what should i do?

[starlover]

I had a place to start my midwifery training last september, but fell pregnant. I deferred for a year so am due to be starting this september.
Recently the University called me to make sure I still want my place, and I said yes, even though I don't know if I will actually be able to take it up.
My baby is due on the 25th and will only be about 7 months when I start Uni.
Am I mad to even think about starting a course with a little baby????? This is a full time course, with shift work as well....
I am wondering if I should just tell them that I don't want the place so that they can offer it to someone else...
Advice pleeeeeeeease!!!!!!!

[starlover]

I want to do the course really, really badly. I do have a great support network and I know my family and friends and of course dp would do everything they could to make it work for me... BUT, I am worried that I'm going to miss out on a lot of the baby's first few years. I don't want to look back on the time and wish that I had left it til s/he was older.
were you working full time sally? how did you find it? good luck with your application btw fingers crossed!

[miranda2]

I was studying for a degree full time when I got pg, ds was born in hte summer hols and started nursery at 5months (would have put him in earlier but the local nurseries wouldn't take them younger). Did the next 2 years with him in nursery fulltime. Worked fine. To be honest, its later (post 3) that it makes more difference you spending time with them, in my opinion. I'd go for it - then by the time your baby is 3/4 you'll be qualified and can work full or part time. If you wait til they start school to train you'll never do it!

[Beansmum]

do it! I came back to uni full time when ds was 4 months, it has been quite tough so far but I think that if I hadn't started so early then I probably wouldn't have gone back at all. And I would rather get my degree done now while ds doesn't really need me around so that I can be there for him later on.

[starlover]

Thank you for the advice... I do really wanna do this, as if I leave it I will have to apply again and go through the whole interview process and everything again.
I think I will wait 'til a bit later in the year before I make a definite decision because I know that even if I decide not to go they will still have people they can offer the place to.
The only other thing is that I have to go and have a session with the Occupational Health person because of my previous probs with depression and self-harm. I saw one lady and she seemed pretty positive, but she said they would need a full medical report from my GP. Then they said I would have to go and have another interview with someone else about it.... so i might not even get my place after all if they decide I am not fit!

[Ellbell]

Good luck Starlover!
I've had several personal tutees who've had problems with depression and at least one who was also self-harming. My experience is that, once you're in, people will bend over backwards to help you. This may be what they meant when they said that they'd need a doctor's letter... that they'd need medical evidence in order to be able to help you cope in the best possible way. (This is an issue with things like depression because sometimes students try to cover it up and don't ask for help until the problem has got really really serious...) Obviously it may be slightly different on a course like midwifery than on a classroom based course, but when you see the OT you need to stress that you have good support networks and that, most importantly, YOU feel you can do it.
Very best of luck with it all...

[starlover]

thanks ellbell, that's reassuring. The lady I spoke to before said they just wanted to make sure I would be ok on the course, and that they would make sure I had a counsellor and stuff that I could talk to so that once I start I already have things in place should it all go to pot!
I am quite positive that my GP will say good things about me... maybe I'm worrying about nothing!