6 month won’t eat finger food - wanted to do BLW?

[lostwithyou]

I started weaning my 6 month old 2 weeks ago. I did the 2 weeks of veg purées first and then wanted to start BLW until she was stable in the high chair as she still can’t sit up unaided. She is now more stable so decided to do some finger food for the past few days.
She just looks at it. Picks up something eventually, licks it and throws it on the floor. Doesn't bother trying anything else and wants out of the high chair.
She’s been like this for a couple of days now.
What do I do? I really didn’t want the faff of making purées and spoon feeding but is that the route I have to take?

If it’s like chicken curry, I’d break off a bit and wipe off the sauce with my fingers and give it to them. Wouldn’t add salt and would salt my own food when eating. They can have anything else. They can even have salt just not too much and processed food is loaded with it. With BLW they don’t actually eat that much for a month or two, then get the hang of it and are confident eating. They can have risotto and Thai chicken curry - at about 8 months their pincer control starts developing and they’ll pick up small bits. Before that they’ll grip it and squeeze it in their hands and eat from the sides of their fists. I really recommend that book it explains all their motor control abilities month by month.

Babies love strong flavours like onion and garlic. Mine loved saag and daal.

If the mess and waste stress you out then don’t do BLW. You can batch cook and freeze purées or mushed up food.

I hated BLW. Was far more relaxed spoon feeding.

I can’t hand my 6 month old baby who has never eaten food before some Thai chicken curry or bacon risotto (made with stock and cheese)
Sure you can. You can use reduced salt stock. You can add some yoghurt to a curry to cool the spice down if you think it's too much. They can pick up clumps of rice or chunks of chicken. Banana works to cool down spice levels too weirdly.

It's not as easy as just giving a baby a bit of whatever you're eating every meal and never having to think more about it but they are really versatile and open to more flavours early on than they are at 18 months.

That's what baby led weaning is. The baby leads..they will start to eat food when they are ready. Milk is their main source of food at 6 months.

I was waiting until just after 6 months to start as we were on holidays..my baby had other ideas and started grabbing food from our hands/plates and eating it.

Just do a bit of both. I really don't understand the need to be so rigid.

Totally fine. She doesn’t need to be eating 3 meals a day at 6 months. Short of exposure to common allergens, she doesn’t need to be eating at all. Just give her a bit of what you’re eating and let her mush it and chuck it on the floor. She won’t still be doing that at 8 or 10 months though. She will get the hang of it.

There's absolutely nothing wrong with spoon feeding and using purees. Some people get very self righteous and evangelical about BLW as if it's the only way to wean a child and using purees or spoon feeding is going to cause some sort of harm or make your child fussy. Practically everyone I know has done a combination of both and has done for many years.

My son didn't start eating finger food until about 7/8 months but was absolutely starving and he was spoon fed and hoovered up purees before moving to more chunky food. Contrary to popular belief, you can't force feed a child purees. At age 3, he's still a good eater, eats a wide variety of food and textures and no concerns around coordination or jaw development that people who do blw would have you think happens if you spoon feed. If you're child wants to be spoon fed I'd carry on doing that and you can introduce finger food further down the line.

The mess and waste is part of baby led weaning.

re spices don’t make it too hot but they can have seasoning, and a bit of heat. You can add more to yours when serving or section a portion out for them. It might make your food more bland for a while but the other option is to make them different food all the time.
you can also add yogurt to their portion to lower the spice levels.

at 6m though you can just mash up a bit of veg. They don’t need 3 full meals a day.

We did a mix and would prepare puree and whole food of the same food and then dip the whole food into the puree using it as an edible spoon.

We also did puree on strips of toast again as edible spoons. She was slow to wean and inconsistent whether she was likely to want puree or whole foods. She also had a lot of food allergies and this allowed us to test foods quite quickly as both scenarios were covered so it didn't matter if she was in a good or a puree mood.

Veg purees with whole version of the same food ( e,g peas in pea sauce) are still staples in our house aged 4 as pasta sauces can be tricky otherwise because of her limited diet.

It really doesn’t matter. You’ve literally just started. Spoon feed some things and give her a spoon she can bash about herself as well. Put out other food for her to explore too. You don’t have to make up purées. Just cook your normal meals and use a stick blender to blend some for her but also give her elements of the meal to explore. She’ll barely be eating any solids at the moment anyway.

