Not the best, not the worst

[Boopdasnoot]

Are most people’s kids like mine? Hovering somewhere just above being a picky eater- not the best eater in the world, but not the worst?

What’s your approach? We just tick along like this and I don’t worry too much as he’s covering all the food groups and eating well enough… I think… New things are offered here and there. If we’re eating a meal I know he won’t like we usually give a spoonful of whatever it is on his plate and he will accept trying it. He’s discovered some new favourites this way but mostly he just tries it and then declines any more.

Do we just carry on as is and eventually he’ll expand his palette over time? He’s 4 years old and eats:

Rice Krispies
Egg & soldiers
Porridge
Bacon
Sausages
Pancakes
Toast & marmalade/jam/peanut butter
Cheese sandwiches/toasties
Fish fingers
Tuna pasta (occasionally)
Pesto pasta
Spaghetti bolognese
Lasagne
Most kinds of soup
Various fruit (strawberries, blueberries, apples, melon, dried fruits etc)
Humous with breadsticks/rice cakes
Yoghurt

He eats no veg whatsoever on its own but eats it no problem in soup or bolognese/lasagne. If he has a dinner of say fish fingers or a pasta dish, I give him a bowl of fruit salad on the side to make up for the lack of vegetables.

I think it’s a varied and balanced diet at four, I would cut out the bacon and sausage though as they are carcinogenic

Do you think? He has a bacon sandwich maybe once a month. We have a cooked breakfast once or twice a month so he also enjoys some bacon with his egg and toast. I didn’t think that was a problem. I’m not really keen to be cutting things from his diet when it’s already not the most varied.

I'd agree with you OP. It's not the best, not the worst. Even if people say it's terrible, what are you going to do? You can't force feed them. Cajoling, begging, bribing all generally thought to be a bad idea. Your job to control the what, when and where of eating, their job to decide whether to eat and how much. The only thing I would do differently is to make sure there is always a couple of different veg on the plate and try to accept the food waste when he doesn't eat them (though your comment about fruit salad on the side may be as well as not instead of veg).

It sounds fine to me and like you have a very healthy approach to food and eating.

At the end of the day you have no stress around mealtimes and a well fed, healthy four year old. What else do you need? Maybe you can't take him out for sushi yet, but really you're not in a bad situation at all.

Sounds like what my DS eats at 5 give or take. He's very open to trying new things but generally ends up not liking them. We've got him onto fruit now, too, but he won't eat veg except if it's hidden in mashed potato or shepherd's pie.

Not the best not the worst is exactly it. My 4YO is pretty similar, especially with the vegetable dodging. Will eat slightly more meals perhaps but wouldn’t touch soup so it’s much harder to sneak it in. I have the benefit of an 8YO though who was exactly the same at 4 but pretty much eats anything now so I’m really relaxed about it. And to @NuffSaidSam we take him out for sushi all the time- he just eats primarily the robata grill stuff and deconstructs some cucumber maki until it’s time for mochi 🤷‍♂️

This is exactly what I struggle with. The waste. If it’s something along with what we’re eating anyway then I don’t mind, but it is frustrating seeing things going in the bin. Agree with the no bribing or cajoling. I do know when he’s rushing dinner to have a yoghurt after and I’m firm on that, but other than that I just leave him to it.

My logical side agrees but I do sometimes think we’re not doing well at all. I usually manage to give myself a shake, especially when I see posts on here of parents genuinely struggling with picky eaters. He’s great in restaurants and we tend to take him places where we know we can get something he’ll enjoy. But yes no sushi for now!

It’s reassuring to hear others are the same. He will also try things so that’s a positive. But so far it hasn’t let to very many new foods. It’s such a slow journey it can be quite painful. I know it’s something like 20 tastes of something before they accept they like it but when you’re just getting through the days and getting them fed I don’t think to keep trying him over and over again with different food.

This will be what I’m lacking for perspective! The experience of an older child to see that it all comes good in the end. For now I need to remember that he’s doing well enough.

My 7 yr old eats a much bigger variety of food than at 4, so there's some more hope for you!

I hope this is the natural progression 🙏🏻 you know when they have quite a set and limited menu you worry that they’ll drop something and it’ll be even more limited