4 year old whinging morning to night

[boymum36]

My ds4 just does not stop whinging/moaning/crying all the time it's making me so unhappy. Most of the time there is absolutely no reason for it which is what I'm struggling the most with. This morning he was putting on his shoes and getting dressed and he was just whimpering the whole time for no reason! His 2 year old brother walked past him and touched him and he just started crying and moaning, he barely did anything! It is constant and I am so exhausted by it. I try to explain things to him but it doesn't help. For example if he's whinging because he wants his shoes I will say 'as soon as we get dressed you can have them' but he says the same thing over and over again whinging, it's like he's not understanding me or just ignoring me. What can I do?

This is not normal so it can’t be for absolutely no reason. Even if it’s for attention, that in itself is an actual reason. It might not be a great reason, but it’s still a reason.
Is he unhappy generally? Lethargic? In pain? Envious of newer sibling? Disliking his childcare? Does he just need distractions?

Could there be neurodivergence at play? Have you spoken to your GP?

@EmmaOvary he is extremely speech delayed and only started talking within last 6 months although nowhere near where he should be. He is also delayed in all areas. I suspect nd but nothing confirmed only speech delay.

@IUnderstandTheWeird he is generally happy, he has had a cough for a while now (been seen by doctors) but fine apart from that. Happy at nursery. Could be that he needs distractions but its hard when I also have a 2 year old and they don't play nicely together.