People make such a big deal over this. Don’t over complicate it and don’t label it anything.

It takes aaages to get going! We bought a large oilcloth mat for under the high chair which we took everywhere and just kept that scrupulously clean so everything on the mat got handed back! Persevere it’s really worth it as so much easier than purées

Babies can have most seasoning apart from salt and it’s often possible to add the salt or some additional spice at the end after removing a portion for the baby. If having something like marinated chicken you can also leave a small portion without the marinade if too spicy and wrap it in foil separately while cooking (if baking or grilling). Likewise you can take a small piece of the veges that you have at hand and quickly steam it in the microwave. At least you are not buying separate ingredients to cook something for the baby that might just get ignored or thrown on the floor.

You also don’t have to give them a whole balanced meal at that stage, you can just pick out bits that are suitable.

Overall the aim of weaning is to get the baby on the same diet as the rest of the family (unless you fancy cooking separate meals for years) so if you cook with a lot of spices you want to be introducing those flavours early even if you have to tone it down a bit at first.

I would add that spoon feeding can be baby led too . You can load a spoon and let them bring it to their mouth. Someone I knew that strictly did BLW refused to use a spoon even for porridge or yoghurt which seems ridiculous.

It's hard work for the baby to eat food through finger foods initially and they have to learn how to manage it in their mouth and swallow. It's a process. Make up some simple pureed food with a bit of texture, you can freeze portions. Mix and match.

@Ketryne

There’s nothing wrong with seasoning or mild spices for babies.

I make the same curries for my child as I do for us and have done since he was a baby. I cook them in the slow cooker with everything but salt and chilli peppers. Then I take some out for him, and cook the rest for a further hour with chilli peppers in for us. Enough has been removed for my son that will do him for that night’s dinner and then I can freeze the rest. He eats it the same consistency as we do now, but as a baby I would blend with a stick blender and then later I would just cut the chicken up smaller for him.

You can serve a baby anything you’re eating as long as you leave out the salt (your dish can be salted at the table) or specific things like honey until a certain age. Some foods lend themselves to blending with a stick blender (curry, bolognese, chilli etc) and you can control how blended you want it to be. Other meals you just give them bits of what you’re having served in a way that avoids the risk of choking as best you can.

Of course babies can eat what you’re eating for dinner.

It's ok to give them food with spices in, just make them a bit milder for now.

Give finger foods alongside purees, as purees are the easiest most efficient way of introducing them to allergens. You don't really want to introduce allergens as finger foods when they're still in the stage of playing with food as then first exposure is through the skin which increases risks of allergies.

Re spices and flavours
My daughter is allergic to nightshades including chilli, as well as alliums such as onions and garlic and soya.
We cook onions and garlic separately and stir into our dishes at the end. We used chilli sauce and soya sauce at the table. Despite her allergies we eat curries frequently and they are a firm favourite. we make our own curry mixes without the things she can't have in and add the extras at the table. We used a lot of Indian chutneys and salsas to add a bit more flavour our ours whilst keeping hers safe.

You can absolutely give a baby a curry or a risotto. They can have bacon and cheese. I’d use mild spices, and a low salt stock (and add more salt to my portion) they can have a spoon they hold themselves, or just pick up risotto with their hands. With a curry I’d have made it mild and chunky and served to baby naan or roti instead of rice. I gave them things pasta bolognese just as it comes. Give them a bath after. Neither of mine ever had a puree. I think DSs first meal was toast and some broccoli on the side, day 2 he had a veggie puff pastry tart.
You think it’s being disingenuous but I think your idea of what a baby can and can’t have is the issue. Baby food and purées is a really recent idea, barely 100 years old. Do you think people around the world and across history have made special purées for babies? No they just gave them food.

As long as it’s not a really hot chilli there’s no reason a baby can’t have spices. In my experience babies like lots of flavour (and then become fussy toddlers for a while) I guarantee that south asian mums have just fed their babies what they’re making for the family for all of time.

I think my point has been misunderstood here, I know all these foods are suitable with moderations for a baby that is eating well. I did this with my first DC from 8 months ish.

