How to get baby into the next to me/stop bed sharing

[anonny55]

He’s 8 weeks. Would never settle or sleep in his next to me to the point it was just getting dangerous with the lack of sleep/falling asleep with him in arms etc. I started bed sharing and he sleeps for 3-4hr burst if he’s in my bed so happy days. I never wanted to bed share as I’m so scared of Sids. Once again just seem a post online about a woman’s baby who died at 5 months whilst bed sharing.

im so scared of it happening to me that I really don’t want him in my bed with me but I also can’t live with hallucinating from lack of sleep. HOW do I do this!

I could never get my kid to sleep in the Next to Me. Ended up putting the cot next to the bed with the side off and putting baby in there once deeply asleep. It took a while but got there in the end. They just want to be near you!

No advice but following as my son NEVER slept in his next to me crib - out of desperation we co slept and followed the ‘safer sleep’ rules. Having another baby and I imagine it will be the same with this one!!

We followed the safer sleep rules - ours would never sleep away from us.

Same here. I Just wait until he’s deeply asleep and put him in the little bassinet (?) next to me. Will start now for day naps too and then try „drowsy but awake“ from week 12 on.

using a baby bay, so bed is directly next to mine without anything in between.

Bit out there but we used a hammock for babies two and three next to the bed after baby one hated the cot and still wasn’t sleeping well when I was pregnant with the next one. I couldn’t face another round of cot-hating and so looked for an alternative. The hammock was called Natures Sway and both babies slept in it SO much better than my son (or they) ever did in a cot. It rocks, bounces, sways a little which lulls them to sleep, and cocoons them more than a cot. They can’t roll over in it.

You can either hang from a hook in a joist, hang on a freestanding frame, or hang from a doorway. It was easy to take on trips away from home by using the doorway hanger.

I looked into the SIDS risk from it. At the time I was happy it was safe. I read the safety records for hammock companies generally and couldn’t find a report on a SIDS case from any of them. Then found out how many units they had sold to see over what number of babies that was. My conclusion was it was much lower per 1000 babies than the national average of SIDS cases. But this was 8 years ago and I can’t remember the details. Also things may have changed and there may be more info out there now.

Bed sharing is protective from sids as long as you are following the safe sleep seven.

It's obviously completely unnatural for a baby to sleep in a cot alone - of course many of us do it to meet the demands of modern life!

You could also try a side car type set up so you can just scoot the baby over when they're fully asleep.

Same as other posters, baby would never sleep in cot alone until at least 6 months old (and even then ended up in bed after the first long stretch) until gradually getting to full nights sleep by 10ish months old every now and then and finally sleeping through reliably by about 16months old.

I wish I had just started out bed sharing instead of stressing those first weeks about getting baby to sleep so I could sleep. As soon as we did co sleep i got so much more rest and baby slept more too.

Did you ever worry about sids with co sleeping? I keep thinking the worse as I see so much bad things online and how the next to me is the safest option. I follow safe sleep 7 but worried if I pull my blanket over him while I’m asleep or roll onto him etc.

I know you were responding to a different poster but just wanted to jump in - I was worried about SIDS and co sleeping, absolutely wasn’t my Plan A ! But in truth I was accidentally falling asleep with my baby on my chest , it happened a good few times and I’d wake up maybe 30-45 min later … that was really scary but my brain and body were broken from sleep deprivation! I thought better to sleep as safely as possible together rather than have an accidental falling asleep together episode on the sofa or something x

@anonny55 yes I was concerned about sids to some degree, but as previous poster said I was more worried about falling asleep holding him in a chair or whilst rocking him - which is just so so so much more dangerous.

I got an adult sized cellular blanket for when I needed a cover and then wore nice thick pyjamas and fluffy socks. I never thought or worried about actually rolling on to him as didn't seem like I could do it when sleeping in a safe position, and I also felt like instinctively when baby wiggled I would half wake to check in on him. But you have to do what works for you and your baby and if co sleeping is not the thing then don't feel pressured to do that either!

I’ve mostly co slept with my daughter but there was times in the first 4 months I was able to get her into the next2me by warming up her mattress with a hot water bottle beforehand, wrapping her bedsheet around me during the day to make it smell of me and then also using white noise.I just wanted to share this incase you hadn’t already tried them.

We think ours found the next to me too big to start with, so ended up putting the moses basket in to the next to me until she outgrew it x