I was contacted by a social worker today

[gollyimholly]

Yesterday my DD burnt her fingers on a hot stovetop https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/childrenshealth/5291681-toddler-burnt-her-fingertips-on-stovetop-recovery-questions?reply=142767113

Thankfully she is OK. The hospital contacted the local authorities/social worker department and I had a phonecall (which I missed) from a social worker. She left a voicemail and an email saying they have been alerted by the hospital that DD hurt her hand and how are we getting on at home. It was a friendly email and I replied with all the details about DD's injury and how she is doing and what the next steps are.

I am so crestfallen that the hospital think DD or our family require social worker input. DD is my whole world, DH is a doting dad and it is absolutely crushing us that we've been contacted by a social worker.

Does this mean they are going to be watching us as a family from now on? If a child has an accident with a stovetop at home or a burn injury is it an automatic referral by the hospital to a social worker? Or do the hospital suspect DH and I are bad parents? DH and I both come from families where there have never been any involvement of social services and we have no experience of what this might mean. We both feel terrible that this is happening. I cried with worry all of last night about DD's hand but ever since today's email I am even more sick with worry. Could this result in DD being taken from us? We are a stable couple, DH has a good job, we have a nice home, no drugs, we don't swear. We are trying desperately hard to give DD a good life and I can't believe we are now in contact with a social worker.

Other details that I wonder if they are relevant :
When we took DD to hospital last night, we were all a mess. DD had been crying a lot and she also is recovering from a cold. Together, he face was very tear and snot stained. I wonder if she looked very unkempt.

I was wearing a dress with buttons all the way down the front but where I was carrying DD from the car park into the building and DD was crying from pain, a good few of my buttons came undone and so my dress was undone from crotch down, I was wearing very dark tights. And I didn't notice. When DH came in from parking the car, he noticed and did up my buttons. I wonder if I looked completely deranged to the doctor and he referred us at that point.

I am having therapy at the moment for birth trauma and I wonder if the hospital saw my notes and thought as a mum with mental health problems and a toddler with this type of injury, they need to alert the social services.

We haven't taken DD to see the HV in a very long time and only took her during any mandatory appointments. But this is because last year DD was in hospital a lot for a rare genetic condition and so she was under regular medical attention (at another hospital to the one we took DD to last night) and so we were reassured her health/developmental milestones were all being addressed whilst we were under their care. But I wonder if the hospital we went to last night did not know this and then saw a toddler who hasnt been to the HV in a long time and has assumed neglectful parents.

My questions are:
Does anyone have any idea whether this referral by the hospital is triggered automatically or it's because they suspect DD is being neglected?

Could DD be taken from us?!

Are we on some kind of register now that will alert hospitals, doctors that social workers are involved with us?

Is this going to be permanently on DD's record? Would her future school know about it?

I would greatly appreciate any input from anyone who understands this system. I replied to the social workers email around 5.30pm today (I missed her call at 4.15pm) and so I haven't yet heard back what is happening.

I think that poster was suggesting that the hospital staff should have told her it was going to happen?

Every child is referred to their health visitor for an A&E attendances and a burn is an automatic safeguarding referral because it's the mechanism of injury.

Neglect etc. or letting your kid stand on straighteners is an issue but you can't pick and choose which paediatric burn needs social service referral so all paeds burns are referred to
Social services

Ah you’re right - past my bedtime!

I’m not sure if they do generally mention it, in case it’s giving abusers time to cover their tracks etc. Could be wrong though.

I always wonder this. I took my then 4 month old to a&e with significant unexplained bleeding from near his bum and never heard a word from the HV or sici services afterwards.

@DogsandFlowers the referral may well be appropriate - but whoever makes the referral should be transparent about that with parents.

@Kibble29 of course - and I hope that you tell parents that you are doing so to avoid it scaring the living daylights out of them as has happened to op

You poor thing. I just want to give you a hug!

I totally understand how you must be feeling. What a horrible shock. Adds insult to injury after your daughter's injury and the A&E attendance.

I know it's really really difficult to do... But try your level best not to overthink this. I get why and I can feel it through your messages. I would be the same. BUT, to you, this is your whole world, your whole life. To them , some social worker gets a ping on their system (probably one of many many MANY 'referrals' that working week ) they're so used to it, they know the proper 'red flag' cases and I hate to say it, but even those ones it takes often months or years and lots of hard evidence to actually remove the children who are in danger. Deep down, they know most of the time a legitimate safeguard from a 'box tick referral '. Yours is the latter. You've got so many 'protective factors '. They'll find nothing because there's nothing to find. Be absolutely reassured of that.

