Pumping and breastfeeding

[Pessimist]

Another naïve question from me as a 35-week pregnant ftm!

Looking to help my DH feed baby but I intend to exclusively breastfeed. He works funny hours so want to get as good a routine as possible which won't screw up my supply.

I'm thinking of using an electric pump, so would a plan like this work? (Obviously baby dependent etc - I know babies don't have watches and may not like a bottle! 😂).

06:00 - 10:00: just breastfeed (no pump)
12:00 - 16:00: BF + pump at same time
16:00 - 22:00: DH uses bottled breastmilk (pump if I'm engorged, but otherwise - freedom!)
22:00 - 06:00: just breastfeed (no pump)

(Also - in your experience, is this something I could try for first time after two weeks or would I have to do this ASAP?)

Wait for longer. 6-8 weeks so you can establish Breastfeeding. For several months you will need to pump when baby has a bottle to maintain your supply but also for your comfort as your breast continue to make milk and you may get uncomfortable.
Will you husband be responsible for the cleaning etc if pump parts and bottles? Making sure you don't have to do more jobs.

If you are at home baby may not want the bottle and only want you. That early evening time is often called the witching hour as baby is very fussy, many mums find they get let downs when the baby cries.

I am a qualified breastfeeding beer supporter. Realistically for the first 6-8 weeks you breastfeed on demand which is every 45mins-2 hours. You shouldn’t go more than 2 hours during the day without breastfeeding as it’s not good for baby or you, and they WILL make up for it at night by feeding more. At night, despite current advice, I didn’t wake my baby to breastfeed. I let her dictate her night feeds. In the first 4 weeks the longest she slept without a feed at night was 6 hours (bliss!). After 6 weeks your supply has “evened out” so your body produces the correct amount of milk for baby (it’s a feedback loop, more baby drinks =more milk. Less baby drinks =less milk. When breasts are engorged, then your boobs tell you brain to stop making milk as this stuff is not being used.) if you pump as well you will get an “over-supply” which causes a fast flow difficult for babies to swallow at first and more risk of blocked ducts. When you do pump, only do it once a day if you have to, ideally in the morning as that’s when you make more milk. You can use “milk catchers” in the first few weeks if you like, as your boobs are often leaky at first.

If you pump too early you can get oversupply, which is best avoided, so I agree with the 6-8 weeks advice.

Pumping seems to be really individual - it works well for some and not for others. I had a friend that used a Hakka and got lots of milk that way while it didn't work for me, l while I pumped on NICU so had the hospital grade pump and got lots (hence why I know about over supply!) while other women didn't. You can rent the hospital grade pumps if it turns out the more readily available ones aren't working.

I think your expectations of freedom are a bit high. I've never known a breastfed baby to take a bottle when the person who is breastfeeding is there (even if they do at other times), and I expect you will be engorged and need to pump in a 6 hour period - I could usually get to 4 hrs comfortably but not longer. Although all babies (and women) are different!

If you want DH to help there’ll be enough to do with nappies, looking after youand housework. The postpartum period is the 4th trimester, whilst it’s important dads bond it’s more important that mum is looked after so she can bond with baby. Ideally, have the first week just relaxing at home or in bed with baby, doing skin to skin and establishing feeding. That’s the most important thing as it’s when you’re mental health is most vulnerable and baby needs you the most at this time as they already know your smell, voice and heartbeat. don’t let others options change the fact that 4th trimester is real.

You can’t really plan it this far in advance. I’d intended to EBF and do some pumping so DH could share feeds. No one warned me that not everyone can produce a full milk supply and not everyone gets much out when pumping!
It is very much go with the flow.

[I ended up combi-feeding as my milk was delayed coming in and we eventually settled at 50/50 BF/FF so did share the feeds, just not in the way I’d envisaged!]

I had a friend who preferred pumping to BF direct and easily pumped a litre of milk a day. Meanwhile I struggled to get more than about 50ml in total per day…

Thanks. I do know this may not work out - I just want a bit of guidance and something I can visualise. We could end up not bf'ing at all if boobs/baby won't play ball. While I know DH will have a lot to do, he really wants to feed baby and we don't want to use formula unless we absolutely have to. I would also probably like time off from being a human cow.

