MIL has not acknowledged our child

[Newmummiee]

my husband fell out with his mil but didnt tell her just stopped talking to her, i tried and argued with him to make effort but he wouldnt change his mind.
His sister had a baby and then we had one, i felt guilty and wanted to meet them and also due to us both having children but i knew my husband would be annoyed so i ended up not meeting.
His mother has made zero effort though and hasnt even tried to make amends or see her grandchild.
i know deep down id be better off without them because they absolutely mistreat my husband to his sister, so i know full well my child would get the same and id just be left heart broken.
Anyway has anyone else had this issue and how did they heal mentally as I am torn constantly.
i think one of the other issues is that I dont have a proper family of my own from my parents or sister.
my dad can not be bothered and my mum will only meet if her partner is fishing and my sister never replies so Ive never had a proper family that cares.

Why are you torn? You’ve said she mistreats her son
your DH sounds strong to have cut her off
good for him

His mil? Do you mean his mum?
Why Haa he fallen out wuth her?

You can’t be no contact with her and then expect her to acknowledge you. It sounds as if your husband has made the right decision to cut her off due to her abuse/mistreatment. You need to accept that decision. You need to change your mindset. You do have a proper family - your partner and baby are a real family.

This is your husband’s decision to make on behalf of what he thinks is best for his family. You shouldn’t be interfering. Your Dh by the sound of it has decided to go NC. Respect that and focus on your family together. You can certainly see why he wouldn’t want her around your child based on how little effort she’s put into trying to heal the relationship and how she treats her daughter. You don’t want that for your child.

It sounds like you’ve probably long been a people pleaser in your own family who has danced around to everyone’s tune trying to keep everyone happy. Don’t try to do the same with his family. Focus on your child and build a relationship with the sister and cousin if they are open to that. You get to do things differently in your family now. You don’t have to allow all these same old patterns to repeat themselves for your dc.

Thank you
i think this is my problem, self worth is quite hard for me