Social services advice please

[Lulu3108]

Hi,
I would like any advice please.
I am involved with social services because of contacting the police on the children’s dad. He has substance misuse issues and his behaviour under the influence he becomes abusive.

had previous involvement for the same reason he had turned up at the school. Had assessments done usually quite positive but the area I lived in was quite deprived. May explain why they didn’t really get involved that much.
They just said supervise contact. Not to see the children in intoxicated.

It has gotten worse where it was affecting my neighbours. He was turning up at all hours and being abusive a noisy. I had enough. I ended up going to the police station and kicking off had a safeguarding unit which had really helped. The officer advised me to get a normal molestation, which is what I applied for off my own back.

The social services in my new area stated no contact however a IDVA suggested that my son could get a taxi to school as he was going to school in our old area sometimes we would see their dad intoxicated around the vicinity of the school

I had a visit from the social worker. She explained that she would not be primarily dealing with Me and it would be a family support worker carrying out the assessment on Me

She had not met all my children, only my baby and came to my house

After a few weeks I emailed her because I was asking her for the taxi service for my son she said it wasn’t possible in which I emailed back and said could something be done about his new school place or what is the progress of this as discussed from the meeting, there was no progress she ended up not replying but her manager called me who insisted that they cannot provide a taxi service

I then went to the doctors for an appointment for myself. The doctor mentioned to me as they know me quite well. I have been a few few years that social services have contacted them for myself wanting to know if there was any information about me that they needed to know the doctors said they had replied with a Primary Care summary.

I had not consented to my medical files being looked up. I would’ve been fine with them seeing my medical files. It’s not an issue but it’s a fact for me that the social worker hasn’t even met my children or ask them if they are okay in the situation they are in yet she has gone and contacted my GP. I thought they were not allowed to do this as when had done previous assessments before because of their father once I had to sign over consent for my medical files to be accessed this was done without any knowledge to me.

I took my younger children for vaccinations. I was 10 minutes late because the Health Visitor insisted on coming to my house. She arrived half an hour late despite telling her I had an appointment. I was 10 minutes late for the appointment for their jabs after she had left my house. I told the receptionist this she said it’s fine. Come back later on they will do it when I went back to get my children’s vaccinations I noticed on the computer screen that the doctor surgery this is another doctors to mine Had stated concerns that I had DNA the appointment not acknowledging the reasons why that I had rebooked later on the afternoon and that they were going to contact the social services to tell them of this .

The Health is always a nice woman, but never in all my time of having a health is Office visiting. Have they asked to look through every single room of my house which I allow her to do so every time I see one of the professionals whether it be a Health is are or a family Support they keep asking me if I need beds or cots for my children which I don’t I understand some people may need this help but I find it very patronising because it is asked several times to me. I would starve before having my children any unsuitable Bed . Again, I don’t mean to sound like that, but it’s just the way it has been said to me. I am only involved with these people because of what their father has done with his substance misuse and yet they haven’t contacted their father at all. When he had tried to contact them, they said he has to go to the family court.

They want to do a TaF meeting but both schools are unavailable however they are resuming the Task meeting without both schools only Health Visitor Social Worker and family when I have googled this I am kind of struggling to grasp what I need to do in this meeting. I’m sorry to sound like this but I am really involved with social services because of the whole protocol following calling the police on my ex partner

I have made a statement during this time period of being involved with social services for coercive control. He is on bail and cannot come near the school that my son is in or in the borough I live in.

I will be doing a saw on my social care files but when I mention this to the family support worker she seem very like no we didn’t ask for their medical files. We just informed them that we were involved however she did not do this personally it was the Social Worker who had done it, not her.

So my questions are that were social services right? Or what reasons would they have done to have contacted my GP? Regarding myself without my consent or permission.

If anybody knows what is likely to be discussed at the Task meeting on what would be the purpose of one read from Google that is to provide support but I’m sorry to sound like this. I’m not really sure what Support could be offered because I have pretty much taking my own steps with this before them contacting me.

I have this feeling that I have got off the wrong foot with the Social Worker over the misunderstanding with the taxi service. I’m sorry to sound like this. I know there is a lot of negativity with social workers when I was under my old council I had dealt with social workers and I have read the assessments they have done on me and I have never had a bad or a negative experience with social service services but I can honestly say I feel like I’m not really gaining anything here surrounding my situation now more than anything it’s irritating me if I am honest

Thank you

So far I haven’t received anything.
thanks for this.
what am I expecting in terms of support And what should I ask for.
ive been proactive myself in terms of a non mol, they’ve said dad needs to go through family courts, I’ve done a statement. It’s kind of off my own back I’ve done this because I was fed up.
housing will be applying in other areas for a fresh start further away.
ive referred myself to CBT for myself, and have asked the schools if they have a councillor.
other than that I don’t know. My toddler now goes nursery.

bearing in mind after I moved I emailed both LA ss and had emailed, because I felt like the previous LA passed the buck on the new one and wouldn’t really help me. I asked for a full blown assessment a few months ago.

there is too much crosswires with a SS and a family support, as in they repeat what eachother say or unsure or even professionals the schools can get confused.

family support woman is nice. But she just offers me nursery for my baby really and if I want grants.

im happy to be under social services in terms of that is a protocol that has be to be followed after contacting the police. I dont like the patronising tones sometimes and the communication. I’ve always had a positive experience with social workers and I don’t know now with this one I think I rattled her over the emails and her manager had to phone me.

