Hi everyone,
I'm a parent looking for some advice or shared experiences. I have an 11-and-a-half-year-old daughter, and lately, I’m finding it hard to manage the changes we’re going through at home.
She’s doing well in school—her grades are good, and she seems to stay on top of her work. But at home, she rushes through her homework just to get to her phone or to go hang out with two of her school friends. She usually spends an hour or two on her phone, and then wants to go out until it gets dark.
Physically, she’s quite developed for her age (around 5'3"), and despite us telling her she doesn’t need makeup, she still puts on light makeup when she can.
Over the past month or two, she’s been pushing more and more to stay out late, and honestly, it’s making us anxious. We worry about what she’ll want or push for in the next few years if things are already like this now.
We try to set boundaries—she gets about 2–3 hours a day on her phone and another 2–3 hours to go outside. But she clearly doesn’t like these limits and often gets angry or upset when we try to enforce them.
She does have some extracurriculars, like swimming twice a week, and she reads a bit, but it’s a struggle to manage screen time and her desire for independence without constant conflict.
If anyone’s been through something similar, I’d love to hear how you’ve handled it. Thanks in advance!