DS table manners are so bad

[advicepleasethankyou123]

NC as want to avoid shame for DS.

DS is 12 going on 13, at secondary school. He eats with mouth open, makes sucking noises as he insists on nibbling food and smacks his lips together. Would still eat everything with his hands given half the chance - he is totally capable of using cutlery but just doesn't unless prompted. He gets food all over his face/in his fringe and food all over his hands and clothes. He rushes his eating, will take three or four bites in quick succession without swallowing any of it, he is usually finished a meal before we have even got 1/3 of the way through. It genuinely is unpleasant to eat a meal with him. I need some help as I'm worried he will get bullied or ostracised at school/with friends. We feel bad constantly saying 'stop doing XXX' at mealtimes, at a loss as to what to do.
He is ND but highly functioning. Mainstream school etc.

You need to rinse and repeat about table manners. No tv/games etc if he doesn’t eat properly. Start small but stick with it, it’s basic manners eating properly and as frustrating as it is you need to stick with it.

My son is 12, nearly 13 and in the last 6 months or so his table manners have gone completely down the drain with all the things you have mentioned here. He literally picks food up in his fingers whilst holding the fork like a weapon in his other hand. The only hope I can offer, is that we went out for a meal a few weeks ago with some friends, and his manners suddenly found him again! I’m hoping it’s one of those things like attitude that he only does in a safe space at home. In the mean time, I keep nagging in the hopes it sinks in!

@Decapitatedsausage unfortunately it's the same when out or eating with people outside of immediate family. He's never developed them. Used to do things like say 'no pudding' unless you do XYZ during the meal but it just made every meal into a battle zone... now wondering if we should have stuck with it.

@AperolWhore yes agree, thank you. Just wanted to sense check that I wasn't being over the top or unfair on him.

this might be a little old fashioned, I don’t know, but a tip I heard was to put a mirror in front on them when they’re eating so they can themselves