I have 3.5 yo and 8mo. My eldest is quite used to being entertained or interacting with us, either playing games together or her being around and chatting or helping while we do household chores.
Today, we wondered whether we might be at a stage where we can do our own leisurely things with her in the room, but not actively entertaining her. While littlest napped on my partner, I told eldest I was going to do some embroidery. We were all together in the same room, and I said she could watch me and I would talk through what I was doing.
Fine for a minute or two but ultimately her response to boredom is to get disruptive, low level kicking me, pushing in to me “lovingly”, pulling apart my threads etc. I asked for some space and she kept pushing, so I got up and sat at the table (still same room). Then she proceeded to crunch cereal all over the room and take off the sofa cushions. I let her, thinking this is just her experimenting in response to boredom, and just said that we’d tidy it up together after. But then she started to try and wake up littlest and it all just gets a bit stressful from there.
Is she just too young for us to do our own thing? Were we being selfish? When can yours play independently? She had lots of open ended toys like tiles, beads, role play stuff, all available in the same room.