Autistic 4 year old

[Lexi90]

Hi guys I’m a single mum to a 4.5 year old that has been diagnosed with level 3 autism and she is non verbal. My daughter refuses to go to the toilet. I can get her to sit on there but she just won’t go. Has anyone else had this issue and when did your little one start to use the toilet? We use visual cards and I don’t use pull up nappies on her at home. I’m worried because she is starting school next year

Later toilet training is very common in autistic children. Have a look at ‘interoception’. She may not have awareness of her bladder and bowels yet.

Thanks for your reply. I’ll look into it

Is she going to send school? They will be amazing with her, she will develop in her own time and only when she’s happy comfortable and ready.

Don't push it before she's ready. If she's nor really aware of what's going on in her body theb you won't get anywhere.

Does she like books? We had a stack of 5 books about going to the loo (I remember one called "Everybody poos") and would spend 10 minutes 1-3 times a day with DC sitting on the potty bare bum and have potty story time, then wash hands and have a chocolate button. No pressure for anything to happen. Eventually it did. Autistic DC nevertheless found the whole concept of pushing a poo out and then it getting flushed away a little bit disconcerting at first. Lots of reassurance and praise needed.

Remember schools are used to this. If she goes to a SEN school I doubt they have any expectations of a 4yo being potty trained. If it's a mainstream school they aren't allowed to discriminate on disability and being a bit later to potty train is perfectly usual with ASD.

You’ve had some really lovely and useful replies already. I just wondered if you’ve found the SN Children Section yet?

What is “SN children’s section”?

Thank you to everyone for taking the time to reply. I’m a first time mum and I appreciate all the help I can get. ❤️

There’s a Special Needs Section on MN. Includes things like SN Chat and SN Children.

The section contains helpful MNers who have experience of ASD and SN and are usually very helpful.

Helpfully the threads in this section don’t show up in the Active Threads so you don’t usually get MNers with no experience of ASD commenting

Hello!
I know this is an older post now but I'm having the same thing with my level 2 autistic grandson. Just wondering what you guys have found to be helpful. My grandson is too tall to sit on a potty now and hates the toilet because of the flush. Public loos are definitely out because of the suddenness and noise of the hand dryers. Many thanks!

@TattyBluebellwould using the diabled toilet when out help?

Hi Im still unable to get her to actually do her business in the toilet. I brought her a mini seat to go over the toilet with a matching stool. It’s purple and has mini mouse on it. I can get her to sit on there with her pants down. That’s about it. We just have been stuck here for ages.

Don’t be too hard on yourself. My DD will be 5 in November, she also has ASD and is non verbal, she goes to a Specialist Support Base within a mainstream school and I haven’t even attempted to toilet train her yet!
She literally has no concept of bladder/bowel movements and just isn’t ready, this has been confirmed by everyone who’s worked with her, sometimes these things just take a bit longer. Please don’t worry x

It might do, thank you! Do they have hand dryers in them?

My daughter is severely autistic and non verbal. She toilet trained at 6. But just did it straight away at that point. Don’t fret, she will get there x

My asd son is 5 and still not there yet either, hang in there xx

They do usually but you can choose not to use them

Are you in the states?

Also 4 is young for an autistic child with high support needs to crack toilet training