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Rude behaviour from 6 year old - how to handle this

3 replies

Namechangerchanger · 02/02/2025 11:55

Family member has a 6 year we see often. I also have a 6 year old so we do stuff socially at home and days out etc.

Child is increasingly rude to their parents, none of my business, their parents tell me they are struggling, I just gently say they maybe need to find what's right for them. Not my circus etc.

However recently the child is being rude to me and DH on a few occasions that have left us speechless. I'm wondering what to say to gently help this child (and their parents).

Examples including kicking a football in my head and telling their mum they don't need to say sorry because it was an accident.

At a restaurant, twice this child has taken my plate and said they wanted the food and I could have theirs. Told my DC to take my drink?!

Another time, it was time to leave soft play and I asked my DC to get their coat on. Child shouted at me "(my DC) is doing something, you are just slowing us down".

Another time in the car, DH asked our DC to sit still so he could check their car seat, other child shouted at DH to stop what he was doing and just drive.

I'm feeling exasperated each time I see this child! They are bossy to their own parents but I won't stand for it myself. Both parents try to correct the child each time something has happened but it's not helping. I think in some ways the child probably gets punished later and is acting out.

DH thinks we should distance ourselves, which is a shame for my DC as they do generally get on well together, they just seem to have awful behavior to adults.

How would you deal with this? What is your response when faced with rude behaviour like this?

OP posts:
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Whatabouthow · 02/02/2025 11:58

I would also distance myself until they do a better job of managing the behaviour in the moment.

And I would also talk to them directly at the time about how they need to ask if they want something.

TrivialSoul · 02/02/2025 11:59

If the other parents aren't there then I would discipline the child as I would my own so whatever consequences for the behaviour that you would give your child should apply to them as well. If the other parents are already talking about struggling with the child's behaviour then why not chat to them about possible strategies and offer to back them up when you are with them so that the child sees some consistency from the adults around them.

Whyherewego · 02/02/2025 12:00

Maybe check in with parents first but I'd tell them off. So "that's enough" or "stop that" or "please don't talk to me/DC like that".
I find that most kids respond better to telling off by people other than their parents

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