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Original poster

3 month old nightmare sleeper

14 replies

Khalilsmama · 09/04/2025 21:02

this is going to be a long one so thank you for reading!

So my 3 month old struggles with silent reflux. Has squirmed all night long since the day he was born. Not the usual newborn grunting. The type that wakes him from his sleep crying. he is medicated on 5mg omeprazole which tbh don’t know if its doing anything it’s been over a month. I also exclusively breastfeed n have cut out allergens to be safe since he was 1 week old.

he has always been rocked to sleep pacing the house but will need constant resettling after 5-10 minutes which ends in a 20/30 min nap that he wakes from screaming. He is a big boy. Around 7kg, I however am now 6 stone after losing 2 since giving birth to him due to how demanding he is and breastfeeding.

i’m now at a point where I struggle to keep rocking him or hold him in a sling because of his weight and because I am becoming more fragile (sciatica doesnt help either). His sleep is awful all night and then I spend my whole day rocking him back to sleep constantly. Im starting to feel very unwell.

any advice on how to get him to self settle? He refuses a dummy, hates the pushchair and car seat. Even tried settling him in the rocker. He just starts screaming when hes tired. I feel trapped in my house because of this too.

I am exhausted and it just isn’t sustainable to go on like this when I have a toddler to tend to too.

would appreciate any advice. Has anyone gone through similar? TIA x

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Original poster

Khalilsmama · 09/04/2025 21:03

Forgot to also mention my 2 year old is up all night screaming because of his molars. So me and my partner literally have one child each with terrible sleep. So noone to hand my 3 month old too at night to catch up on sleep.

OP posts:

ScaryM0nster · 09/04/2025 21:05

Put him in the seat bit of the pram, so he’s on a slight incline. Accept he hates it initially. Walk it til falls asleep. If wakes when stop, but a rockit.

The slope will help with the reflux.

Get yourself large packets of bourbon biscuits unless you’re also gluten free. If you’re gluten and dairy free and struggling to maintain your weight ask health visitor for dietician support.

LuluDelulu · 09/04/2025 21:05

Oh bless him. And you. When you say you cut out allergens, have you tried milk, soya and egg together? Those are massively common causes of reflux related allergic reactions. It honestly does sound like he’s physically uncomfortable and they then use BF to soothe the pain. Makes it very tricky for you of course.

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TheLovleyChebbyMcGee · 09/04/2025 21:10

I'm sorry you are going through this it's really hard.

My first child was like this, he's now 6.5 and I thought I was going to die due to sleep deprivation, sounds dramatic but it was the worst 8 months of my life.

It will not last forever. I promise, although it feels like it.

With hindsight he was lactose intolerant and had silent reflux, I wish I'd badgered the doctors more. Ranitidine really helped, but that isn't available anymore, but simply, he just got older and started sleeping better around 9 months. At that point he'd only be up a few times a night rather than ever 45 minutes.

TheLovleyChebbyMcGee · 09/04/2025 21:14

Oh and as they like being in the sling and you are struggling with keeping them rocked, I found that a yoga ball was useful to sit on. You can bounce gently and rock your body but still take the weight off your feet and back

Original poster

Khalilsmama · 09/04/2025 21:32

@ScaryM0nster I did try this. Multiple times and he would just scream until he was sweating and choking. I even have the rockit. He just will not fall asleep in it. I really wish he did.

and thank you for the bourbon suggestion x

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Original poster

Khalilsmama · 09/04/2025 21:34

@LuluDelulu yes so I cut out dairy egg and soy as my first boy was allergic to these too. Found out the hard way.

trying to figure out if there is something else in my diet causing him this pain is so so stressful x

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Original poster

Khalilsmama · 09/04/2025 21:35

@TheLovleyChebbyMcGee so sorry you experienced this too! It’s honestly awful! Nice to read that things will get better. Thank you for the yoga ball recommendation. Ordered it for next day delivery on amazon x

OP posts:

KvotheTheBloodless · 09/04/2025 21:38

DS was like this, it is SO hard, I really feel for you.

We bought an apnea monitor and put him down on his tummy rather than his back - it worked really well, and he actually managed to get in a few 90 minutes blocks of sleep.

Soonenough · 09/04/2025 21:42

I was going to say try to elevate the top part of anything he is lying on too . I put a wedge pillow under the cot mattress , the pram mattress and used the seat upright. Used a dummy too. Sorry to hear it hasn't worked for you. Perhaps ask GP for a different medication if it's not making a difference. It really is a trial and error thing . So hard to listen to them crying like that .

Feb85 · 09/04/2025 22:43

Hi @Khalilsmama my first born DD also suffered with terrible reflux and was on omeprazole from a few weeks old, If I remember right I had to go back to the GP every couple of weeks to get her dosage increased as babys weight increases then the dosage needs to increase where it finally stabilised at 10mg so not sure if this will be the case for you but maybe worth a visit since you said they are on 5mg a month now. My DD was on this until she was 6months and then gradually started to reduce it under GPs advice I think starting solids also helped. I also held her upright for 30/45 mins after every feed which meant a lot of contact napping in the day so maybe a sling may help as you are also busy with your toddler, i had next to me on an incline, raised the back of mattress in bassinet, she also hated the car seat but she never got passed that. She still woke quite regularly but once her omeprazole was right i would usually get a couple of hrs blocks at night and it definitely took that look of pain she was in out of her little face.

Feb85 · 09/04/2025 22:46

Sorry I just read again and you mentioned about the sling maybe a baby rocker or chair with slight motion help at times in the day

ScaryM0nster · 09/04/2025 22:56

Shame about the pram. Definitely worth trying again every few weeks.

Yoga ball and sling combo is good.

I assume you’ve got the anbesol / paracetamol / ibuprofen combo going on the molars.

Napping yourself with the child in the sling kept me alive. Also, ask friends. We’re all worried about being seen to impose, and most will tell you to get stuffed if they can’t help.

Feb85 · 09/04/2025 23:00

Forgot to also mention we did try a cranial osteopath for her it was our HV who recommended it not sure if it helped but it definitely didn’t cause her any more discomfort so we found it was no harm to try it as our borough in London at the time provided it as a service to parents with children with reflux and pay a donation, not sure if this is something you could or would want to look into

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