal.
Hitting, insults and threats are likely to damage your relationship and therefore counterproductive even outside of the long term effects on the child. Likely to indicate that the adult needs further support.

If you're trying to be the gentle parent and always use natural consequences rather than imposing rules and order then that's also likely to cause issues. So there's a fine line and it's hard to hit it.
Are the children involved under any kind of SEN support as that's a good avenue to get more specific advice.