4yo asking to go to childcare more… bored of time with 1yo sibling?

[Penguinpenguin29]

My eldest has asked to go to childcare for four days (currently does 3). A couple of her friends at her preschool do this, some even do five but usually it’s because the family can’t do anything else rather than choice. This is a 0800-1800 setting.

For the two days my eldest isn’t in childcare, she’s with a parent and a 1yo sibling. I’m wondering if she’s finding time with her sibling boring? We do always do something, whether that be go to the park, town, local city farm, playgroup, a playdate etc… but am I limiting my 4yo by not having them in childcare more?

I’ve always thought they got the socialisation and stretch they needed within the three days, and by day three they are exhausted usually. Perhaps it’s just boredom having to do activities that also can work for a 1yo. Or an attention thing now the 1yo can walk?

Has anyone ever encountered this? Any advice? At the moment I’m selling them the wonders of school in September when they’ll get a whole five days!!!!

Feeling guilty and wondering how to make life more entertaining for my 4yo!!

If you can afford to send her 4 days then why not

Does she play with toys at home? Or paint or craft stuff or jigsaws?

We could probably just about manage it but selfishly I suppose I’d like to spend time with her and her sibling together before she starts school. And a parent is off anyway the two days she’s not in childcare due to compressed hours so it doesn’t make financial sense.

Yes we do loads of crafting, we also do lots of reading, scooting, bike rides. Jigsaws seem not to be their thing at the moment. They are very into role play so we do a fair bit of that too.

Might be worth finding out if there is something specific they do on the 4th day that she feels she is missing out on perhaps?

Must be so reassuring for you though that she loves being there so much.

Being 'bored' at home with parent and younger sibling is also important for development as well though. We don't do children any favours by entertaining them constantly - having free unscheduled time with some expectation they will entertain themselves or play with siblings is great for developing independent skills and resilience.

I don't think you're limiting her and you're right, financially it just doesn't make sense if there's a parent at home anyway. It sounds like you do lovely things on her days with you and it's literally only 4 months until she goes to school. Is there the option for half days as a compromise? Have you asked her why she wants to do an extra day? Is it just because her friends do it? Unfortunately at some point they need to learn that they can't always do what their friends do if it doesn't work for your family!

It might just be FOMO. I wouldn't change anything. I would enjoy this summer with both DC. It's good for them to have some quieter time at home and well as days out. Hopefully we will get some decent weather and they can have time exploring outdoors.

I would be careful not to think too deeply from an adult point of view. They may just think 'Sally said she goes to nursery on Fridays. If I go to, I can carry on playing chase with Sally' rather than thinking 'going to the park with mummy and baby is boring, I wish I could go to nursery more'.

I agree with this. When my DC are 'bored' they often end up doing the most imaginative play. You sound like you are doing a great job of outings and things to play with at home.

My DD went to nursery part time 5 days a week. Is this possible? I agree with the poster about learning to fill their own time and not be entertained every minute of the day. Do what you can afford but school will be a shorter day!

Thank you, you are right it is reassuring! I think as others have said there probably is a fear of missing out going on. Her closest pals do seem to do four or five days.

Sadly not from a work perspective and it’s already going to be a juggle in September!