I was contacted by a social worker today

[gollyimholly]

Yesterday my DD burnt her fingers on a hot stovetop https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/childrenshealth/5291681-toddler-burnt-her-fingertips-on-stovetop-recovery-questions?reply=142767113

Thankfully she is OK. The hospital contacted the local authorities/social worker department and I had a phonecall (which I missed) from a social worker. She left a voicemail and an email saying they have been alerted by the hospital that DD hurt her hand and how are we getting on at home. It was a friendly email and I replied with all the details about DD's injury and how she is doing and what the next steps are.

I am so crestfallen that the hospital think DD or our family require social worker input. DD is my whole world, DH is a doting dad and it is absolutely crushing us that we've been contacted by a social worker.

Does this mean they are going to be watching us as a family from now on? If a child has an accident with a stovetop at home or a burn injury is it an automatic referral by the hospital to a social worker? Or do the hospital suspect DH and I are bad parents? DH and I both come from families where there have never been any involvement of social services and we have no experience of what this might mean. We both feel terrible that this is happening. I cried with worry all of last night about DD's hand but ever since today's email I am even more sick with worry. Could this result in DD being taken from us? We are a stable couple, DH has a good job, we have a nice home, no drugs, we don't swear. We are trying desperately hard to give DD a good life and I can't believe we are now in contact with a social worker.

Other details that I wonder if they are relevant :
When we took DD to hospital last night, we were all a mess. DD had been crying a lot and she also is recovering from a cold. Together, he face was very tear and snot stained. I wonder if she looked very unkempt.

I was wearing a dress with buttons all the way down the front but where I was carrying DD from the car park into the building and DD was crying from pain, a good few of my buttons came undone and so my dress was undone from crotch down, I was wearing very dark tights. And I didn't notice. When DH came in from parking the car, he noticed and did up my buttons. I wonder if I looked completely deranged to the doctor and he referred us at that point.

I am having therapy at the moment for birth trauma and I wonder if the hospital saw my notes and thought as a mum with mental health problems and a toddler with this type of injury, they need to alert the social services.

We haven't taken DD to see the HV in a very long time and only took her during any mandatory appointments. But this is because last year DD was in hospital a lot for a rare genetic condition and so she was under regular medical attention (at another hospital to the one we took DD to last night) and so we were reassured her health/developmental milestones were all being addressed whilst we were under their care. But I wonder if the hospital we went to last night did not know this and then saw a toddler who hasnt been to the HV in a long time and has assumed neglectful parents.

My questions are:
Does anyone have any idea whether this referral by the hospital is triggered automatically or it's because they suspect DD is being neglected?

Could DD be taken from us?!

Are we on some kind of register now that will alert hospitals, doctors that social workers are involved with us?

Is this going to be permanently on DD's record? Would her future school know about it?

I would greatly appreciate any input from anyone who understands this system. I replied to the social workers email around 5.30pm today (I missed her call at 4.15pm) and so I haven't yet heard back what is happening.

You are understandably upset buty ou are massively over thinking this.

Your child had an injury and appropriately went to A&E.

Social services should always get alerted for these sorts of incidences. They have a duty to investigate and check things out and mostly they get closed with no follow up because everything is explainable and there have been protective measures put into place.

Please don't get yourself into a tizz.

Ime and this wax a while ago, SS are informed of any injury that could be suspicious. They didn't tell me it would happen, but I knew it would.

It's not normal practice to make referrals to children's services without informing the parents.

I wouldn't worry I had this when DD was a baby and rolled from the sofa on to a hard floor. It was a Friday night and we got a phone call on Monday. They asked how it happened and if everything was okay. I answered honestly and that's it, never heard from them again and it hasn't ever come up as a problem. She's a teenager now.
I was fully expecting a call when DS managed to fall over at my parents house and cut his head open on the TV stand. He needed stitches but didn't ever hear anything.
Don't worry OP, these things happen and you will more than likely never hear anything more.

You’re upset that there are systems in place in this country that follows up on children’s injuries to ensure they are safe going forward? That’s bonkers OP. Engage with the social worker and put the preventative measures in place at home that ensure it can’t happen again.

I do not think social service would call to reassure mother.

I had the same and no referal to my knowledge well at least if there was I didn’t hear about it. However now ds is older we’ve had a few safeguarding referals go in from police and a and e that I do know about where I could do with some help from ss (ds autistic and we are having difficulties) and still nothing so maybe our local social services don’t do anything with referrals or have a very high bar for contacting parents

OP my children have both been referred following accidental injury. One was a dog bite 😞 and one was a fall downstairs. On both occasions a social worker telephoned to ‘triage’ asked questions about the incidents and what measures we were planning to putin place to minimise the chance of similar happening again. We had already implemented a plan and shared this with them and both times, apart from a HV popping round a few weeks later to see how we were getting on, that was that.
its a system designed to allow social services to pick up patters of repeated injuries and take action to safeguard in those cases, not to remove children from otherwise perfectly competent and loving parents.