But I’m not going to give a baby that’s still spitting out spinach puree and hasn’t ever had dairy or gluten or egg or fish etc. a portion of curry. Surely you still need to do the first couple of months of first tastes/purees/finger foods to work through the allergens and get them comfortable with the concept of eating. I’m literally 1 week in and roughly following the Charlotte Stirling Reed ‘how to wean’ book but moving through it faster on 2 meals a day. It’s a massive faff but I’m hopeful I’ll be at modified family meals (as everyone is suggesting here) within a couple of months.

I didn’t give it that much thought. We just ate what we wanted to eat without the salt and made baby’s portions milder if it was a spicy dish.

Why can’t a baby have what we’re having? If we were having a roast dinner then they’d get a hunk of chicken to gnaw on and steamed veg, skip the salty gravy. If we were having curry, they’d have curry just as they do now but more blended. They’d stick their hands in it and have a whale of a time. Same with breakfast they’d have toast and egg, just in the early days we opted for crustier bread so that they could have a good gnaw on it without it gumming up in their mouth. Nice bit of crusty bread toasted and dipped in egg yolk with avocado on the side. m

I didn’t read any books and I don’t know what you mean by first tastes. I remember giving my baby peanut butter on toast early on and keeping an eye on them. The toast was crusty bread and the peanut butter was watered down with a tiny bit of milk. Other than that, baby was reaching out to grab food all the time so we let them eat whatever. Tbh if someone gave me a spoonful of pureed spinach I’d bloody well spit it out too.

Same really. I didn't bother systematically working through allergens or any purees.

I wasn't any kind of purist, we did plenty of pouches too because sometimes it was just more convenient. But I never followed any weekly program

Yes, I’ve never heard of a weekly programme. I really couldn’t be arsed with anything like that. It sounds like turning something pleasant into a total chore. We also always had a few Ella’s pouches always in the cupboard for emergencies or days when meals just didn’t line up the way we wanted and it was convenient. He’d usually have a pouch and then a Greek yogurt and fruit or something like that. Really couldn’t be arsed to give it any more thought. Babies are hard work as it is without adding in an unnecessary weaning schedule.

Babies are hard work as it is without adding in an unnecessary weaning schedule.
Absolutely!

We did ‘veg led’ as in introducing the more bitter veg for the first few weeks before all the sweet stuff. I would offer it as finger food and a purée version but think I only did that for about 4 days before I couldn’t be bothered with purée anymore - would just mash if things needed it after that.

Worked great at the time DD took to it all really well and she’s still a pretty good eater as 4 year olds go, but still had her fussy phases and still has a very sweet tooth so not sure how much difference it made overall!

Aside from those first couple of weeks we mostly did just do what we were eating - including curry etc. Salt at the end.

As for finger food - we always offered it but if it was something that made sense to use a spoon I’d use spoons - give the child some pre loaded spoons to have a go themselves and occasionally spoon a bit in for them, but also just let them have at it with their firsts too.

Bibado bib, or just strip off to eat, old shower curtain under the high chair to catch bits. Mess wasn’t my favourite but actually quite manageable.

I always sat and ate with her, to model it and made lots of ‘mmm this is yummy’ type noises. A tip I read (I think it was on Solid Starts) if they’re really not interested is put a he food in your mouth (talking like a long carrot stick etc not a mouthful of yogurt obviously) and offer it them that way - they’re more likely to accept apparently. Bit gross but worth a try?

Also at 6 months youre not necessarily doing 3 meals a day, so the ‘eat what you eat’ doesn’t have to be dinner. I think we started with lunches as I was still on mat leave and had more time then. Then added in breakfast before we started with dinners. Plenty of things youre eating at those times would be fine for babies even if you’re thinking your dinners wouldn’t be - scrambled egg, toast with cream cheese or nut butter, yogurt, bit of hummus and pita, omelette fingers, veggie sticks (cucumber or steam some carrots), porridge, weetabix etc, make a really thick soup and stir in some couscous whilst it’s cooling to make it extra thick for them to have a go at scooping (once a bit more able) or dipping bread in.

Really recommend Charlotte Sterling Reed - on instagram and she has some good books and also a blog with lots of free info, look up SR Nutrition.