iPads and tablets?

[OptimisticRealist2024]

I'm pregnant and not a proper parent yet. Zero judgement here; just curiosity.

My brother's kids only have access to YouTube when DB puts it on the big telly for them - they don't have their own devices.

DH's DB's kids all have their own devices (age range 4-8) and I don't understand why.

If you bought one for your child, what motivates you to buy one?

Again, I'm not judging - each to their own. Just thinking about wildly different approaches and why people do things differently.

To answer your question: I feel iPads have really good videos for children’s learning which they use such as ones for reading and basic maths. My daughter does her homework on her iPad. Ks2 seem to get lots of online homework and resources to research on so good for that. But truthfully they also let me have a break! They watch YouTube kids whilst I cook or clean and keeps them busy, I do feel guilty but it does let me get in with chores. I think if you can put parental locks and stuff on they’re good. I do sometimes wish I hadn’t let youngest have it but I do for my sanity. Also when you get ones see older ones use they want one. Try to be stricter than I was! But they are useful.

You might find this thread interesting OP

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/5304157-to-wish-id-never-bought-my-children-ipads?page=4&reply=143176457

I think parents just like the ready made entertainment. Us personally, our dc (now 7 & 12) have never had a tablet except for travel. It’s very useful on long train journeys or on the plane or if you are say visiting childfree family who don’t really have a child-friendly house and you need to just keep them sat safely somewhere where they won’t get into anything or fall into a well.

Otherwise, day to day normal use, mine have never had them. They are more trouble than they’re worth.

@iCantStopppEatinggg That's interesting - I didn't think of homework! Can well understand why younger children seeing older ones would be a headache.

DH's DB's kids are constantly glued to theirs - can't get through dinner time without it - which I think is too far the other way.

@Rainallnight I saw that thread just after I posted this one! I hope it doesn't turn to a pile-on. I have a feeling lots of parents don't know what to have done for the best.

Which is sort of what I was wondering: if it's an "active" yes - this will be a positive thing to do (which it could be, preparing children for a life that has one foot firmly online, homework, digital skills).

Or, is it a "passive" yes - where the disadvantages outweigh the positives (better that they have one and know how to use it safely than to totally deny them).

I used to work on online safety years ago - before Brexit/Trump/Musk/the world went really bananas. I could just get my head around it then at 20 years old. I didn't even have a smartphone until that job. I had to pay a small mortgage to open the internet on my phone before then - that utopia just doesn't exist any more.

The thought of what people are up against now, and how they're supposed to navigate it as parents with their children, is mad. I can see why it's such a binary issue.

I own one which I allow DD7 to borrow for times tables practice, homework and a bit of Minecraft at the weekend (2 x 30 minutes). I've never felt the need to buy her her own, although I will get her a laptop for secondary school. If she claims to be bored I tell her to read a book or let her figure out a way of entertaining herself.

We bought my 4 yo a tablet for Christmas. She's at school now and she was using my tablet for some phonics games. My tablet was old and the kids area didn't work and it wasn't going to long before she could move herself away from the kids apps to everything else so we thought it would be better she had her own tablet that we could tightly control so we both got new tablets at Christmas.
As well as phonics and letter games she uses ceebees and some colouring games. We are quite strict with the usage. She has a handful of apps that she can access, no access to the internet or YouTube. I've just checked her usage over the last couple of weeks she has had it for between 10 and 40 minutes a day 1-3 times a week. She probably used it a bit more in January when it was still a novelty.

She doesn't get a great deal of TV time. There's a few shows on BBC she likes that are all basically 10 minutes snapshots into other peoples lives or topsy and tim/biff chip and kipper. She's not really into cartoons we were restrictive with some when she was little as she never got her fill and always wanted more whereas with the other shows she happily turns them off after two episodes or so. She really enjoyed watching the Olympics especially the diving and the gymnastics so she likes watching those on YouTube. If she's having longer time with the TV she has them, or junior bake off or great pottery showdown that sort of thing.

We allow DS 2 to watch his iPad a few hours a day.

To be honest most of the things he watches are quote educational. I've learnt a lot about planets from it!

As long as it doesn't become a problem ( screaming when it's time to turn off) I actually see nothing wrong with them

Our DDs don't have iPads/tablets because we don't have them (not for any reason I've just never needed one so never spent the money!)

They do watch TV but not uncontrolled YouTube - mainly iplayer and Disney plus. They've only ever used my phone for iplayer when getting a haircut.

Also I don't subscribe to the 'its educational' excuse (for toddlers/preschoolers anyway) my 3y8m DD has just started reading and writing three letter words. Books, puzzles and conversation are educational too....

There are no tablets in our household only on journeys longer than 3-4 hours (car, train, plane)- movies and shows downloaded from Netflix.

YouTube isn't allowed in hour home. We are a bilingual family, and I tried to use YouTube to help with the languages. I allowed them to watch different videos and they got obsessed! Silly things like toy unboxing and all these crap (made for children, but they are very weird) kept poping up, and my kids only wanted to watch those. Since I banned YouTube, we don't have tantrums in the house. Best decision I ever made.