My dd still occasionally wakes and has more than one bottle through the night......

[posieparker]

I have another baby on the way and 2 older dss who never had to do controlled crying because they slept well after 3 months ALWAYS.
I think I should try controlled crying with dd as she wakes 4/7 nights and we give her milk or bring her into our bed. I know this is all terrible and never did this with my other children, but dd co-slept or didn't sleep for 8 months and screamed most of the time for her first eight months. My boys were 'perfect' sleepers and very very easy babies and so some may say I deserve her !!!!

Please help with alternatives to controlled crying or success stories of controlled crying. As my next baby is coming via elective caesarean dd1s night waking is not an option!!

PS She's 20 months. She has 9-14 oz milk to go to sleep and then another 6oz in the night when she wakes.

Is she getting enough solids? Since it sounds like she is definately hungry.

My DS is 1 year old and takes about 6oz of milk to bed. He has a full tea at 5pm consisting of a main meal, dessert and finger food. Some days he eats lots and other days not so much but he has never drunk that much milk since of the solid food.

They say another way to judge whether they are genuinely hungry at night, is how they takes breakfast. Is she still eager for her morning bottle annd her breakfast?

She eats with her older siblings who eat quickly and then get bored at the table and as they are made to stay she is distracted, maybe not enough solids. I have thought of that and keep promising I will address this.
She doesn't have a morning bottle and eats a good breakfast, she doen't walk always either (family of very late walkers!!).

You both make a lot of sense, just deciding dinner now.... we always have sandwiches style lunch!!

Both boys never woke in the night and stopped having a bottle for bed at 13 months!
I am at the point where the night waking needs to stop, I'm so worried that new baby will arive and she will feel really pushed out.

Reading about her when she was younger i wonder if she had acid reflux, only symptoms are screaming lots and not sleeping much at all! My dd had this and improved greatly at 6 months when they accepted their was a problem and gave her gaviscon. However she still struggled to sleep well at nights, I think her sleep pattern was ruined!!! In the end when she was 4 and she was still waking some nights 3 times up to 4 times per week we took her for cranial osteopathy - it really really improved things, she finds it easier to get to sleep and now wakes very very rarely at night.

I just wondered if knocking the milk on the head wold be easy if you ensured there wasn't another problem going on IYSWIM.

My others all slept through from 7 weeks, 4 months & 2 weeks............... (bf btw)

CarGirl, she was rather sick and is still a little sick when she laughs (like her brother who had a dairy intolerance, still a little sick at six when he laughs a lot). I hadn't thought of that. She had my breast in her mouth most of the time and so established snack likefeeding patterns too.... gosh all so bledding obvious now and she's my third!!!

Boys bf and slept.......... and never cried (never meaning a couple of time including injections in their first year, what a shock dd1 was!!)

DD still had at least one, if not more bottles during the night at that age. And after DS, who slept through at about 3 months it was a shock.

What we found worked was stopping using bottles. I can't remember exactly when it was, but before she was 2, we went and chose "big girl beakers" and virtually overnight the problem with having so much milk stopped. It took a little longer for the waking at night to stop, but she is 2.8 now and rarely wakes at night.

Mine was my third as well I was nearly suicidal by the time I went back to work to get away from her - she only slept 8 hours out of 24 and the rest of the time she screamed unless being held in a certain way. My fourth was a very easy baby and helped wipe out the horrendousness of it all tbh.

There was a big improvement after the first lot of cranial treatment and I think we had 3 or 4 treatments altoghether - just a thought! I think it's just stranges that sometime she sleeps through and other times not which is just like mine was at 1,2,3 until the treatment......

Turniphead, I know and I probably would give a friend the same advice... I never even rocked the boys to sleep as I knew they would rely on it, dd1 has made me eat so many words and judgements, it's like she was sent to prove the boys were just born like that and not due to my amazing parenting skills . Well Friday night's the night, must get that book!!

i sent my ds to bed with a cup of water and showed him where it was at this age so when he woke he could just feed himself and go back off

i did stop the milk in night sent him to bed with the milk and oput cup of water in with him also

also was given a tip to give slice of toast just before bed dont know why but it worked and still does maybe it lines there belly in feeling more content

I think CC is too much too soon, if she's relying on milk and cuddles during the night. Try and see it from your DD's point of view. Mmmmmmmm, milk, cuddles with mummy and daddy in a nice warm bed..........

Oh FUCK, what is going on?????????? No milk, no cuddles, all alone in the dark, it's horrible!

Cut out the milk, but cuddle her to sleep beside her own bed, in an upright position (so it's vaguely uncomfy). lay her down when she's sleepy. During the night, let her into your bed.

As the weeks go by, if she visits you in the night, take her back but stay with her.

Play it by ear from thereon. If you still feel the need to do CC, it won't be so traumatic for her.

We did this for DS1, and DH still falls asleep with him, but he sleeps through the night.

I'm about to try it for the third time with DS2. He's awful, wails for hours.

Highlander she goes to bed absolutely fine and she doesn't walk to us, she's in a cot!!

dash, I have another on the way who will undoubtably wake often through the night meaning dd1 will wake if she is still not used to settling herself.

PP: as others have said, I imagine at 20 months she's not waking up and demanding a bottle because she's hungry or thirsty but simple because she needs it to settle herself back to sleep. Instead of going all-out cold turkey, could you start diluting the milk and reducing the quantity - I guess it's what you do with younger children (well, what we did with DD) so it slowly phases it out. It's clearly not going to be the answer in itself, but may wean her off her perceived need for a bottle of lovely milk.

Thank you everyone, Friday night's the night!!!