Cuddling 5 year old to sleep

[Isitreasonable]

I was just reading another post from someone at the end of their tether with their 5 year olds night time routine. It seems that their 5 year old, like many, is put to bed and expected to get themselves to sleep. I know this is quite common, and many will drift off!

My eldest has just turned 5 and they coslept with me until little sibling arrived 16 months ago, it was the only way to get any sleep when he was a baby and we just kept it going.

Now, I feed the baby to sleep and DP does book with our eldest in bed, then lays with him in bed listening to an audibook until he falls asleep.

It’s only just occurred to me that maybe we should teach him how to go to sleep alone, or will it happen naturally?

He is very scared of the dark and will still wake in the night a few times a week and want dad or myself in with him, which we are ok with as we know it won’t last forever.

Thoughts?

Mine were the same. Eldest is 11 now and just goes to bed. Never forced it, just grew out of needing us there to fall asleep. I can’t even remember when really.

Youngest is 5 and we tend to stay but there’s additional needs at play. We sometimes leave him as he’s drifting off and he stays and falls asleep.

Both occasionally wake up at night and climb in with us. Very rare now with the oldest.

Not many will agree I imagine, but I see no issue at all with this. They’re not little for long.

My 4 year old had always had 1 of us lying with him until he falls asleep. It usually takes about 10 mins. He then wakes up and comes in with us at some point in the night but no fuss, just creeps in and straight back to sleep.

However, lately, he has been wanting to stay awake at bedtime and 'be on his own' listening to his tonies box. He comes down, we have a cuddle, he goes back up. I think he's naturally moving away from us lying with him while he falls asleep but we're in no hurry to make him fall asleep on his own - we're guided by him on this! If he needs it we'll keep doing it until he naturally grows out of it - I'm assuming by 18 he'll be over it!!

If you're happy with how things are, then no need to change anything! It wouldn't work for me, but we're all different and that's doesn't mean either way is wrong. It sounds like it works for you and your family.

Everyone has a different view on this and you have to do what is right for you. Personally this wouldn't work me and my 2 children have slept independently since they were old enough to go into their cot. We have a consistent bedtime routine and when the door closes, they know it is time for sleep and (for the most part) just close their eyes. My oldest now has a night light just bright enough so the room isn't completely dark as was waking up scared in the night but this helped her sleep through again. No advice on whether it will just happen naturally and when though

It may not happen naturally.

my SIL coslept with her eldest. He still wanted to be cosleeping as a teen because he was very anxious. She had 5 other kids by then and it was a bit of a problem because they all wanted to cosleep with mum.