Ideas for child care / sleep options at my wedding???

[Laalaalala]

Apologies if it’s in the wrong category I didn’t know where else to post

my son is 2 now and very hard work, tantrums, won’t leave me alone, only wants me etc. we are deciding whether to get married next sept 2026 so he would be 3.5 or the year after so maybe 4+

ideslly we would like next year. Now we are having a small registry office wedding, then an evening party, no sit down meal etc. my family and friends will be at the party and enjoying themselves, I don’t know whether to wait til my son is 4 so might tolerate a one off later night or do it next year.

I wouldn’t want or expect my family to watch him as such as they want to enjoy their night as do I and my partner. Problem is my partners family live abroad so I know my son wouldn’t know them enough to feel comfortable with them eg if his mum who would want to put him to sleep he wouldn’t allow

we arent staying over night, it’s approx 5 miles from home the venue. Nursery don’t allow staff to do extra outside work. I looked at a wedding nanny but as they are strangers I wouldn’t fancy them driving away to my home with my son. We don’t have any babysitters other than who would be at the wedding.

I want to enjoy my night and not be holding a toddler etc. do I take a pram and hope he sleeps in the pram on the night til we leave?? Or has anyone used wedding Nannie’s before and been ok? So conflicted

A pram would make sense if next year but he may surprise and enjoy the party. If you hire someone to take him back home then I would start using them a fee months before so he gets use to them. You could also hire a baby sitter and get his use to them beforehand

Start using a baby sitter regular so they get to know him

Ds2 was 4 when we got married (only just). If I could do one thing again it would absolutely have been to hire a nanny for the wedding.

He was great all day until about 8pm. Then he hit a wall. Exhausted but wouldn't sleep. A family member was supposed to be in charge of the dc - one who had absolutely insisted it would be their pleasure, they really wanted to, they don't really drink anyway, would be happy to leave and take dc back to the room when needed etc - they were a bottle of wine deep, on the dancefloor by 7pm 🙄 Which left dh and me looking after him (elder dc was 6 and fully enjoying the party, right until the early hours).

Definitely hire a nanny. And should any well-meaning family member offer to do it, firmly turn them down ime.

i took a pushchair for my 2yo twins to sleep in at a friend’s wedding. My 5yo used it for an hour’s nap and someone else’s 3yo. My 2 yos partied hard all night until midnight on the dance floor in their onesies 😂 they feel asleep on the way home and we lifted them into bed.

If it was my own wedding, I’d arrange some kind of childcare but many dc will want you if you’re in the room so it’s tricky whether age 3 or 4.

Is the party venue at a hotel? Or pub with rooms. Maybe you could hire a room for use while you're there plus a nanny, then they'll be on site.

I think I might need to hire the nanny and meet her/use her often before then otherwise the thought of a randomer driving him to my house for bedtime is terrifying as we aren’t staying over somewhere.

Knowing my son I don’t think he would sleep if music playing he would just cry for me like he does now, who knows if it will be better by then but doubt it.

thank you all - glad I have got others saying it is worthwhile. I know my partner would be useless and wanting to enjoy himself like me so nanny is looking the best option!

We got married when dc 1 was 12 months. We had a wedding nanny and then I coslept with baby from 1am onwards and nanny took over 9am next day.

i have a 4 yo now. If we got married now I would leave him for a weekend with a play friends mum for the night eg best friend from nursery or school who he plays with a lot. I’ve done that recently as childcare and he just thought it was a great play date.

It would be at a pub / venue but they don’t have rooms unfortunately or I would have got one just for this reason. Due to that and us living less than 5 miles it just makes sense for us to come home that night. Plus we are trying to keep costs down and will have family visiting from abroad etc

Might be worth asking nursery if they’d make an exception in the circumstances. They can only say no?

I think this is a great idea.