Budgeting for baby

[ByGreenBiscuit]

Wondered if you had any advice on whether I have gone overboard here, particularly on clothes - I admit I got overexcited on Vinted. I earn a decent amount but am really feeling the pinch at the mo with all these extra costs, so wondering about returning the clothes I've bought new. I'm a first time mum, so it's all new to me!

Clothes - total of £384
Have bought the following (leaving some gaps for people buying me stuff and hand me downs - I need to collect these, so not sure what I'm getting, I will know more on Sunday):

• pretty much all clothes up to 3 months
• a decent amount of 3-6 month
• a smattering of higher ages

This includes £200 on Vinted, and a £100 shop in M+S, then sales shopping at White Company. I know the M+S haul was naughty but I LOVE the designs.

Other bits - £596 spent
I've been gifted a cot, a bath, books,a moses basket.

Have bought bits around the side like thermometer, white noise machine, fitted sheets, 3 x bottles, feeding pillow(secondhand), towels, sleeping bags (secondhand), muslin sheets, etc. Got some nappies and bum cream, nipple cream, spritz for bits stuff, changing bag, sling, changing mat and liners etc.

I also bought a Tripp trapp high chair with newborn holder which was expensive new but same cost as secondhand pretty much (this was £280 so the brings costs up here a lot).

Room furniture and decor - £270

Includes wall paint, curtains, lamp, bookshelves, few other small bits.

To buy

• Still to buy a pram - that will probably be secondhand, or I might get one for free.
• I might also get a car seat for free.
• And I will probs need some breastfeeding paraphrenalia but going to see how it goes first.
• a bouncer (probs secondhand, £50 at most) - do I def need one?
• playmat (hopefully will be gifted as on amazon wishlist)

Total spent so far - £1,250. Have I gone massively over the top? How much did you spend?

well if there’s anything you want to return then return it but from now on buy everything you need used

Whether you’ve gone overboard really depends on whether you’ve got it to spend, but yeah, I’d say so!

It’s generally not a good idea to buy clothes too far in advance because until they’re born you have no real idea how big or small, or long your baby will be or how quickly they’ll grow, which could be an issue for anything remotely seasonal (I.e. long sleeves vs short, thick vs thin fabrics). Keep some of what you’ve bought and return the rest if you need the money. Plus it is soul destroying to watch a poo explosion destroy a pristine White Company sleep suit that cost the best part of £20 after a single wear…😂 Babies do not need brand new because they have zero respect for it!

The Tripp Trapp is an investment that will last so keep it. Just get secondhand bits from now on!

Its so fun shopping for your baby. Seems you've really enjoyed the experience!
Before spending any more, have you thought about putting money aside for during maternity leave?

I don't remember how much I spent (was a long time ago!) but I didn't buy much before she was born. Was gifted a new moses basket and some handmade blankets, and had maybe 10 vests and onesies plus cloth nappies (weren't fashionable yet, so that was £££) bought the car seat about an hour before I went into labour! And borrowed a sling, but did buy one later. I was a young mum and first from my friend group so hadn't been heavily influenced yet on all the things I was "supposed" to buy.

Ended up needing extra leave due to health issues from the pregnancy and was glad id saved up.

Very good points!! I'd say about 90% of the items are from Vinted, but about 30% of the clothes budget has gone on the new stuff because it's so much more expensive!

The White Company was heavily discounted for the most part, so more like the prices you'd get on Vinted (ie sleep suit for £6).

The M+S haul is all stuff for the future...maybe I should send back a few things and hope they turn up on Vinted. I've gotten very attached to a jacket I've bought for her but it's 6-9 months... and there's a couple of 12-18 months in there which is probs ridiculous!

I think this is it now for everything apart from bits mentioned. I need to delete Vinted! Glad you approve of the tripp trapp :)

I should have saved up to be able to do a whole year off (with work paying full pay for 6 months).

I think this is why I'm stressed really - it's the baby stuff, plus saving ridiculous amounts of money (I'm the higher earner in the house), plus paying off some work we had done on the house which is about £250 a month, etc etc.

TBH I'd given up trying for a baby as I thought I was too old and we'd been trying for a while, so we went on a couple of expensive holidays - which is where I got pregnant! But definitely overspent there, also paying those off bit by bit!

I do have a very decent savings pot already also.