As for it staying on systems - I believe it has to somewhere. But I doubt very much it comes up as an 'alert' (it possibly does if a child is actively under the care of social services or on a protection plan ) I hope someone who is knowledgeable in this area will come along and clarify this. I would imagine if it's a historic thing you've got to be actively looking for it on a system to find it. And this bloody pointless referral will be 'historic' soon enough, especially when there's 'no further action'

I know you'll always get people on here saying how wonderful it is that every little thing is reported to build a picture blah blah but actually it causes untold anxiety stress and insecurity long term when unnecessary referrals are made. I know that's controversial, but it's how the system gets clogged up, whilst the really vulnerable children fall under the radar.

Sometimes I think more affluent or "normal" families are reported as they're easy targets. They won't cause he'll for the SW.

Also, it's very threatening how you're always told to "comply with everything. Do everything they say. Agree with everything" it's like you literally have no autonomy and the threat is hanging over some frightened parents head who's done nothing wrong, that it'll all be ramped up a gear if not.

Anyway, this is getting long. Please be semi reassured. The case will be shut. It'll likely just be a phonecall.

I'm sorry for your ordeal. Treat yourself well, be kind and compassionate towards yourself. These kind of things can often play into insecurities you already harbour, so try not to let that happen. Distract yourself as much as possible until it's all over. Best of luck x

Sorry tagged posters the wrong way round!

Thank you everyone for your reassuring answers. My head is absolutely ringing with anxiousness. I don't think I've ever been so nervous.

I agree, we are very lucky to be in a place where our children have these safety measures in place.

Also, it is a social worker who was in touch with me not a health visitor.

My DS was in hospital overnight last year due to an impacted colon. We had a follow up call from social care team then following day to see how we were as it was an a&e attendance. They said it was a support call and safety net.

@intrepidgiraffe you are wrong

They should mention it, but I agree it’s daft in some cases where you suspect abuse. I made a report to SS (as a nurse) without parental consent as I was concerned that a child was at risk of abuse from a parent, clearly outlining in my referral why I had deliberately not sought consent to refer, especially as the child had already been on the CIN register once but stepped down my referral was rejected because I hadn’t asked the parent’s permission, and SS stopped replying to my emails when I asked them to justify themselves in writing.

Just off the back of this, what if abuse (not life or death) is suspected (not in the OPs case but in a general sense)? Is that transparency still expected?

OP do not panic it’s all routine and a blanket policy and from what you say they really won’t be pursing it beyond a bit of a scoping exercise to check your DD is being cared for.

Any note on record would clearly show it to be a routine follow up of an accident.

But kindly, when things have settled please see your doctor/therapy team about how you reacted here. Your DD will get into all sorts of scrapes and accidents- that’s life. But your extreme reaction to this relatively minor event (albeit from a place of love for her) sounds really hard for you and you could absolutely benefit from some support for that in future.

Don't worry about it. Professionals are aware accidents happen. The hospital are just doing their jobs as a very young child has had a reasonably serious injury.

People come to A&E in all kinds of clothes, so I wouldn't worry.

Think of it this way- it's better to report this kind of thing everytime even if you don't suspect abuse, rather than the one time you don't and a child has been intentionally harmed.

They'll be looking at things like patterns (frequent A&E attendances), unusual bruises, injuries in strange places, repeated head injuries. A one off grazed head from falling off the bed is plausible. Head injuries every couple of weeks are suspect. A one-off burn to the hand happens because kids are curious. A burn on somewhere like the stomach would be more suspect.

Sorry this is nonsense intrepidgiraffe and if you are a SW you should know better!

@Kibble29 it depends on the nature of the suspected abuse, and what impact telling them parents would have on the child's safety, but children's services will rightly be very reluctant to accept a referral when it hasn't been discussed with parents.

It's understandable that people would be concerned about alerting parents to their concerns - but they'll find out anyway within a few days when a social worker contacts them, and it's much more important to try to work with parents to keep children safe wherever possible.

There is a perception that social workers can immediately take action to protect children via removal etc - but this is extraordinarily rare as a first step.

And apart from in the most extreme cases, parents need to give social workers consent to talk to other professionals, which they are less likely to do if bamboozled by a surprise referral.

Generally (there are exceptions) speaking with parents about concerns keeps children safer.

