Oh my goodness, how do I get through this stage!!

[anonny55]

Baby’s 8 weeks today.. for the past few days he’s been so fussy and screams and screams for hours. I feel like I try everything and I just can’t make it stop.

im failing , miserably. Sisters came over for an hour so I can have a breather but I can still hear him from the other room🫤 I’m so overstimulated and finding it so hard. Please tell me it gets better😟

please no DH comments about help etc. he has to work away for weeks at a time so is obviously no help at this moment in time. Struggling . A lot!

It gets better OP, I promise. You are in the trenches and you aren’t failing! Can you go out for an hour while your sisters are there?

It absolutely gets better!
Sorry I have little advice, just a virtual hug.

It gets better.
A sling was my savior with DS1. Worth a go - especially if you know someone you could borrow one off initially to try it out. DS liked a stretchy wrap.

It gets better.

This sounds like a refluxy baby to me. Have you considered going dairy free if you are exclusively breastfeeding? Formulae’s need to be prescribed by a GP unfortunately. Cows milk protein allergy is extremely common in young children and under estimated as it is mostly self diagnosed.
please consider allergies if your baby has an upset tummy. Advice from a dietitian and mum myself.
You are doing well, motherhood is hard.

If you don't have other kids who need to be in bed, I'd get a comfy sling (ergobaby embrace is brilliant for needy newborns) and go for an evening walk when they start kicking off. Twenty mins at a fast pace will usually get them to sleep, and then you can drift along and gather your thoughts. It does get easier.

Besides saying "it gets better", are you breast or bottle feeding? Are you eating dairy if breast feeding? If bottle feeding have you switched up formulas?

I was underfeeding my newborn (not significantly) but once I upped the feeds he was a much happier boy (never really unhappy).

Get RID of dairy and see what happens.

Is he getting enough day time naps? He could be overtired.

I second the early evening walks..about 5pm. Bed at 7.

Has he been screaming all day every day? Since when? Out of the blue or has he always been fussy?

You don't need a GP to go out and buy lactose free formula.

Lactose free formula is not cow milk protein free. Lactose is different to cows milk protein. Most babies need the protein removed, hence why I suggested this.

I'm sure 7/8 weeks is meant to be the peak of crying. So it will gradually reduce from now on. If that's any help??
You are doing a wonderful job though

Thanks all for the advice:). He’s not always been like this, around 3 weeks he was as he was struggling with constipation. He was prescribed laxatives and gp told me to try him on comfort for constipation formula which has resolved everything and he’s happy on it. He’s definitely not underfed, he’s 15lb4 and has 5oz every 3hrs (even still through the night every 3hrs like clockwork) he’s a big boy and gaining weight perfectly:)

doesnt show any signs of tummy problems from what symptoms I’ve looked at on google..

i have a sling that I have him in constantly but after my c section I’ve been struggling with back pain so I can’t wear him for as long as I wish. I usually wear him so I can wash bottles, make some food etc. maybe I should save the wearing time for the evening and get some fresh air. He’s really happy when in the car so I do make a habit of getting out in the car and driving to places I can push him around which helps. He’s my first dc and I think I’m just really overwhelmed thinking is this my reality now, an overstimulated, over tired mother with not 2 minutes to breath. I know it will get better and I love him so much id do anything for him but wow motherhood is bloody difficult!

he had his jabs 3 days ago, was sleepy the day of and just been whingey since. Maybe it’s that. He hasn’t got a temperature and I gave him a few doses of calpol after but who knows maybe it’s not that!

anyway my sister has offered to sleep over and get up through the night with him. I feel so guilty but she can see I’m struggling and doesn’t mind to help so I shall take it with my arms (and legs!)

thank you all again☺️

I think the worse part is he’ll just scream for 10 minutes straight, so bad that he’s bright red in the face and coughing/choking because he’s so dramatically screaming and nothing will make it stop. Then he’ll fall asleep. Then repeat the next hour. If this is the peak and it won’t get worse I may survive!🤣

Definitely take the help! There's not much people can actually do that's helpful so she'll be delighted that she can be of actual use. Yeah try a car ride or you could also try getting in the bath with him - that way you can have it deeper so that he's definitely not cold and water often works wonders (at least temporarily!). This isn't your new norm - it's just how it is for now. But it won't last long. You'll start to have nights where he only briefly cries, and then you'll realise you've had an evening which has been uneventful. He's probably still feeling a bit crap from the vaccines so I'd definitely Calpol him again if you can get it into him.

Ahh OP I feel for you, I still remember the screaming phase now 6 years on, but I promise it’s a phase that doesn’t last forever! Do you have a big bouncy ball from pregnancy? Sitting and bouncing on that helped settle ours, along with evening walks. A friend swore by taking her baby to the local swimming pool every evening for a while!

Sorry if this sounds obvious, but have you tried putting ear plugs/head phones in? I didn’t think to do that when I was in the thick of the newborn phase, but I saw this suggested online recently - blasting out a favourite song and bouncing baby gently around to the beat will be far more pleasant than listening to the screaming. Your sister is amazing for offering to help - definitely take it.

Hang on in there, it does get better!

Oh bless you. Screaming for hours sounds so tough.

To rule it out, any symptoms of allergies/CMPA or reflux?

will baby be soothed by feeding at all during these times?

Also, could he be hungry? Every 3 hours may not be enough for him? Are you not feeding on demand?

Definitely could be jabs too

But yeah it doesn’t really matter if he’s a big boy and gaining weight etc, I’m presuming at that age if he cries you offer a bottle first of all, they can have growth spurts and want to eat and drink more often. I don’t go 3 hours without a drink myself! So do check you’re not trying to stick too rigidly to a schedule…

Usually it does mean something is wrong when they scream like that, whether discomfort, pain, wanting to eat more little and often, wind (assuming you do paced bottle feeding), jabs reaction. It’s just so tough figuring out what it is.

@Springadorable I will try and give him more calpol , was worried I was giving to much as dr said just for next 24hrs and it’s been 3 days🫤

@Gemstar3im actually taking him swimming for the first time on Monday, I may implement that more often if he enjoys it, also digged my old beats out and there charging - good idea!😆

@LuluDelulu he has no symptoms of those from what I’ve read on google, bottle doesn’t soothe him at these times. I feed on demand which is roughly every 3hrs sometimes more sometimes less but typically 3. I have tried to offer bottle while he’s screaming incase it’s that but he spits it out..I’m thinking maybe the jabs. We do paced bottle feeding yes :)

You’re definitely not failing. We all feel like this at various bits on the way…being a mum is fucking hard and you’re doing your best and finding your way. Don’t add beating yourself up into the mix, it’s hard enough without that, you’re doing great, it’s not your fault it’s hard