Baby + endless to do list + DIY

[NurtureGrow]

Hello all, I’m looking for ideas here.

We have a 4 month old baby, and no family nearby.

I also have a huge to do list, things for the house, diy, things for our baby, admin tasks (insurance etc), cleaning, making plans for future work. I am also not feeling good in myself and haven’t bought new clothes since before birth, and have just a couple of pairs of leggings that fit, and jeans which are torn and stained.. plus few tops that fit that I can also use whilst pumping or breastfeeding. I also need a haircut, to see the dentist, the list goes on!

I’m finding it difficult to move forward on much and get through the list, whilst also being present for our baby and my husband. My husband is great, especially with our baby, but he is not for example with DIY at all. I need to find time to fix the toilet seat, shower handle, reseal the bath. He suggested getting someone in, but they are relatively easy jobs, if I just had time. We also must save money at the moment.

Has anyone worked out how to manage all this? I’ve considered focusing on just one thing for a month. Ie house repairs for a month. Then onto the next thing. Ie sorting out my wardrobe for a month.. but I’m not sure this will work. Would be grateful for any suggestions, thank you x

Baby steps is the way to go. Focus on one thing at a time and use that momentum to do the next thing. I find setting a timer for 15 minutes for a particular chore a good way to get things done.
Get DH to mind the baby, preferably out of the house, while you get the DIY done.
Work to your strengths.

@BaMamma thank you, that’s a good idea.

I must admit, I do find it a bit annoying / overwhelming that I need to do DIY as well.. but I’ve learnt the hard way that my husband simply doesn’t know.. he can spend ages googling and then still not understand what to do. Or I show him something (like stripping wallpaper, amazingly he’d never done it) and then he digs into the wall and it needs to be re plastered. He’s great, but just doesn’t seem to live in the physical world like most people.. he is very focused and work, but good with our baby..

*focused on work

Your DH sounds like mine! He will say and do extraordinarily illogical and honestly just make a hash of things when it comes to DIY.

1. I gave a list of jobs to my father when he visited because he likes to be helpful in that way. I also booked other visits for when my parents or ILs visited from out of town and could take the kids for an hour or two.
2. I did some jobs myself when the older babies/toddlers (4m is still a bit young) were having the solid 1 or 2 naps each day so you get a good predictable chunk of time.
3. Sometimes my DH would take the toddlers for a day to his relatives and give me a day to do some jobs.
4. Lots of jobs just waited for my toddlers to be in daycare so I can currently clean and do DIY undisturbed one day a week.

For some of the jobs, can baby lay on a blanket or play mat next to you while you do them? It helped me a lot once I could put my baby on the floor next to me while I folded washing, changed the bed...

For new clothes - can you get your DH to take the baby while you go and try some things on, and then once you know what suits from each brand, go on Vinted/eBay?

This all sounds very familiar! With our DD we started to ocassionally be able to get things done as she edged past 6 months. Now she's a toddler, it's incredible what we can get done if we involve her.

In those earlier months, I wish I'd asked for more help from my DH, particularly in taking the baby for a few hours. Hands down, with the stage you are at, that will be your easiest option.

Sorry for the delayed reply!

@RickiRaccoon thank you for these ideas 🙏

@OtterMummy2024 he often doesn’t like laying on a blanket by himself.. but since you mentioned this I have tried putting him in a seat whilst I fold up/ hang washing and he seems to like this. It doesn’t work with cleaning the kitchen, but at least it does with laundry at the moment!

I also went to the Levi store and definitely planning to buy some things on Vinted/Ebay.. hopefully I won’t wear this size for too long!!

I’ve also started listing the core things I need to do and putting them on the fridge, then putting the bigger list (which is stressful) away

@AmyW9 good to know it got easier after 6 months! 🙏

Thank you all so much x