Before I explain my story I would just like to say this post is for genuine advice and comes from a caring mum of 2, absolutely no hate towards other parties as like I said, I am a mum myself and always think of the other side.
Me and my ex got back in touch many years ago and decided to make a go of things, the reason it stopped the first time was me coming out of a long term relationship (my first ever relationship) I wasn’t ready for another one.
Roughly 3 months into seeing each other, we find out his most recent ex was pregnant through a message she has sent to him. I assured him if he wants to proceed with this pregnancy, and even resume the relationship with her I would support him as a partner or even a friend as we always kept in touch. He explained their relationship was very toxic, he wasn’t ready to be a dad and did not plan this with her. He explained how he was feeling about it all, and she decided to continue the pregnancy. Which is absolutely her choice.
I completely understand it takes two to tango, and there was clearly no protection used.
I did keep out of it as I can imagine how she must have been feeling in that situation. I did receive a lot of verbal abuse from her and friends with no retaliation from me, and still kept out of it.
There was no communication between both after the initial conversation about how he felt etc and she never responded.
Fast forward 6 years, she is requesting a DNA, not to proof he is the father as she is 100% sure but to prove it to her little one and isn’t expecting anything from this.
As a mother myself I believe when the results come in, if it is positive I do believe that child support would be put in place, and whatever else they both decide going forward. If contact should be made etc.
They live 5 hours away, she has had other men around her and called 1 dad, they are separated but she had another child with this man, also been told she’s had a confusing life which worries me (for the child) that this is going to confuse them more?
Just wondering what everyone else thinks of the situation and how to navigate it with everything.
Personally I am finding the situation quite challenging mentally which is why I have turned to this post, I feel guilty about struggling when I’m the last person people should be thinking about but I am 3 months PP so emotions are high.
Once again, please no hate.