To give dummy or not

[Whatev3r]

So I gave a dummy to my first when I started her on formula, was pretty easy as she was bottle fed and the dummy worked wonderfully.
However for my second she's EBF (9 weeks old). I'm debating whether to offer her a dummy because firstly I'm scared I will miss her breastfeeding hunger cues, and now I also have a toddler to look after so it's not practical to sit and nurse her every time to get her to sleep (especially as it takes so long too), I really feel it's unfair for my toddler.
I've also seen from my first how difficult it is to stop the dummy, even though she was only given it for nap and sleep times.

However as I said I'm debating it because even when she nurses to sleep she wakes up so easily when put down, and in between feeds does cry a lot so it's difficult to get things done.

Any advice from mothers who have experience of this stuff with 2 or more children would be great!

Don’t nurse to sleep for one thing.
I personally hate dummies. I never gave it to mine. I had a routine from day one and it took a while but they got it and I always put them down when awake. I never let them cry more than a couple minutes but didn’t pick them up, I would try to soothe them back to sleep. My DD did suck her thumb for a while but stopped quickly.

I was told not to use a dummy so we didn't, we now regret this as we have a 12 year old who is struggling to stop thumb sucking and will have to have a brace due to over bite caused by this. But I appreciate I'm probably the extreme

I gave mine a dummy at 2 weeks old and EBF, in fact still is at 18 months as still breastfeeding.

From day 1 no confusion. If wanted milk he spat that dummy right out and made sure I was aware that was not what he wanted 🤣. Baby still didn't like being put down even with dummy so sling was a godsend to get stuff done.

I had a dummy as a baby no problems, got the fear put into them when sibling came along, who then sucked thumb and still was at 14 and needed extensive work done to jaw and teeth alignment as a result. Third sibling (after long long age gap) got a dummy! You can take a dummy away but not a thumb.

This is us too. My first had a dummy which we took away as he got older without issues. Second didn’t seem to need the dummy (just a more relaxed baby) but now have a 7 year old who sucks her thumb when sleeping and it’s really hard to do anything about that.

We've tried everything over the years including hypnotherapy and nothing has worked. He's hoping when he gets his brace it will help him stop

My daughter didn't give her little one a dummy and she sucks her fingers. She's a self soother and it seems to work for them.