So, based on responses I:

• shouldn't pump before 6 weeks
• should only pump once a day.

(Would baby even bother after 6 weeks? Wouldn't it make sense to start this sooner so it's more normal?)

Could this look like this?

06:00 - 18:00: breastfeed (pump at the same time for one of the sessions)
18:00 - 22:00: DH uses bottled breastmilk if there's enough from single pump in the morning (I know this is a long time not to BF so expect I will need to express, but maybe I can work up to this?)
22:00 - 06:00: just breastfeed (no pump)

You want to introduce the bottle asap and definitely not as late as six weeks. You’re more likely to end up with a bottle refuser if you delay it. There’s a myth about nipple confusion which isn’t true!

Honestly, it really depends what happens during and after the birth and how the first few days go. I was told all this stuff about no bottle before six weeks, definitely don’t pump before then either, just BF as much as possible. And ended up with a five day old readmitted dangerously ill as my milk hadn’t come in, having to pump 8x per day as well as BF 8x per day so using a bottle 8x per day as well in an attempt to force the milk to come in!

In my experience 6pm - 11pm was peak cluster feeding time. You might find it easier to get DH to do a morning or afternoon bottle. Also one of your reasons is to not be a human cow but pumping doesn't take that away! if you're not breastfeeding you're pumping. Also echo PP in that pumping isnt a magic solution, I had no issues with breastfeeding but couldn't get more than a few drops from a pump. I would recommend a Hakka pump, you can start using it straight away to build up a stash in the freezer, it doesnt mess with supply because it catch natural let down from the other side while you're feeding on the other side. I could get 30-60 ml each feed using the hakka, vs nothing with a pump! also its cheaper :)

Although I agree with PP there are hundreds of ways he can help and feeding isn't the only way dads can bond with a baby. And also that there really is no point in making a 'plan' you need to figure it out when baby comes...sorry!

One of the loveliest bits of Breastfeeding was sitting on the couch post dinner. Feeding baby and having OH being me cups of tea. Babies content as I swaps sides when every they started to stir. Oh and I watched tv and chatted. Then when we were tired we would all go to bed.

For what it's worth, the people I know where the dad gave a bottle focused on their sleep needs. So usually it was: breastfeed the baby then immediately go to bed, dad gives the next feed to the baby so that the mum can sleep on, next time the baby wakes and needs a feed it's back to breastfeeding.

It doesn’t work like this with a newborn OP.
One problem with imagining that you can have break and your husband can take over with a bottle of expressed milk is that you will hear the baby cry and you boobs will go rock hard and start leaking milk. Especially if it’s been a few hours. When that happens you will want to breastfeed your baby immediately or pump if you can’t.
This reflex is called ´let down’ and it does calm down after a few weeks or months.
Unless you need to go back to work super early, I’d ignore pumping altogether for 6-8 weeks, then pump once a day in the morning after the baby has fed, and let your husband give whatever milk you got to the baby at a time that suits you. You will probably find you get far more milk when you’re replacing a feed with a pumping session rather than adding an extra pumping session when the baby is not actually hungry, but that’s fine when the point is mostly to get your baby used to a bottle and let your husband have a little go feeding your baby. It’s then useful that they will take a bottle when you do want to go out longer and leave the baby for longer periods of time.
You get more and more flexibility with feeding as time goes on.

Mine wouldn't take bottles (we tried very hard with the first baby) and I couldn't pump much despite having a very good double pump. Also it is much nicer breastfeeding them sitting with two pumps attached in a special bra or the balance of baby on one side and pump on the other. Plus washing and sterilising the pump and bottles was such a pain. The the baby wouldn't take the pumped milk anyway! I only pumped once with my second.

Also it might not be the cute, happy, contented feed your husband is imagining. Your baby will quite likely kick off because they’d rather have you and not dad with a bottle. Doesn’t mean it’s not worth preserving with it - it can be really convenient to have a bf baby who will accept a bottle. But it might not start out as this wonderful bonding experience for your husband.

Thanks all. I'm going to turn off notifications for this post and speak to my local breastfeeding support service closer to the time.