19 years old daughter want to go abroad to girl she meet online

[Ann300]

Hi I am really struggling with my daughter and would like to know others parents opinion please .My 19 years old daughter want to go to see girl that she know from online for many years . (I spoke to her once .)I have many concerns and offered her trip at later time going together but my daughter got her mind set up on going now even by herself or taking option with her father that she don’t have best relations with .My concerns are that she is struggling mentally and she struggled to finish her A levels going to school and she is very fragile and exposed as had damaged childhood due to toxic environment at home gently speaking , and she already went behind my back went she was 16 with her father took her to see a boy on island all was planed behind my back .I am trying explain no need to rush there but she won’t have it.

Hi I am really struggling with my daughter and would like to know others parents opinion please .My 19 years old daughter want to go to see girl that she know from online for many years . (I spoke to her once .)I have many concerns and offered her trip at later time going together but my daughter got her mind set up on going now even by herself or taking option with her father that she don’t have best relations with .My concerns are that she is struggling mentally and she struggled to finish her A levels going to school and she is very fragile and exposed as had damaged childhood due to toxic environment at home gently speaking , and she already went behind my back went she was 16 with her father took her to see a boy on island all was planed behind my back .I am trying explain no need to rush there but she won’t have it.

She’s an adult - doesn’t mean you can’t be worried about her but not much you can do to stop her if she has her own funds.

You say she is fragile and struggling mentally - is this girl a good friend to her? Is it a romantic relationship? Where will your daughter stay, at a hotel or her friends house/parents house? Is it a large city, a small town etc.?

If she’s decided she’s going then all you can do is communicate with her and know as much as possible about the trip.

Gently, she’s an adult and you can’t stop her. I can understand why you’re concerned though. Can you ask her the following…

Can she fund the trip herself?
Where is she staying ?
Does the girl definitely exist? Could it be a scam?
Where is the girl?

What will your daughter do if it doesn’t work out?
How long is she going?
could she go with a friend?

As others have said your daughter is an adult so can go if she wants to. I can understand why you are worried though - and that's OK!

I would concentrate my efforts on finding out everything I could about the trip. Can your daughter afford it - will she stay in this girls home or stay in a hotel. How will she get spending money - flight details etc etc. Also ensure she has full travel insurance for the trip. Then at least you have all the information should anything go wrong. (and there's no reason it will go wrong)

Yes they talk all the time and she would stay in her parents house which is in in the middle on now where on Poland but she is exited and talking about trips etc
i know she is real as I spoke to her , my concerns are my daughter as she is very domestic doesn’t go anywhere by herself and don’t have any friends locally and I am just very concerned