Newborn chest sleeping ..

[KMG30]

Hi ladies

I KNOW it is completely unsafe so I don’t need them comments lol

anyone who had a newborn that’s just won’t settle on their back in the crib or even co sleeping on their back, but sleeps like an angel on your chest.. what the hell do you do ?

I saw a post on Instagram by happy cosleepser I think she’s called with a video/ instructions on how to best chest sleep in the safest way.

it’s totally normal for them to want to sleep like that. With my first me and my husband slept in shifts for the first six weeks until she’d sleep next to me in bed following the safe sleep 7 - is that an option for you?

Hi OP. It’s the lesser safe option of cosleeping for sure, and do keep trying to get baby on their back, but chest sleeping on you isn’t the same risk as chest sleeping alone in a cot as they’re getting the direct input of your breathing. I know Happy Cosleeper on Instagram has some helpful resources on this that might help you to look at?

I bedshared from birth with both my kids but they were willing to lie on the bed, though curled towards me rather than flat on their back for the first 6-8 weeks at least, you’ll probably find baby is more willing to go on the bed soon as long as you’re still close.

Something seems odd about this post ...

Baby has been inside you for 9 months where it was dark, warm and cozy, smelling you, hearing your voice, hearing your heart/blood flow/digestive system/placenta etc. A bare, quiet cot is completely at odds with everything they know to be safe. They are hardwired to seek comfort from a caregiver, because on an evolutionary level being left alone means you’re in danger of starving or being eaten by a sabre tooth tiger or whatever. Like all apes, human babies are designed to be carried and have free access to a breast, rather than being left in a nest like some other mammals (this can be demonstrated by fat content in breast milks of various species).

Basically, what I’m getting at is that your baby isn’t defective and is actually pretty clever when you think about it.

You have two realistic options here:
-Follow the safer co-sleeping guidelines IF you baby was born at term, weighing over 2.5kg, you are non-smokers, and neither you nor your partner take any medications/drugs/alcohol that you’ll make you drowsy.
-Replicate the womb as much as possible. Use your body heat to warm up a muslin or cot sheet and make it smell like you and then put it in the cot just before you transfer baby (if using a muslin, you need to make sure it’s safely tucked under the mattress). Swaddle baby using a thin blanket or zip up/velcro swaddle. Play white noise (quite loud) to try to replicate some of those womb sounds.

If the above aren’t enough to at least slightly improve things, start thinking about silent reflux as a possible cause.

We slept in shifts- I’d go to bed after the 7pm or 8pm feed and let DH sit up watching tv and patting babys bum to keep them asleep on his chest… when they woke he’d change nappy if needed and head to bed (11pm or midnight if I’d been lucky!) and give baby to me to feed and cuddle- sometimes I could slide baby from breast to chest then to lie next to me and cosleep… or have some broken sleep and on a bad night I’d give them back to DH at 6 for an hour before he’d need to get ready for work.
Patting bum, putting used muslin under baby etc all helped then eventually sleep a bit better and off the chest. Contact naps continued during the day for a good while though.

I remember a few weeks with summer born DS2 where I would sleep lying on my back with the sheets carefully tucked round the lower half of my body, and he would sleep on my chest, I think with a light cellular baby blanket over him and me holding him in place. That weird kind of semi- attentive new mum sleep....

@Redhotspicywine Hiya! We’re on week 6 now. She’s still so clingy haha. She will sleep next to me in bed but then she makes all sorts of noises and grunting, wakes herself up with the noises. On my chest she’ll sleep very well. Me and my partner was doing shifts for the first 4 weeks but now he’s back at work it is a bit impossible as he works crazy hours.

@BuffaloCauliflower Thank you!! I have followed her. The babies slept quite well last night next to me (It’s twins! 😂) the first part of the night baby girl was on my chest for a good few hours before the first feed, then after that feed she has been fine laying flat. I think the first chest bit settles her for the night ❤️ but I can’t sleep when she’s on my chest. I wake up in shock thinking I’ve dropped her! But I haven’t lol first time mum here 🥹

@Chilliflakesontuna what is weird?

I have loads of friends who chest slept their colic babies. For me, this seems way less dangerous than co- sleeping.

If you are worried, you should buy an Owlet sock that will alarm you if your baby oxygen drops.

I have the solution to this! Maybe...

DD used to like falling asleep on my chest. But instead of taking her up to bed, I would let her fall asleep on my chest after dinner, while I was sitting on the sofa (I was totally awake! Co sleeping in sofas is dangerous of course).

I would use the time / entertain myself with a computer or a book, or the TV. And every evening she would snuggle and sleep on my chest. It was the most lovely time, I absolutely treasured it. And then when I was ready to go to bed later on, we'd go up to bed together and co-sleep in bed. We had a three sided cot that attached to the bed but mainly she co-slept next to me.

It wasn't a time when a lot of housework got done! But it really was lovely.

If she'd been my first there's no way I would have done this. I would have been too worried about not doing things the right way, or trying to teach my baby "good habits" or something.

But by the time I had my second, I worried less about how you "should" do things and found that just going with the flow can sometimes work out great.

Luckily she would sleep flat once she'd been asleep for a while. I'm not sure what I would have done if that wasn't an option though.