I think pregnancy is probably making me more anxious than I need to be - ie why I'm up at 2am, putting together a spreadsheet of every penny I've spent along with an inventory of clothes!! Nesting instinct gone wrong?!

I also don't think Instagram is helping, as you say. Or being part of a whatsapp group with loads of other mums who all have great ideas on what the best brands are etc. I really need to just stop spending for a bit.

I would concentrate on the essentials first i.e. where is baby sleeping how is baby getting around - pram and car seat.
baby won't be in high chair for months yet but at least you have it now.

You have no idea how big or small baby will be when born ? tho that depends on how many weeks you are now ?

and you don't know how quickly baby will grow once born, some babies out grow their clothes quickly, some take longer to get bigger.
@Unsure4589 made a very good point re clothes being seasonal.

I had a lovely Dior snow suit for winter, baby was premature so didn't fit it in first winter and was too small by the next winter :(

I personally would return every M&S item as they are very good re returns - provided you bought it in the last 28 days...

I would think twice about getting a second hand pram. I got a lovely Mamas & Papas Ocarro on Marketplace. It was in great condition but one day thr handle snapped on it and it was unworkable. Obviously I had no comeback and had to go and get another pram. At least when you buy new you will get a replacement one sent immediately. Perhaps you could get one that's discounted?

The clothes buying is the best , all the tiny outfits 😍 Enjoy it!

I wouldn’t buy clothing too much in advance. For example mine didn’t even fit newborn size born as he was so long, so even the pack of three vests and sleepsuits in newborn were not used.
He also grew fast the first 6 months, so by winter he was in more like 9-12, 12-18 month clothing, so any winter 6month clothing would have been too small

the trip trapp is amazing. We still use 5 years on. If you get the newborn attachment you can use from birth

I get it with the clothes. Everything is so cute! We'd been trying for 4 years to conceive and it was just lovely to see all the little outfits hanging up in his wardrobe waiting for ds. I certainly wasn't going to dress him purely in sleepsuits for the next 6 months/year!

I'd return the clothes until the baby is born. I'd be weary of buying a second hand carseat though unless its from someone you know and trust. They have a life span and you need to check if they've ever been involved in an accident. You could do without the bouncer. I didn't have one for my 1st and didn't miss it. I have one for my second but defo could manage without.
If you think you are planning on having more children in the future, I'd invest in a new pram and car seat.

I would not risk a second hand car seat.

The clothes… if you’ve been buying on vinted you have too much 🤣🤣🤣 but that’s okay!!!!

it’s okay to enjoy your child! It sounds like you can afford it / earn well.

Mine wore fancy sleep suits (Mori etc) up to 6m or so as I liked zippy sleep suits and found it comfy and practical. I have some purchases I laugh at now especially baby dresses - pre 1 they don’t really work they just bunch up round the torso/armpits 🤣

in terms of outlay I prob spend about 800-900 for no 1 but we did ikea antilop as I know people who spent 1.5k on pram travel system so 🤷🏻‍♀️

i loved 2nd hand bargains and honestly it’s cool up to about 2 yrs as the clothing doesn’t get much wear after that it’s a bit of a false economy if you aren’t super selective.
i also have made over a grand on vinted across my 2 mat leaves 🥳🥳🥳

I also loved my 2nd hand bouncers we had 3 one on each floor and they cost me £40 total I had a baby bjorn and 2 fisher price terrazzo ones

Only thing I would say is clothes is hard. You have no idea if they will start in tiny baby, newborn or 0-3. They may last one week in a size (more common in newborn) or several months. Then your seasons might be out of whack.
Nothing sounds excessive and baby things can be expensive

If you can afford it then what you’ve spent is fine. There’s no need to spend that much though if you’re struggling. You only really need around 10 vests and sleep suits for a newborn, they’ll mainly be in sleep suits until a bit older. Your baby will most likely sick and poo on most of the clothes so no point buying anything too nice or expensive when they’re little, maybe one or two nicer outfits for special occasions but that’s it.

I have 2 young DCs and don’t really need to budget and probably spend around £50 a month between both of them, I get hand me downs from friends and buy bundles in Vinted and then just buy anything really needed like shoes and the odd outfit new.

It doesn’t sound too excessive if you can afford it. There’s no harm in enjoying shopping for your baby. You might also be able to resell some stuff on Vinted or Marketplace after use if you can be bothered. You will probably still be frantically ordering stuff from Amazon over the first few weeks.

