4 month old daytime naps

[SharpOliveCat]

Hello,
I am trying to figure out my 4 month old baby girls naps but it isn't going so well. Should I be strict about following wake windows and then trying her for a nap? Sometimes she just isn't tired after 2 hours awake but will want a formula feed 2.5 hours after her last one and fall asleep before having it all, would this be because she is overtired? Iv tried rocking her to sleep after 2 hours but it doesn't always work, again could this be over tiredness? Sometimes she will have a feed and want to go to sleep straight after but only has a short nap which is fine, I then let her play for half an hour and give her another feed so her feeds can be anywhere between 2.5 to 4 hours apart. Also there are days where she wakes from her last nap of the day at 3pm and I try to keep her awake until 6.30pm to start bedtime routine and asleep by 7pm. Is this too long? Also she has started waking in the middle of the night chatting to herself but then wants a feed,would this be because her daytime naps are a bit messed up?
Thank you for any advice

Also do I need to be more structured with her or just follow her lead?

I think every baby is so different but I chose the approach of following my DS lead. He's 6 months now and only just starting to stablish a routine. I was driving myself mad in the early days trying to strictly follow wake windows and establish routines but they're just so young and trying to figure it out themselves too. My DS would never ever do what was recommended with sleep/wake windows so I had no choice but to follow his lead. I think 4 months is still so young so don't be too hard on yourself. Would your LO be due to increase her volume of formula maybe? Might stretch it out a bit more than 2.5 hours. That way you could put her down for her nap and she'd be due a feed after nap time. Just a thought but might not be what she wants just yet.

Echoing pp - might not be what you are looking for, but I have always followed my babies lead rather than following wake windows etc (although her needs roughly are in line with wake windows). She will be 8 months tomorrow and only started doing longer naps around 4 weeks ago - this has helped with a bit more of a routine but sometimes she is tired after 2 hours and sometimes after 3. I find not having a strict routine also means she is more flexible when we are out and about etc. Appreciate this isn't for everyone.

I think it's all a bit of trial and error and as soon as you think you have cracked it they change it up and you are looking for the answer again 🤣

Thank you remaininghopeful. I think your right that every baby is different, my partner thinks I'm bonkers that I try to follow routines with baby girl and thinks I should go with the flow. Believe it or not she's my 4th so I should know what I'm doing but there is a 15 year age gap between her and my next youngest and I honestly haven't got a clue. I do need to follow her lead more I think. I have tried upping the oz to her formula, she started draining 6oz bottles so started making 7 oz and now she will only take 5oz but if I started only making 6oz again she starts draining them again! I'm sure she knows she runs rings round me 😆 she had a long sleep at lunchtime today but wanted to stay awake from 1pm, which was too long in my opinion so stood in the dark in the downstairs toilet rocking her only for her to have a 20 min nap and then wake up. Just got her into bed now. Maybe if I tune into her more I will notice her cues and things because right now I still make mistakes.

Thank you carrot678. I am deffo going to try and follow her lead more, honestly though sometimes she can happily stay awake for about 4 hours! Her dad's a bit of a weird sleeper though and she is his clone in looks so probably in nature too, which might or might not be a good thing 😆 and it deffo is all trial and error, there's some things I think iv cracked and then baby girl rocks the boat again 😆 she is deffo keeping me on my toes

At 4 months my daughters naps were all over the place. Every Tuesday she had a 5h nap in the afternoon!
Around 5 and a half month she settled into a more defined pattern. She was 4.5 months when she had her reflux adequately treated and her allergies diagnosed and it was only once these were managed that she became remotely predictable. I would keep track of when she napped and I would look over the previous few days to see when she might want a nap. I didn't get on with awake windows so I didn't pay that much attention but did find things got more into a routine once realising she she had irregular awake times during the day. She had a short window between waking and her first nap. A longer gap to nap 2 a very short gap to nap 3 (1h) which merged into 1 nap around 6 months and then a long gap to a late nap around 8 which turned into bedtime around 6-7 months.
Around 5.5-6 months I got into the habit of heading out for a walking nap after lunch. This was the first nap that became routine.

Thank you superscientist, I also think I do need to keep track of her naps, iv tried huckleberry but can't get on with it because you have to use their stopwatch to track naps, I can never remember to start and stop it. Maybe a good old fashioned notepad and pen would be better. My partner doesn't really help with naps, he doesn't see a problem with her being awake all day but I worry because I know babies need naps. Especially so they aren't having melt downs due to over tiredness. I don't remember any of this with my others but it was so long ago. I also need to get her out of the house more, I try to take her to the supermarket once a week or a walk around town but other then that I'm happy staying in but it must be boring for her. I had a emergency c section for her birth and it's taken me a while to get back on my feet. I do stress about her naps, keeping track of them over the next few days might help me see a pattern. I try to do bedtime routine at half 6 and she's usually asleep by 7pm. Something I need to keep going as I need to return to work soon, I'm lucky to be able to work from home but the only time I'm going to be able to is by doing night shifts. Iv been so hung up on routines with baby girl, maybe I just need to have more faith in her, she knows when she is tired. Wake windows are so confusing for me and little lass really doesn't pay them much attention 🤣

I can't remember what app (baby tracker maybe) I used but it was whatever free came up near the top in the play store and you could use it as a timer but you could also add/edit sleeps etc whenever you half remembered. Don't worry about exact details but knowing its 10 am and not 10.30 am would be enough. 20 /30/45/60 minutes etc. I could plot the naps over the course of a week which was good for spotting patterns
Notes section on your phone might help for a lower tech approach
I loved the app as I could keep track of when she had her meds. My partner didn't understand my insistence on recording them until he started taking her in the mornings at the weekend and had to remember whether she had had everything when she was meant to!

Also a 5 hour nap sounds bliss 😆 I'm hoping baby girl does settle into her own pattern too. There is times I think she will have a long nap so I try to have a kip and then she wakes up 😁

I will try looking for apps, or even just using the notepad on my phone. I know it sounds daft but I also worry when she's been awake for a long time,she's still so little and I feel awful when I'm tired and worry she does too. I have become obsessed with her naps. Also feeds if I'm honest, sometimes I think she is hungry and then she refuses the bottle, other times I leave her a bit and she gets over hungry and has a meltdown. I'm hopeless. I am very very lucky that she is a happy baby but also because she is it means I don't always see her hunger or tired cues until it's too late. There is times she will just want a cuddle straight after a feed and then go to sleep and I'm grateful when she does that because then I know she's the one doing it and I'm not trying to make her nap when she isn't tired. How on earth did parents cope before the Internet made them worry about naps so much 😆

I had to try follow a routine for my baby as she would absolutely refuse to day nap, and then get overtired and it felt like a cycle of hell at the time!
She would never ever just fall asleep herself when she needed - looking back I think she struggled with being over stimulated. She's now almost 2 and a fantastic sleeper and napper!

Do sleep training on the internet. It puts your baby on a schedule and it works. All 3 of my grandchildren sleep when put to bed. They also have a longer time between feeding
s. I don’t know exactly how it works. There’s also a thing called leaps, you can see where you babies milestone are by it and what they should be doing at certain months. It’s also on line. It’s pretty accurate

It’s not bonkers, it’s just extremely hard but being persistent makes it work. Adjustment made as you go along also happen