@sellotapechicken if it's routine in your area to automatically refer to children's services without explaining to parents you are doing this - this should be challenged.

I can believe it is done this way in some places, but that doesn't make it right.

We get notifications of all child injuries that are treated in A and E - they are followed up by the HV normally based on the type of injury. It’s normally a friendly how is DC and how can we help?

Unfortunately a number of children do come into A and E with issues caused by the parent, so follow up is fairly routine for the teams in my Trust.

I know you are coming from a good place...

But I personally don't think the OP is overreacting. She's had a dreadful evening in A&E with an injured child, she was flustered and concerned (as expected) and then finds out she's had a social services referral. I think that's enough to tap into most people's 'panic' gauge.

I agree the op is overthinking it and catastrophising, but I would be too. It must feel like a real 'accusation'. In this particular circumstance I don't think anything is wrong with op's mental health. I think it's an understandable reaction. Maybe I'm wrong ?

Honestly don't worry about it OP. I had a similar call after DS attended A&E twice in 6 months for a burn and then broken arm. They asked how we were doing and if we needed any support but after I said all fine and he was back at nursery never heard anything again (now 10+ years on).

I don't know what would trigger them to carry out any further investigation, but presumably it is a very cursory check that this is a one-off accident and DC isn't at risk. Better they make a call than potentially miss something.

Kindly, can I suggest it may be that you were told about the social services referral but, given you were upset yourself and naturally focussed on comforting your child, you may have forgotten about it?
I imagine that, in years to come, you will look back on this and realise that social services being involved in this type of scenario is totally appropriate and actually a good thing. Whilst in your case it was an accident, there will sadly be other little girls who suffer injuries like this intentionally. They cannot be prevented if there is no follow up of the ones where everyone appreciates that it was a simple accident.

Don’t worry, OP. It’s completely normal.

In case it helps you feel calmer, here was my experience. It happened to me once after I attended A&E with my 1.5 year old - she had picked up a bit of my husband’s nicotine gum and I couldn’t work out if she had ingested any so took her to A&E as a precautionary measure. It was all fine, we just waited around the hospital so they could keep an eye on her and within a few hours it was clear all was fine and we left. So a very minor incident - but I still got a call.

To reassure you further - your appearance won’t have played a role - I could not have looked more together on attending hospital - I was in a suit about to drop my daughter off at nursery on my way to work when the accident happened - but still got the call. My daughter at the time was happy and chatty and properly dressed etc and I still got the call. So please don’t go over all these little things and try to work out why you got a call. They are just being very cautious, as they should be.

In my situation I got the call a few days later from a social worker, explained what had happened (that my husband was an idiot for leaving nicotine gum lying around and I had since made him put it in a high drawer!) and that was that. And there has been no further impact or further calls or social services involvement. It was a one off accident, just like yours was.

Please don’t worry. It will all be fine. They will not take your daughter away for a one off minor accident.

I think these kind of referrals from a&e are treated slightly differently- the a&e staff would call it 'raising a safeguarding'. Normally done by the nurse at triage so though should be discussed there it might sometimes end up that neither the triage nurse nor the reviewing clinician mention it and both think the other will.
All the nurse does is forward the patient details to a generic email.
Next day a social worker checks the inbox, goes through them, acts as necessary.
Although it involves social worker contact no one would think of it as a referral to children's services in the same way as if we had actual concerns about NAI in which case the consultant paediatrician would be called in and child admitted.
If actual concerns about NAI I think it becomes fairly obvious quickly to the carers anyway as they'll be challenged on how the injuries came about. Seen a parent tie themselves in knots trying to explain how a child stood on a straightener but the burn was on top of the foot- very sad. Someone senior will have the conversation that the mechanism of injury is not plausible.

It's understandable to be concerned about ss involvement but they will need to be informed, as your toddler has burnt themselves. There is no specific type of family that gets support from ss. Im a loving mum but my DD had a social worker for a few months as a baby due to me being unable to keep myself safe, as a result of severe depression, which in turn put my DD at risk. All you can do is focus on your daughter and co operate with ss. They wouldn't remove your daughter over just this incident

@Knji I think you've hit on a really important point about hospital processes and why it might not be considered a referral to children's services in the same way - but it certainly feels like a real referral to the op who has been (unduly) stressed she could lose her child as a result. I think this is why it's so important for professionals to be transparent at all stages if a call from a social worker may be likely in the future.