Baby won't let dad do bedtime

[Mamaof2littles]

Anyone have any tips on how to get dad involved in bed time, as soon as its dark and she's in her bag she just gets so upset if it's not me. She's 10 months old so I understand it's normal but I'm going to a comedy show on Wednesday night and really worried she will just be upset and not go to sleep! I'm already stressed and on the verge of cancelling.she is breastfed but happily takes a bottle but just does not want anyone but me come bedtime.

He will figure out a way. He may have to wander around holding her, take her out for a walk in the pram or sling or sit on the sofa and cuddle her to sleep but he will make it work.

She prefers you but you and your DH are the ones preventing him from doing bedtime.

He just needs to do it and accept that at first she will cry/scream. That is the only way it will eventually improve.

@inks aww I know I'm just a softy, when she cries I just take over cos I don't like her being sad

The worst that can happen is she won't sleep, her dad can just handle it. As pp said he can cuddle her, take her our for a walk, she won't come to any harm.
Enjoy your evening out, and don't be tempted to phone home.

You need to stop taking over so she gets used to dad. It’s not fair on her or your husband if you keep taking over & don’t allow them their own time

Has he ever managed to put her down for a nap? I think that's the place to start. He will find a way and eventually she will be tired enough. She might also be absolutely fine if she's can't see/smell you in the house!

Just stop doing that and she'll become accustomed to Dad at bedtimes. Yes you're a softy and loving Mum but you're not being fair to either of them at the moment. Buckle up Mama - you can do it!💐

Agree with PP above. Moving forward, what worked for us was doing it together, we both get her changed into pjs, I sort milk/teeth/book, we both sit with her and DP reads the story. We can both do each others jobs too and we occasionally alternate, so when one of us is away, bedtime is easier for her to accept. We have done this since she was born and bedtime has never really been an issue, bar standard toddler tantrums of course 😂

@Hadalifeonce I suppose it is only one night and I don't ever really do anything anymore!

@yeesh in my defence my husband is often the one to say she won't sleep for me and it too sad or agrees with me so it's not all me, and she absolutely loves him through the day! He can do all the playing and routine leading up to bedtime

@PickledElectricity yes she will let him nap her!

@BearyNiceEars this was what it was like with my son! Think we've shot ourselves in the foot cos we used to share responsibilities with him and he'd go down for dad no bother. Then when we had our daughter he kinda took more responsibility with our son while I bf the baby. He'd do all the night wakes with my son cos I'd be bf the baby 45 times a night 😂

Honestly, by doing this you are teaching her that her dad is someone who she can’t get comfort from. That it must be you.

Now is the time to change that.

A 10 month old does not get to ‘let’ her parents do or decide anything. Neither does a 10 year old.
Butt out, make Dad do it for a fortnight. Stay downstairs or better still leave the house. She will get used to it.