You know you can decline a CiN plan if you don't find it helpful?

So, your social worker is part of the Child In Need team? A child in need plan is voluntary and one 'step up' from early help. It's not section 47, child protection etc. It's been transferred from your previous council to the current one. The information sharing consent seems to have been carried over (which it shouldn't have been) Your case is being worked by a family support worker, this is normally a 'targetted' piece of work over a number of weeks normally around things like healthy relationships and to help your children process the trauma around dv. It's supervised by a social worker as family support workers aren't qualified (bit like teachers and teaching assistants)
Ask to speak to the supervising social worker as to what their plans are.
The TAF can go ahead without the schools present, they would provide a brief report on attendance and how the children are at school.
Can you move schools, complete an in year admission application and get the ball rolling

Yes. I feel intimidated now after the whole doctors with the jabs and my doctors (different practice) and I don’t want to p them off anymore. Some of my children are in a new school and I don’t know them well.

Their dad is on a number of bails for drunk and disorderly type offenses and behaviour (London) it’s very likely with the dv on top he will inevitably be locked up at some point.

this had been a recent thing the substance misuse drugs and alcohol. He had started getting arrested since September for his behaviour intoxicated.

I had emailed ss and asked for assessments to help the whole family. However this isn’t now the case. In terms of my expectations.

i had enough of living like that and dealing with someone who had substance misuse. I realised I couldn’t help him he had to help himself. It was affecting my MH and I had to take care of the kids. This is why I went to the police station… and made the steps I’d taken.

No. The LA wouldn’t open an assessment. This was December.
there had been 4 referrals made in 3 months. 2 in one week by my sons school. He had turned up the school intoxicated and a neighbour of his address had made a disclosure in the school about him and his family.

i then emailed both LAs in January.
as I was not happy nothing was done.
the same screening sw would not open an assessment. 4 times.

family support got involved in February because I rang 999.
it went to a supervising sw in march.
its now mid May.
they have only met me once.
no contact with my children.
Doctors contacted and schools.
only a taf meeting scheduled.

yes on waiting lists no spaces.

as my expectations were ss we’re going to do a section 47. And involve the father. With his substance misuse etc. help with contact centre.
thags what my expectations were.
however this is not the case.

nothing about my children’s emotional state. They are upset that they cannot see their dad
i have enquired about therapy for them. Asides from substance misuse etc and behaviour they miss him.

when I had asked she had said she would give me some paperwork or attachments on their behaviour surrounding not seeing their dad/substance misuse/dv. But I’d asked they didn’t say anything.
ifs a bit odd
i understand with social care I’d worked in it years ago there’s a lack of money. I get that and they can’t manage my expectations it’s fine. But what I’m finding odd is how they’ve done the assessment.
famiky support can’t access ss system or resources, nor contact professionals unless she has my consent
honestly think I’ve annoyed the ss over the taxi emails. So she’s gone on my gp to see what there is on me.
but I’m clean.
sorry that’s my opinion.
as ive done nothing wrong, no consent, no permission or inform. There’s been no progress with this for months until I emailed.

Another thing I found weird was, when I met her.
i was holding my baby. She said put the baby down and let them play.
i have 4 kids I live by routine.
we had been up since 6. Done 2 school runs. My daughter was tired. I didn’t want to come accords as resistant or difficult so I put her in her play thing.
she started crying. I knew this because she was tired.
I picked her up she fell asleep.
as I’ve said I’ve done assessments, I’ve got a sen child with adhd. I’ve never been instructed or told what to do with my children. Neither have they written anything bad about how we are together.
i just found that a bit odd.

I haven’t worked in social care for a long while. Is this usual process. Or am I thinking something else. Regarding the doctors. On a CIN supervised by a SW with a family support to do that. If they suspected harm to go without my consent or permission.. surely it would be a sec 47.
my friend said ask to change sw but I don’t want to make matters worse. I feel cornered now.
I had enough of him. I went to the police etc. and this is just stress.

You wouldn't meet threshold for a Section 47 as you have been the protective factor for your children (,you're not seeking to continue the relationship etc) Checking with your gp is literally to keep records up to date. Its usual process for a CIN plan, unfortunately due to work load these plans can 'drift'
Contact the family support worker and ask them what they are doing now and next. If nothing, ask them to close the CIN plan, it's voluntary and they're not assisting you so tell them to close it.

I think you are concentrating too much on why your medical records were disclosed. Move past this and try give your children the best life you can. Lots of struggling families do need help with beds, cookers etc so this is why there are offering help. It’s a traumatic time for the children. Try put all this worry about who has said what and concentrate on making the children happy. They probably miss their dad and just need the stability of a happy home without mum worrying about who has said what to who. Social services are looking out for you and your children. Health visitor has a duty of care to check everything is ok at home

Well done @Lulu3108for making a statement to the Police and getting a Non-Molestation order in place.

Have you managed to get the baby vaccinated yet?