At what age do kids expect a party?

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My DD is coming up to 3 and we are thinking of just having a family day for her birthday, either going to the zoo or out for pizza/ice cream. Most of the others in our NCT group are having parties and just wondering at what age DD will expect a party too? Other than not knowing how to organise one we don’t really have anyone to invite. We only see the NCT group occasionally so DD doesn’t really know the other children and several have moved away recently anyway. She goes to nursery and says she has friends although she is often playing by herself when I pick her up and not sure whether they are really classed as friendships yet. I don’t know the other parents except to say hello at dropoff and we don’t know of any others having birthday parties for nursery friends yet. No other friends with kids and only one family member close by so can’t have a family party either. It is terrible to wait until she is in school and whole class parties are more common?

They really started for 4th birthdays at our nursery.

I think a small number had 3rd birthday parties, we didn't.

When they’re in reception and see others having birthday parties.

My dd was very aware of parties and really wanted her own from around 2.5. You might get away with it for longer though is yours isn’t aware of parties yet.

I think - expect - when they are in reception so 5th birthday. But maybe it's area specific. I have two DC went to one party when they were at nursery for a 4 year old. But several when they started school.

They started at 4 for mine but that was at school nursery so you knew the other parents as drop/pick was the same time for everyone and the group of kids would mostly be their class cohort up until finishing primary school. If we’d stayed at day nursery I probably wouldn’t have bothered until reception. At 3 there’s definitely no need if you don’t want to.

First party was their 5th birthday - prior to that we had a family day out to celebrate.

My kids wanted one in reception and it was a good way to make friends at school. They both had one in reception and year 1 and after that they chose a day out with us and a couple of friends.

Reception age in my experience. Anything before then and the novelty of a day out or special treat is just as exciting. We went to a few nursery parties but they were the exception rather than the expectation.

It depends what their friends do, I think.

Our son is the oldest in his nursery class, so none of his friends had had birthdays before him. His cousin did have a party and he expected one after that, but there’s only 6 weeks between them so we had to disappoint him. Now that several nursery friends have had parties later in the year, he is miffed he didn’t have one.

And he is very, very excited to have a party for his 4th birthday. We don’t know the parents of many of his nursery friends, but our nursery will put the invites in their bags or send them via email/app.

Reception and a few children not until they were asking for their 7th birthday. We did a 3rd party because lockdown restrictions eased and we were keen to celebrate and see how she is with other children, as we were allowed into the nursery under a few months before her birthday.

another vote for 4-5.

I've been to two 3 year old parties this year, and to be honest, I think it is too young. The kids had fun in places, but were also frustrated and sometimes struggled with the 'party' procedures/games/atmosphere.

Would that child have been happier with just their family, or a few friends? probably.

But then, it does depend on the Child. Birthdays should be about making them feel special. Some children feel that way when surrounded by a huge group of other kids, but other children would rather just have the full attention of their parents, an amazing day out, etc. and don't thrive in a big party group.

Id say once they start school, before school we did a combination of small little tea parties with a few family/friends and/or day out - the whole class parties started for us when the kids starting turning 6 but was a year or so later than it probably would have been because of COVID. We're now reaching the end of those and back into the wanting a day out with a few friends or smaller parties again.

On our area it is 4 or when they get to school nursery. In my friends area where most stay at private nursery or CM until Reception starts its 5 when they get in reception. Whole class parties die off at yr 2 usually round us.

Yr 1 is when the invites started coming in thick and fast round here. We did do the bouncy castle/village hall type parties for DDs 3rd and 4th birthday but she was in full time nursery so there were lots of kids to invite.

It does also depend on the make up of your class and how many children are in the class. We've had quite a few class parties at 4 as we have lots and lots of children with older siblings so the younger ones are more aware of whole class parties. Whereas a friend in another town has a lot of first borns in her year group so there have been less parties in nursery at 4 and most are waiting until reception there.

Whole class parties for nursery have also dropped off as the class has got bigger through the year due to new starters that will be in the year below. The class started at 23 in September and is now at 40 (making whole class parties at most venues very expensive or prohibitive due to numbers). Since Christmas (when the class grew to 34) party invites have been very selective (girls/boys only/ next year's reception only).

Nursery parties have been a big thing for us. I’d say the majority had a party at 3 and virtually all at 4.

I’m not sure what will happen from 5 onwards as pretty much all from nursery are going to different schools so maybe huge parties with old nursery friends + new school friends!

I'd say 4 or 5 is when children start to understand what a birthday is
But birthdays dont need parties. Just a nice quiet day with presents and cake is nice enough

It depends on the culture at her nursery. DS1 was a bit younger than all his nursery friends and most of them had 3rd birthday parties, so he was expecting one too, and would have been quite surprised as well as upset if he hadn't had one. But if your DD's nursery friends haven't been having them, you can get away with not having one either. Unless you actually want to - I think they're popular at our nursery because the parents want to get to know each other. Many work together anyway, and some have relocated from outside of the area so they don't have existing networks of parent friends.

They started at the 4th birthday in our nursery. There is a Whatsapp class group which makes it easier - we did whole class parties and posted an invite to the group. DD was at a preschool nursery for her 3rd birthday but I didn't bother with a party as I didn't think it was worth it for those kids, she was just there for a year and then she'd be moving on. For school nursery and reception it's worth it as it can help support friendships which will last through primary.