To parent a toddler in London or the suburbs/rural

[newmumabouttown]

I keep flitting between feeling I SHOULD move out of London for my 15 month old son and wanting to stay in London. I’d love to hear experiences of making the move, in either direction!

Here are my current main thoughts on London pros / cons.

Pros

• 30 minutes door to desk means I can pick DS up at 5pm so get 2 hours before bed with him, I work 5 days a week and start early so I can finish early
• So much to do - both for me and with DS. I love the parks, museums, restaurants, cafes
• Close to friends
• could move closer to my parents (but it would only shave a fraction of time off as they’re other end of country)

Cons

• We have a 4 bed terraced house with small paved garden, which is amazing, but rooms are small and would love a big grassy garden for DS (but we are 10 minute walk from massive amazing park with play area)
• School - terrible state schools so would have no choice to go private (but at least it’s cheaper than nursery!)
• Area starting to get run down and so much traffic - would be lovely to have a calmer environment that we walk around after nursery and at weekends if we stay local

Stay

Don't go rural unless you want to spend all your free time in 10 years or so driving your teenager everywhere.

Are the schools really that bad where you are? Worth really doing your research and checking catchment areas for schools slightly further away as that seems to be the only significant downside. Primary schools in London are generally pretty good.

(Edited to clarify - London primary schools are generally pretty good. And secondary is a long way off.)

Stay! Or move to the very outskirts of London, which is what we did. Your future teenagers will thank you. Mine absolutely love living in London and while you can argue the toss about what’s better for small children, there is zero doubt in my mind that being a teenager is better in a city, for both teens themselves and parents. (I grew up in a city too, albeit a much smaller one than London!)

Haha this is me too! Add in the drugs problem and the rural poverty and suddenly a countryside childhood sounds way less idyllic!

how about going a bit more suburban so you might get more space/different schools but still with super easy access to central London.

If we could afford London we would!
Schools around London are pretty good I think.

Wow thank you all. My commute is to Canary Wharf, so maybe looking at slightly less central options with a larger garden with good state primary school to save the fees is a good compromise.

I don't know your housing budget, but St Albans might suit if you wanted to move less central? Tonnes of good state schools, green space, it's great for young families. You'd get the train to farringdon and then the elizabeth line to canary wharf. Lots to do in the city itself or easy access to St Pancras (20 mins)

Your pros far outweigh your cons to me. Living near friends, work and amenities is so important.

I looked at there, but sadly property prices same as inner London now so doesn’t mean we can get a bigger place.

We are Honor Oak Park / East Dulwich / Peckham Rye area. Lots of parks and things to do. 4 bed mid terrace with decent garden for enjoying with large trampoline and swing set. All bedrooms are doubles and traffic is not too hectic. Good primary schools and every secondary parent I know is more or less happy with the schools. Plenty of choice. Easy cycle to CW but equally about 15/20 mins on public transport. We have a 13 year old and no regrets and as she has got older going to the West End / Westfield etc becoming more important - all 40 mins. Last minute decisions to do a show or an exhibition etc. If you move outside all of that is still available but takes a lot more planning and the costs of it with travel and accommodation are huge.

I should explore more of SE I think, you’re right, it’s got perhaps more charm than current area but still London.