You should get a letter saying no further action.

Hospital contacted them when my son had sunburn, I took him to hospital because I thought he was having an allergic reaction - he had been at beach with grandparents and they missed a weird shaped patch on his back/arm with his factor 50.

Then, nursery reported a 'carpet burn' on my younger sons back - we had been at a caravan park, he had been sat on a high stool and slid of but it was rammed against the wall and left a small scab on his back. Again, I had told the nursery what had happened when I took him in, but the still called them.

As long as you have been honest with them, which you have been, accidents happen. I think Social Workers get a bad rep because of some of the children that have been missed or because everyone thinks if social are involved they will take your kids. They are actually really helpful and just want to support families that require it, the last thing they want to do is take a child from their family.

100% standard OP please don’t worry. Cooperate with the social worker. Be honest. They really don’t have the time and money to get involved with families who are doing a decent job of parenting.

Can you try and reframe this. Isn’t it brilliant that a system exists to support families and keep children safe. I am sure 9/10 referrals are for families like yours. Consider it more of a check in than anything.

Try and stop beating yourself up. Accidents do happen.

Same for me. I think it’s a good thing when a child injures themselves social services follow up.

OP this is automatic. Take a breath and stop spiralling and catastrophising. If you haven’t done anything wrong you will be fine.

Please don’t be alarmed. My DS touched a hot iron (having been told not to touch it as it was hot); also a folded chair fell on my DD and broke a toe; am sure there were more instances but each time I had a call from a HV and the GP the next day. Have also been investigated by SS in depth (completely different issue and they were, frankly, beyond lovely during the whole process after which I actually came out feeling reassured and that I was doing a good enough job after all).

It’s invasive but they are being very very careful in the current climate. I prefer to view it as a sign that they care about my (and every other) child enough to check in. It’s an opportunity to ask for parenting support if you feel you need it, but other than that they won’t likely intrude.

Just also popping on to say it’s an automatic referral from A & E in these circumstances - it happened to a friend of mine when her DD broke her leg just falling over a toy at home . Stop beating yourself up and ignore those criticising you about being understandably upset

Yes, 12 years ago

And what was your relationship like with this nursery that rather than make their own enquiry about a mark they went straight to a SS report?

No, never.

I'm glad to see other posters managed to calm you down last night, I just wanted to pop my thoughts down in case the anxiety has reared it's head again this morning.
I'd be a LOT more worried if you came into a&e with fresh make up, perfect dress, composed and non emotional. Accidents sadly happen hence the A in a&e and they likely will have referred as standard rather than any genuine concerns that you held the toddlers hand down and burnt her abusively.
Speak to the social worker and tell the truth, about what happened and about how you are coping. They have a reputation as child snatchers but in truth it takes a lot or a very serious obvious incident to remove a child and the main bulk of their job is to support families, they may be able to offer counselling etc

Big hugs to you all as I'm sure this was a terrifying incident and you'll feel the mum guilt for years it's just how good mums are built but forgive yourself it was an accident and as hard as you try you can't watch them every second

My LO had quite a nasty bump to head last year and we took him to A&E, which resulted in a follow up call from SS. To be honest, I expected the call for obvious reasons. She called and asked if we’re okay, how was LO and did we feel like we had enough support. It’s no big deal, just a safety net.

Think about it OP. Your DD may be from a loving and caring family and she just had a very unfortunate accident but thousands of children are not. A&E visit needs to be tracked and monitored for safeguarding reasons. How do they know your kid isn’t one of those unfortunate ones? They have to have a blanket procedure for all. Provided you don’t rack up visits or have any causes for concern then you will be fine. But imagine if they didn’t do this follow up? Far too many kids are slipping through the cracks as it is!

Said kindly, stop wallowing. Be grateful your child is ok and get on with your lives.

I have had repeatedly been falsely reported by a family member i have had 5 offical visits and it is horrifying and embarrassing. Im waiting for next visit. Honestly it is soul destroying. They close case same day everytime. They said ladt claim was beyond vexatious. But person can keep reporting me til they die.....

That's awful. Sorry to hear you've been through that. It must cause you untold distress and misery.

It's such a shame common sense can't be employed in today's world.

Reporting to social services is such a great tactic for malicious people

It was great, my older son had been their first child on the books when they opened, went there for 4 years, younger went for approx 6 months as his childminder decided on a change of career, so I put him in there for the 6 months before he started school. It was a new Manager though, she had only been there a few months.