Seeking some really gentle advise please as we are really struggling with this!
My DD is in year 4 at primary. She has a little friend, they've been like 2 peas in a pod for years. Recently when we were having a long car ride/chat DD broke down crying and said she doesn't like this girl anymore. The girl can be controlling (we've known that for a while) telling DD who she can and can't play with. But DD is apparently fed up now, she wants to play with different friends. The girl doesn't share her interests anymore, the girl has a nasty streak, DD is very sensitive and doesn't like this.
I thought it was fairly straightforward - we told DD to stop playing with the girl. We set up some playdates with other friends.
But she is still struggling so much! Just had another day today where DD has come home and said she 'played with' this girl all day. Gently probed, and she revealed the girl follows her around the playground, while DD apparently tried to find others to play with. I've told DD she can walk away, or politely say she doesn't want to play, or find an adult for help, but she just isn't managing to do this!
Part of me just thinks - what's all the fuss about then? If DD is spending all day with this girl, then clearly they are friends? But then DD gets so upset when she talks about it, I err towards thinking she is really being manipulated (possibly bullied?) by this girl. I know the girl has instructed DD to lie to me before about who she has played with, for example.
DD is overjoyed when this girl isn't at school, so I have to believe her that she really doesn't want the friendship. But I can't help but wonder, why the flip doesn't she just walk away then!
Does anyone have any experience of a similar type of friendship dynamic in primary? How did you help your child??