I didn’t end up using the normal sleeping bags in 0-6 months as we used the Love to Dream swaddles followed by the transition ones with zip off arms. I also didn’t use coats much at under 12 - ended up with 3 coats in 6-9 gifted that we never used as I had a super warm foot muff sleeping bag thing for the pram which I preferred as it was easy to unzip when we went inside.

I also wouldn’t risk a second hand car seat unless from close family you could really trust and make sure it’s a good one as not all car seats are equal in terms of safety testing.

We used both the bouncer and the Tripp Trapp a lot so they were good investments. I really liked being able to put baby somewhere close to me while eating rather than awkwardly eating one handed all the time.

Agree we also didn’t use coats or snowsuits before walking age. Under walking they are better in cosy footmuff in pram with just thicker cardigan, hat, mittens in winter and additional blankets as needed. As when they fall asleep in pram and you go inside house, or cafe or shop it’s then way too hot and you can’t easily remove a coat or snowsuit but you can blankets and unfold footmuff. In sling coats too puffy anyway so again layers and wrapped thick blanket over outside of sling and baby when cold

Actually, this is a really good point. I’ve gone through a lot fertility wise, spent large amounts of money I didn’t have and stayed up countless nights sleepless and worrying it would never happen over about ten years. So maybe splurging a bit and enjoying the anticipation is ok :) Also I hear you on outfits!! No way is she just staying in white rompers.

Thank you. The car seat is from a good friend and in excellent condition / no knocks etc. but I’ve asked her to dig out the receipt so I know when it was bought so I go nowhere near it expiring.

there is a part of me that is very tempted by the Joolz hub 2 travel system tho - it’s expensive, £1500, but I have fallen in love.

might have to see how much I win on premium bonds this month 🤣

Me and family stocked up on clothes before DD was born as well as nappies and I'm so glad we did as those first few months we didnt need to buy them it really helps so I could start on bigger sizes, we bought from newborn to 0-3 and that lasted until she was 7 months albeit Most babies grow faster it was great for us, now when I buy the next sizes in preparation just grabbing a few baby grows and vests can easily cost 100, baby clothes are so expensive but you can sell on Facebook/vinted. You wont make all money spent back but a good chunk

I think I have bought maybe a handful of dresses but vast majority of my splurges are cute rompers in 0-3 and 3-6 months!

bought 3 sleepsuits in preemie size for grand total of £1.20, and have some newborn clothes but only a handful - probs spent about a tenner.

I’m a geek, so I worked out the cost per item for Vinted so far is £2.40, and that’s with mostly nice brands like John Lewis, White Company, M&S and a few other cute brands. Some supermarkets too.

This was also my thinking. I didn’t want to be panic buying expensive next day delivery things when I could buy 7 John Lewis sleep suits for £3 on Vinted if I was more organised. Glad it worked for you!

Honestly if you can afford it then I wouldn’t think too much about the cost.

My daughter is 10 months old now so this was me not too long ago and I wouldn’t say £1250 is too bad considering our nursery furniture set alone was about £1400 and our pram was about the same.

For what it’s worth I do think buying things while pregnant helps in the long run before you’re on maternity pay, the first year is expensive with clothes only lasting 3 months (sometimes less if growing quickly) so if you can spread that cost further it’s not a bad idea!

The highchair is sensible too, I noticed when my baby hit 6 months I suddenly had loads to buy. She had gone from being a tiny baby to an actual little child, she needed a highchair/bibs/cutlery/bowls etc for weaning, she also needed all new toys for the next stage of development because the tiny baby toys weren’t cutting it anymore so spreading that cost further would be helpful to save a huge spend at 6 months.

Thank you! This is a good tip. I think I’ve got one pram suit / onesie thing which is fleece, so not the puffa type; that’s it and I’ll leave any more for now.

Thank you, yes that’s a great point about when they are six months. I have a weaning set on my Amazon wish list and I already have some bibs. Also the playmat should last till 1 year (it’s that expensive Love Every one).

. Hoping I get gifted some toys from my friend who buys everything from John Lewis - she’s given us a great haul of books so far and I’m off to her mums attic in the next couple of weeks where more goodies await!

If you plan to have another I would get the pram 😊 You will have comeback should it ever break and you'll love it . It's your biggest purchase when having a baby. After all your tough times I think you should definitely treat yourself. You could always pay it off gradually.