Fulltime working parents how do you juggle everything without feeling overwhelmed?

[YourBlueFox]

Hi everyone, long-time lurker and first-time poster.

I’m a mum of two (5 and 8) and honestly, I’m struggling to keep up with everything (who isn't?). Between school runs, both of us working full-time, laundry, meal prep and just keeping the house in some semblance of order, I feel like I’m constantly playing catch-up.

I’ve tried planners and have outsourced some tasks, like using HelloFresh for meals and hiring a cleaner. We’ve also tried splitting different responsibilities between my partner and me (bless him; he’s just as busy as I am), but it still feels like there’s never enough time in the day, and my to-do list never seems to shrink.

Do you have any go-to strategies for staying on top of things? Or even just tips for carving out a little “me time” in the chaos?

Thanks in advance—I’m all ears!

I used to manage this as a single mum. But the only way was to stop doing all the things that my mum thought were important, like ironing and daily dusting, and to have set routines.
Give use some more details about your daily routine and who does what, and perhaps we can make suggestions.

I agree - decide what is important in your and your childrens lives and dump other things. And theres no 'bless him' about your partner doing an equal share, he needs to take half the mental and physical load of parenting and household.
One of the best things I did (apart from having a DH who truly was an equal partner) was to have a cleaner who would deal with laundry. Also we dry over a dehumidifier so as much as humanly possible is dried on a hanger and can be put away like that

I work 4 days and DH is full time. My kids are 5 and nearly 2 so I spend my day off with the toddler and get absolutely nothing done so it's as good as working full time!

We also do hello fresh, but no cleaner as our house is fairly small so we manage to (quite badly) stay on top of some of the cleaning.
I think we're winging it to be honest.
We do the food shop on a Sunday morning with the kids in tow. It's hard work but something we can all do together that kills some time!
Washing will go on a timer delay during the working day and then another load goes in as soon as one of us gets home, with the first lot in the tumble dryer.
Any items that we don't tumble dry similarly to you go on hangers above the dehumidifier.
I have a spreadsheet which has all our money going in and out and reminders for stuff like MOT's, home insurance renewal etc, also try to be mega organised with holiday clubs and everything like that.

It's full on, and I think it helps we're organised people by nature. I'm sorry I don't really have any ideas for you but wanted to say I'm in the same boat.
Also I had hope that when mine were both at school and the same age as yours that things might feel easier, but I guess I should realise that school hours and breakfast/after school club is much harder than nursery!!

Some things we do:

Meal plan, make extra so you can eat meals over 2 nights and food shop online to save time and avoid impulse purchases.

Have an easy dinner night - beige freezer food or egg/beans type thing.

Stick a load of washing on at night with a delay so it's ready for when you get up. Hang up in the morning or stick bits in the dryer.

Stick a timer on, everyone tidies up for 10 mins or whatever.

Keep on top of ironing by doing 30 mins most days. I do it in front of the TV. If you don't iron, maybe use the time to fold laundry.

If you have money to burn, get a weekly cleaner. It forces us to keep the house at a reasonably tidy level throughout the week and she irons a few duvet covers and bits, which all helps.

It's always worth prepping for the next morning even if you really don't feel like it.

Ban looking at your phone in the evening until 9pm otherwise 30 mins have passed and you've got nothing to show for it.

We've both compressed into 4 days, so 2 days of the working week there is 1 parent home to get food shopping cleaning, tidying done etc. use breakfast club and after school clubs so we can pop to shops if needed on way home from work.

We've got a cleaner as well

i have no magic answer but I have found a few things:

1 - one touch rule, if you pick something up aim not to touch it again meaning put it where it belongs. Example is picking up a cup and putting it straight into the dishwasher don’t put it next to the sink. Don’t take your coat off and put it on a chair, hang it up where it belongs.

2 - make double of freezable meals, making a lasange…make a spare and pop it in the freezer.

3 - we do family cleaning time. Put on a timer for 15 mins and speed clean but everyone is involved. Kids are asked to sort toys, basic dusting etc. Of if it’s just you set a 30min timer and speed clean some how I’m way more productive against a clock

Single mum with 3 kids and a full time job here. It just IS bloody overwhelming! Sometimes I feel relatively in control but it doesn't take much for it all to pile up. Strict routines, a weekly cleaner and lowering my expectations around downtime are how I manage it. I have to push through a lot of exhaustion.

On Sundays I have the shopping delivered, do some batch cooking for the week ahead and fold & put away the piles of laundry that accumulate over the week. That gives me a bit of a headstart. But if that stuff doesn't get done for whatever reason (especially the laundry), then I find I'm playing for the whole week. It's relentless.

I dramatically reduced all cooking time, now it’s 5 mins prep tops. I waste approx 45 mins batch cooking every weekend so it’s all good to go during the week and drastically lowered my standards.
e.g one giant pot of tomato soup = 4 meals, soup and salad, soup and bread, pasta with soup as sauce plus freezer veg and soup over some chicken as a tray bake.

i also lowered cleaning standards, I do bathrooms once every 2 weeks.

i also changed my children’s hobbies so they fit in better e.g. I go for a run whilst one is at gymnastics and I work at the swimming pool whilst they have lessons, and those not in the pool sit and read and do homework next to me. No hobbies are more than 15mins drive and they all do the same things.

I also set my alarm earlier and started going to bed earlier, more sleep helped with less anxiety plus half an hour in the morning with a cuppa before everyone wakes up has been wonderful.

meat out of the freezer the night before. I then make a curry or chilli before work the next morning. So dinner ready when we get home. We only have the one child. When she plays football I take the laptop to sit in a cafe to catch up on work and life admin. And then go out to watch half the game. Same as when she is training. None of this standing on the side malarkey. Same as when she refs. Out comes the laptop for life admin. Sunday: batch make soup for the week and a winter salad for lunches. Good luck

I’d also recommend audiobooks or podcasts whilst doing household tasks, it helps it feel more like downtime if you listen to a good book whilst washing up

My cleaner changes the beds that helps for sure
I send the ironing out
Cook every 2 days (this one is so helpful) so a curry cooked on Monday eaten on Monday and Tuesday etc
Keep children's hobby paraphernalia in the same bag eg swimming kit, hat, towels etc all in a bag ready to grab not having to pack each time
Get myself up and dressed before everyone else

I also set my alarm earlier and started going to bed earlier, more sleep helped with less anxiety plus half an hour in the morning with a cuppa before everyone wakes up has been wonderful.

^ I'm a SAHM to children home with me full time (under school age) and so I have the children with me all the time apart from when some are napping. It means not only do I do almost no chores (or it takes many more hours to do together what is a 20 mins chore childfree) nor do I get much me time until 10pm when they're asleep...then I catch up on chores. So I am thinking something has to give here because I'm shattered a lot....and I really like your idea so will try this!

Things I find helpful: twice weekly food shop delivery so not having to pop to shops in between; weekly cleaner; slow cooker meals (some of which last two nights): batch cooking one or two things every weekend for the week; 15 minute tidy up blitz with the kids; load of washing in every night and popped in the dryer every morning. Fold laundry in front of telly

Eventually they grow up and leave home!

Do you have childcare in place for the hours you are at work? A lot of people don't and that looks enormously more stressful to me. Way more juggling required.

We have busy weeks but no clubs at weekends. I tend to do the bare minimum in the week (like the dishwasher and feeding people) and store everything else up for the weekend.