Can father circumcise son without mothers consent?

[shrekthree]

Hi all, I am worried sick as my son’s dad keeps on pushing circumcision, despite knowing I don’t want our son to have it.

We split up last year and I moved an hour away so contact is only once a week and in my local area but he has spoken to me this week about it again, almost in a, “this is what’s going to happen way.”

I’m not scared of him taking my son to get it done whilst he has contact, as it’s only for a couple of hours and he wouldn’t know any one in my area who does it. But as our son is getting older (he’s 2 now) he wants to start having him overnight and for weekends etc which I am not against as I know it’s important for our son, but I’m so scared he will go behind my back and take him somewhere to get it done.

For added context, his whole family is very pro circumcision and I know his mum is in his ear about it too. We broke up for numerous reasons to be honest, one of the main ones was that I couldn’t trust him as he lied a lot. So it’s not like I even feel comfortable taking his word for it, which he hasn’t even given me anyway.

I have my son’s birth certificate and passport by the way.

If anyone has any insight on this matter I’d really appreciate it thank you. 🙏

Also, he would 100% go to one of those Jewish doctors who come to your own house instead of a clinic/hospital, who I feel would be more strict on checking for both parents consent.

I feel like my sons fate is in the hands of someone I don’t know; who could easily not even be a doctor, as I’ve just read from someone who posted here that lawfully circumcision does not need to be done my medical professionals. Like wtaf?

I have done some reading on prohibited steps order and I think that is the best/only route for me to take.

Unfortunately “There is no requirement in law for professionals undertaking male circumcision to be medically trained or to have proven expertise. Traditionally, religious leaders or respected elders may conduct this practice.”

Prohibited Steps Order. You can make the application online and represent yourself. You won't get legal aid. That's what I would do.

This is alarming...

www.theguardian.com/society/2010/jul/11/doctors-urge-circumcision-on-nhs

Circumcision is not illegal in the UK.

And horrifyingly there is no legal requirement for anyone carrying out circumcision to be medically qualified, trained or have any medical expertise at all.

A Prohibited Steps Order is legally enforceable in that breaking it is considered contempt of court which is viewed very seriously and could lead to prison

His family will know full well that circumcision is legal as it sounds as if they are a religion / culture that practices it.

I would get a PSO asap, not allow overnight or weekend contact until it is in place, I would ask the GP to put a note on his online medical records and probably ask advice from health visitor and social services too, if possible.

A mohel wouldn't do a 2 year old.

A registered doctor might, but they have their licence on the line and hopefully are strict on consent.

The child is 2

The thing about a prohibitive steps order is I believe often comes with a child arrangements order.

Right now you kind of have control to an extent. But if you go to court for a prohibitive steps order to prevent circumcision - he could also get a court order awarding him overnights/weekends all the way up to 50/50 shared care.

@Florence19791 alongside the misinformation you have posted on this thread you seem naively complacent about the very real possibility that certain communities will very easily find someone to do this in the say so of a father with PR.

Which would be illegal with or without a prohibited steps order

There’s every chance the ex or his family would get someone who is not a medical doctor to do it.

Talk to your GP or HV about this. It needs to be on his medical records that you are concerned about this and do not consent. And private Dr is supposed to get the consent of both parents, but if this is on his NHS record, it offers an added protection.

Two years old is too old for someone in the community to circumcise him. With a baby it is a fairly easy procedure, more difficult with a 2 year old. But I would say to your ex that a circumcision needs the written consent of both parents, and if he tried to fake your consent, you will tell the police.

It's not illegal.

The problem is that once it's done it's done. I wouldn't be allowing contact on that level unless it's court mandated. And is be telling the court why.

The court will not deny contact on this basis. And the ex will easily get contact.

Yes, but hopefully not contact with enough time to arrange this to happen.

He could get 50/50 if he wanted it. I assume he does not though.