We have a 3 1/2 year old and he's been having rage tantrums where he will throw things, kick and hit me, and recently started biting. He gets so angry and will scream and scream. He once flew into a rage tried to trash his room throwing everything into a pile. Recently he had an awful screaming tantrum for almost an hour at bedtime and our neighbour came round concerned that something was wrong. I was by myself as my husband was out and I felt so embarrassed because I couldn't control him and he was so loud.
Bedtime is a major trigger at the moment and I had an hour of screaming the other night because I told him it was bed time and he ran out of his room and hid. Then was laughing as if he had won. At it's worst we have had to grab him and drag him kicking and screaming to his room and then sit with him blocking the door until he calms down for a story and gets into bed which he has eventually. Now we turn out all the lights and say we're going to bed ourselves and that seems to help.
The other trigger is transitions and getting him to Preschool or childminder which generally he really loves and used to be fine with. He is fine whilst he is at nursery/childminder (no issues with hitting other children or anything like that) he saves it up for us mainly.
I don't think he has any development issues except he is delayed with potty training and we have not been able to make any consistent progress. He is just so wilful, if he isn't interested that's it.
The so called 'terrible twos' were a walk in the park compared to this! My questions are: will this get better with time? Is 3.5 a tricky age and it will improve? Any tips for managing the rage tantrums?
What do you do when they are screaming etc but you absolutely have to leave or they absolutely have to go to bed? Is it OK to carry them out kicking and screaming and force them into a car seat or carry them into their room?