Do you let baby’s dad stay at your house?

[ZanyPinkSeal]

Hi,
I’m wondering if anyone had some advice on what healthy coparenting looks like?
I am currently pregnant and broken up with partner. He lives far like 2 hours away. Is it normal for him to stay over when thinking about the post partum period? I would be uncomfortable he is not abusive but I don’t particularly want him in my space. Is that petty? In general what would coparenting look like with an ex so far away and what is fair? I was hoping he would come for the day and we meet in neutral space, but he isn’t happy with that. I understand he would wanna be close to the child and that is best for the child but I don’t see why I have to be the one that facilitates it

You are not obliged to do anything that makes you uncomfortable, especially if you feel he's likely to keep pushing boundaries.

What lead to the geographical distance? If he moved away knowing you were pregnant, then making the travel work is his problem. If you moved or you fell pregnant while dating long distance, I'd be more accommodating, which still doesn't mean having him stay, but could look like either letting him visit at home during the day (keeping baby out all day can be exhausting) or taking baby to him/meeting half was some if the time.

You would be uncomfortable with it. That's all you need to know. It's a no, in that case and anyone pushing their agenda to be in your space when you're uncomfortable with it is an issue.

He had a logistical issue that he needs to work out. That's not your job.

I use to. and mine are much older. He use to sleep over as he wouldn't take them to his. But I don't know any other women that did though. I stopped because he kept trying it on with me when he stayed over.

You've suggested a neutral space which is very reasonable. He's not happy with that. His happiness doesn't override your need to feel comfortable in your own home especially as a new mother. You need support, not a difficult man prioritising his agenda.